


Soft Heart

by pandorasv13



Series: Hearts [1]
Category: K-pop, SHINee, Super Junior
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Childhood Friends, Heavy Angst, M/M, Very long, jumps around a lot, lots of sleeping around, pretty confusing, really old fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-16
Updated: 2017-10-16
Packaged: 2019-01-18 05:43:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 43
Words: 62,063
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12382068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pandorasv13/pseuds/pandorasv13
Summary: They weren’t always together but somehow it always felt like they were. It was impossible to keep them apart when they were in the same room. Any and all group activities were done with those two keeping to themselves. Sungmin had no doubts that if Ryeowook wasn’t so incredibly adorable and Kyuhyun wasn’t so incredibly confident, their names would’ve been lost in the student roster. But they were those things, and therefore everyone allowed them to do as they pleased, even if it meant they ostracized the rest of the world.





	1. Chapter 1

They had been together for who knows how long. Really, who knew how long? Ryeowook had tried calculating it but he couldn’t get past a certain chunk of time around the seventh grade. It was just a mess, not something worth talking about.

Ryeowook set his pen down, leaning back on the palms of his hands. Tally marks, numbers, and dates covered his notebook page, creating a web of incoherence. He could read it perfectly fine, and Kyuhyun probably would’ve had an easy time as well. But everyone else would have been at a loss. A pang of sadness struck Ryeowook’s chest and he glanced down, tapping the place over his heart curiously. Did he eat too much for breakfast? What a strange occurrence.

“Wookie~!” Sungmin tackled Ryeowook off the bench and to the ground. The attacker nuzzled his best friend’s neck happily, arms wrapped around Ryeowook. “I was looking all over for you! The cooking club blew up something again and I was wondering if you could help?”

Ryeowook smiled, patting Sungmin’s back, “Sure, I don’t mind, Minnie…but you have to get off of me, hmm?” He laughed a bit, shifting beneath his friend’s weight.

Dark eyes shot up at Ryeowook. “Not yet,” Sungmin whispered, attitude changing. Passersby whistled and howled at them. The ones playing sports turned to look, some of them blushing or shouting playfully.

“Fan service again?” Ryeowook sighed. Sungmin nodded curtly. It was silly but the student body had taken a liking to the two of them. Ever since they entered high school a few months prior, the all-boys’ academy had become obsessed with the adorable pair. Having one idol to drool over was nice, but having two idols that “loved” skinship would keep the testosterone atmosphere fresher. And being the kindly youth that he was, Ryeowook couldn’t say no.

“Mid-terms are coming up and everyone’s stressing,” Sungmin explained, holding the side of Ryeowook’s face and smiling cutely for the hidden cameras, “so it’d be good if we did a little extra for them.”

“Oh…alright, I guess that’s okay…,” Ryeowook murmured, blushing. He always felt uncomfortable when Sungmin got so close. The other boy was attractive after all.

Sungmin winked, “Yeah, good little Wookie.” He leaned closer, getting ready to kiss Ryeowook’s cheek.

“Just because you look like a stupid bunny doesn’t mean you should act like one too,” Kyuhyun said, grabbing Ryeowook by his upper arms and dragging him to a standing position. Sungmin was flung over, landing unceremoniously on his backside.

Ryeowook looked up at Kyuhyun and smiled. “Hi Kyu~! What are you doing here?” The handsome boy was scheduled to be tutoring in a building on the other side of the campus. So why was he all the way over by the sports grounds?

“Yeah, what are you doing here?” Sungmin ground out, wincing and sitting up.

“Ryeowook gets into weird situations whenever I’m away,” Kyuhyun replied, not even bothering to look at the person he spoke to, “like just now. That wouldn’t happen if I was around.”

No one could argue. Ryeowook never got hounded or forced into doing stuff when Kyuhyun was beside him. But then again, who was brave enough to mess with the devilish freshman? Everyone already had a taste of Kyuhyun’s harsh speech and quite honestly, no one wanted to be torn down for a second time, well, except for Sungmin but that bunny-child was just so persistent.

“Let’s get to class,” that deep, soothing voice stated near Ryeowook’s ear.

“But the bell doesn’t ring—,” Ryeowook began, but Kyuhyun was already dragging him away.

Sungmin watched the pair go. They weren’t always together but somehow it always felt like they were…if that makes sense. It was impossible to keep them apart when they were in the same room. Any and all group activities were done with those two keeping to themselves. Sungmin had no doubts that if Ryeowook wasn’t so incredibly adorable and Kyuhyun wasn’t so incredibly confident, their names would’ve been lost in the student roster. But they were those things, and therefore everyone allowed them to do as they pleased, even if it meant they ostracized the rest of the world.

 

“I was try…ing to fig..ure out h..—mmph, long we’ve been to…geth—mm!” Ryeowook felt Kyuhyun’s tongue slip between his lips, exploring the inside of his mouth without restraint. Strong arms tightly held Ryeowook around the waist, keeping him securely in Kyuhyun’s lap.

When the latter finally backed away to breathe, he said, “What were you saying?”

Ryeowook frowned and then shook his head sadly. “I can’t remember anymore…it’s your fault for kissing me, Kyu.” He wriggled around, trying to get away. “We’re going to be late for class if we stay here.”

“No big deal,” he said, “it’s not like we have any big tests today.”

“That’s true…,” Ryeowook mumbled, “but skipping class isn’t right. We shouldn’t disrespect our elders, Kyu.”

“I disrespect you, _hyung_ ,” Kyuhyun smirked, leading Ryeowook’s face closer to his, “but you don’t mind right? We’ve always been like this. And teachers have always been disrespected by their students. I don’t see anything wrong.” He kissed the slender boy again. “Tell me that I’m wrong?”

Ryeowook pouted. It wasn’t fair that he was such a smooth talker. Why couldn’t he use those powers for good? Everyone would surely be happier if that was the case. But _no_ , the handsome, sharp-tongued boy had to rationalize the worst things.

“What’s up?” Kyuhyun asked, sweeping his thumb across the other boy’s bottom lip. “You look sad, Wookie.”

“It’s nothing,” he sighed, smiling tiredly, “you’re explanation isn’t bad, Kyu.”

“Yeah I know.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

The school campus was always so beautiful at night. All the stars were visible since the property was so far away from society. Forests surrounded the place on all sides. The only way to leave was through the front gates. There were sister schools floating around the area, but none close enough to disrupt the removed atmosphere of the academy.

Ryeowook rubbed his eyes tiredly, peering around the dorm room. The window was uncovered, allowing bright moonlight to stain the floor. He checked the time, smiling drowsily. It was a little past midnight, perfect! Ryeowook stumbled out of bed, silently shuffling across the hardwood floors. He didn’t want to wake up Kyuhyun. They had a bunk bed and movement on the lower one could cause the upper one to shake…probably. Ryeowook wasn’t very adept at math and science. He preferred liberal arts and things of that nature.

The only science related thing he liked was probably astronomy, and that was exactly what woke him up that night. Ryeowook didn’t bother to change out of his pajamas, just put his glasses on, grabbed his camera, and quietly left the room.

There were no teachers patrolling, probably because the school was supposed to be super elite. Guarding the students was a ridiculous notion. Ryeowook yawned and stretched, slapping his cheeks a few times. He didn’t want to be sleepy when he got to the rooftop.

_Around the bend, up a flight of stairs, down a long hallway, up another flight of stairs, and then turn the handle of the metal door…_

Ryeowook felt a warm gust of early autumn air and smiled happily. He loved fall the most. The world filled with color and the sweet scents of maple syrup were all you could smell for months. He opened his eyes wide, gazing up at the star littered sky.

On that particular night, two things were different. The first was the breathtaking show those silver specks put on for everyone. It was a meteor shower; the greatest meteor shower of the season to be specific. The second thing was the strange accompanying music.

Ryeowook pulled himself away from the light show to seek out the source of the beautiful music. That was a violin wasn’t it? He took a step forward, brows pulling together in confusion. Who played that well in their school? Ryeowook didn’t know many people yet, but he certainly wouldn’t have overlooked such a stunning musician…would he?

He turned slowly around, head tilting up. Standing proudly on top of the square rise of the roof was a dark silhouette. His body was slim and small, the outline of a violin evident. Ryeowook stared mesmerized by the sounds emitted by that instrument. In the background shooting stars flew past. Without any control over his body, Ryeowook lifted the camera up and snapped a picture.

The music abruptly stopped and the person was running, jumping down from the rise. Panicked, Ryeowook ran around, trying to locate the person. “I-I’m sorry!” he called, “I’ll delete it! I didn’t mean to take your picture I promise!” He circled around to the heavily moonlit portion of the rooftop, finding the young boy hurriedly packing the violin away. Ryeowook jogged up to him, “No, please don’t leave! You can watch the meteor shower!”

The person’s head shot up and his face was illuminated. His face was innocent and childish, long, fair locks framing his chubby-cheeked face. “U-Uh…I’m sorry,” he mumbled, lowering his head again.

Ryeowook blinked, covering his mouth in surprise. “So cute!” he exclaimed, crouching down and lifting the other boy’s face back up. He smiled at the childish face, pinching the cheeks excitedly. “So rubbery…how old are you?”

“Fourteen…”

“No way, you’re almost my age?” Ryeowook gasped, “you’re so lucky to have that face. I bet you’ll look young until you’re super old.” The book backed away from Ryeowook, looking somewhat scared. “Oh, I’m sorry! I didn’t introduce myself…I’m Kim Ryeowook. What’s your name?”

“H…Henry Lau,” he replied carefully.

“Are you a foreigner? I haven’t seen you around school before and I’m sure lots of people would be talking about you when you play such beautiful music.”

The boy, Henry, looked down, blushing in the moonlight. “I just transferred here tonight but I couldn’t sleep…and I always play my violin when I’m restless…sorry for disturbing you Kim Ryeowook-hyung.” He lowered his head respectfully.

How could this boy get any cuter? Ryeowook wanted to hug him, of course he didn’t. “I’ve never been called hyung before,” he admitted, smiling happily, “you’re too adorable Henry.” He patted the younger one’s head gently. “You can count on me if you have a hard time here! And come play your violin any time you want. I’ll listen,” he smiled.

Henry nodded, looking down shyly. “Thank you Ryeowook hyung…”


	3. Chapter 3

Ryeowook fixed Kyuhyun’s tie, straightening the silky material as he hummed a little tune. The taller of the two raised an eyebrow, hooking his fingers under Ryeowook’s chin and giving him a suspicious look. “Why are you so happy this morning?” he asked.

“No reason,” he replied, letting go of Kyuhyun’s tie and bounding towards the door, “let’s get going! We can’t miss general assembly or else they’ll be really mad!”

Kyuhyun trailed after his roommate, completely befuddled. What happened between last night and that morning? He shook his head warily. “As long as he’s happy I guess…”

They found their places in the assembly of students, standing straight backed. Ryeowook still couldn’t suppress the smile on his face. Last night’s meeting was too wonderful. He had always wanted to meet someone like Henry. The kid was precious and respectful…the only one that didn’t take advantage of him. Perhaps saying it like that made Ryeowook sound abused. Of course he didn’t mind helping out with odd jobs, really he didn’t. Being treated like a person was nice too sometimes though.

“Good morning my friends!” the student council president said into the microphone. His crescent shaped eyes were apparent, the dimple adding to his angelic smile. Rumor was the president used to be a total badass with bleached hair and everything. But nowadays he was back to black and wearing the uniform properly, not causing any problems. It was hard to imagine him as anything but the responsible student council president. Ryeowook knew he would never see the guy as anything less than that. Teukie-hyung was too…bright, to be badass.

The students all called back to their president, Park Jungsu, or more familiarly, Teukie-hyung. Everyone used that name to address him, even people in his grade.

“I’m happy everyone is so lively,” Teukie-hyung said, looking around at all the faces. “So we’re here this morning to welcome a new student. He’s from Canada and in the ninth grade. This boy is a musical genius with advanced training in both violin and piano. Please, everyone welcome your new classmate, Henry Lau!”

A young boy with the sweetest, most innocent face climbed up on stage, waving at the people. They all whooped and hollered at him, evidently having found a new idol. Ryeowook joined the calls only to try and make Henry feel welcome. The others were just yelling vulgarities.

Henry blushed and shuffled his feet. When he lifted his head again, he leaned over to the speaker and said, “Hello…I’m Henry. I hope we can be good friends.”

There were more cat calls but Henry apparently missed them all. Teukie-hyung, however, had not. The third year student shot death glares at all the obnoxious people. They shut their mouths immediately, lowering their head in repentance. Teukie-hyung smiled kindly again, all of the malice gone. “Henry will be studying mainly in the music department but don’t be afraid to approach him. As he already said, he would like to make good friends! Please welcome him with all your heart, okay?” Roars of approval rippled through the students. “Great! Then all of you are dismissed! Have a wonderful day!”

Everyone broke off, taking different paths to their classes. Ryeowook hurried through the crowd, only to be stopped by Kyuhyun. He looked up at the dark haired boy. “Hi Kyu,” he said.

“Where are you going? Our first period is this way,” Kyuhyun took Ryeowook’s hand, leading him in the opposite direction.

Ryeowook glanced back, seeing Henry talking to the president. He breathed a sigh of relief. If he was with Teukie-hyung everything would be alright. Ryeowook squeezed the taller boy’s hand, smiling as Kyuhyun turned his head. “Good morning! I forgot to tell you earlier,” he said.

“Good morning,” he replied, rolling his eyes, smirking.

“Hey Kyu, are you ready for the test?” Ryeowook asked, hurrying to walk beside his friend.

“It’ll be easy,” he answered, weaving through the bustling students. Ryeowook used the open path made by Kyuhyun, cutting through large groups. It took almost two minutes to get to the correct building and once they arrived there were students lined up all around. “You gotta be kidding me,” he growled.

“It’s alright,” Ryeowook insisted, “we’re in no hurry to get to class right?”

“You’re too passive Wookie,” Kyuhyun stated, pushing through the people, “that’s why you can never say ‘no’ when someone asks you to do a favor for them.”

They got to the front, stumbling into the air conditioned building. Kyuhyun led the way, bringing them down a hall and into a hidden stairwell leading to the second floor. He let go of Ryeowook’s hand. “Kyu, you ask me for favors while knowing that?”

Kyuhyun paused, turning around slightly. “I don’t see what you do for me as favors. More like…duty, or something,” he nodded, seeming to like that rationale.

“Duty?” Ryeowook repeated, following the other up the stairs.

“We’ll always be indebted to each other, don’t you agree? That’s what keeps us together, or at least I thought that way.”

“What happens when we’ve repaid every debt…?” Ryeowook shut his mouth tightly, forcing himself to stop blurting out every thought.

Kyuhyun shrugged casually. “We’re indebted to each other for life. I don’t know why you’re worried about something as ridiculous as that, Wookie.”

They reached the second landing, pushing the heavy door open. Very few people were roaming the hallway, most of them still caught in the traffic jam down below. Ryeowook walked side by side with Kyuhyun, resting his head slightly on the taller boy. “You’re right…nothing can tear us apart, right Kyu?”

“Mmhmm…nothing,” Kyuhyun murmured, putting his arm around Ryeowook’s shoulders and tugging him a bit closer.


	4. Chapter 4

At the academy, there was only one place to get away. Everyone who was anyone knew it, loved it really. The thing to note though was how many people were actually allowed to join in the dark fun. For most of the student body, this place’s existence was only a rumor, a dream if you will. But for the lucky ones, that dream had become a reality the day each one encountered “Kangin.”

He was an infamous student, the one responsible for opening and running the hottest hang out on campus. No one dared acknowledge him during school for fear of exposing the secret, but everyone knew who he was. Everyone wanted to get on his good side. Teukie-hyung may have had the respect of all the students, but Kangin had control of all the starved teenage boys. Anyway, let’s leave their story for another time and place.

Kyuhyun strode through the shadows of the school, following a well trodden path. His loose-fitting v-neck fluttered in the cool breeze, sending wonderful chills rolling through his body. It was too bothersome to carry a jacket where he was going. Kyuhyun found the break in trees, stepping lightly into the darkness.

After maybe five minutes, vibrations were rocking the dirt floor. Several more yards and Kyuhyun stopped, slamming his foot down three times. He stepped back, watching strobe lights and pounding music burst into the night with the lifting of false grass. An anxious fellow stood at the top of the stairs, looking Kyuhyun up and down. “Lookin’ hot as usual Kyu,” the guy remarked, shifting so the waiting boy could enter.

“Thanks,” he replied indifferently, hands in his pockets as he hopped down the steps into the underground club, “where is he?”

“Not even a ‘hey’ for me?” the boy muttered, shutting and locking the trap door, “I thought we were closer than that!” he slung an arm around Kyuhyun’s shoulders, following the younger boy down to the pit.

Kyuhyun ignored the arm around him, eyes searching the crowds of people. “Yeah, hey Eunhyuk,” he said blandly. Kyuhyun’s eyes landed on a tall, slender young man across the room. The latter was chatting with some other people, smiling and laughing. “Found him, catch ya later,” he patted Eunhyuk’s shoulder, disappearing into the sea of people.

“Kids are so impolite these days,” Eunhyuk scoffed, crossing his arms and walking around to sit at a booth.

“They’re just excited,” Kangin remarked, glancing at the second year who had taken a seat beside him. “Cho Kyuhyun especially, I hear that he’s had a rough time up until entering high school here.”

Eunhyuk watched with slight interest as the first year boy walked up to the angular, handsome second year and took the older one’s hand easily. “Then the kid must’ve been born with social skills ‘cause I’ve never seen Zhoumi warm up to someone so quickly.”

“Maybe so,” Kangin chuckled, taking a sip of his drink, “or maybe something more is going on between the two of them…?”

 

Kyuhyun grinned, pulling Zhoumi close to his own body on the heated dance floor. “So did you miss me?” he asked, lips pressing against the taller man’s ear as he wrapped his arms around that slim waist.

“Only a little…,” the older murmured, blushing and placing his long limbs around Kyuhyun’s shoulders. One leg slipped between the shorter, guiding their lithe bodies closer together. “But it didn’t seem like you missed me much at all…”

Kyuhyun kissed the other’s neck before looking up curiously. “What makes you say that?”

“You’re always hanging around Kim Ryeowook. Don’t you like him?” Zhoumi spoke in an uncomfortable voice, though he continued swaying eagerly against Kyuhyun. The question was true and the worry was real, but that couldn’t stop him from wanting to be near the younger boy. He had never felt so attached to someone before and it was _nice_ having that someone wanting him mutually.

Kyuhyun shrugged. “He’s a really old friend of mine. But I don’t know if you should say I _like_ him.” He pressed a kiss to Zhoumi’s jaw, saying, “I’m not really into cute guys. I like ones who can make my heart beat faster, guys like you.”

Zhoumi looked away, embarrassed. “Well I’m glad?” he murmured, pushing closer to Kyuhyun. Their skin was sticking to one another from the suffocating heat but neither cared. Freedom felt too good. Being students of such a prestigious place really took its toll. The very fact that students would camp out underground simply to get away from the pressures of school meant something.

Even the nerd Kyuhyun had succumbed to the unconditional temptations of KUG – a nickname for the underground hangout. After nearly a month of classes, the boy was about ready to jump out a window. The work never ceased and the teachers never slowed. It had become something of a machine, Kyuhyun being the integral unit for success. He hadn’t been able to handle the pressure any longer, but then Kangin appeared.

The third-year offered him a free pass to join the KUG scene after seeing how stressed out the poor freshman was. Kyuhyun hadn’t even hesitated, willing to try anything that would relieve the crushing weight for a few moments.

But there he was, three months later and addicted. Kyuhyun spent every spare night dancing at KUG, with Zhoumi when possible. Normally the older boy was around so it was that much better. He loved feeling that slender body grinding against his and that lovely face centimeters away. It was the best part of attending the academy. If it weren’t for Zhoumi’s presence Kyuhyun was pretty sure he would’ve been stuck taking care of Ryeowook forever. 

Who wanted that? Kyuhyun sure didn’t.

***

Ryeowook smiled awkwardly at his classmates. “Guys…Heechul-hyung…you really shouldn’t be doing that to Henry. He’ll get scared you know….” He gazed uneasily at the way Sungmin, Heechul and Donghae crowded around the terrified ninth grader. They were all eyeing the poor child like he was prey and they were vultures, quite the shudder-inducing sight.

Henry looked up, eyes misty with scared tears. He slipped out of the triangular human barrier, stumbling up to Ryeowook and latching onto the older boy. “Ryeowook-hyung!” Henry cried, voice muffled in his senior’s blazer.

Donghae crossed his arms, leaning back against the piano bench. “Oh, so that’s why you wanted us to back off, Wookie. You wanna keep the little guy all to yourself, huh?” He smiled playfully, eyes glittering gently.

“No that’s not it!” Ryeowook argued meekly, patting Henry’s back comfortingly. “We just met when he first got here and bonded some. I said he could come to me whenever he needs help…and well,” he waved his hand at the three boys, “this counts, right?”

Heechul flipped his hair, glowering. “ _Please_ , we weren’t even touching him. I only wanted to see if he was as attractive as me.”

“I wanted to see if he could join our mission,” Sungmin piped up. “The student council has been playing with the idea of more idols, you know. Teukie-hyung is all about trying to keep the students rational in this desolate place.”

“Yes I know, but telling someone to just…,” Ryeowook shook his head rapidly, “maybe in a next year. Henry is too young to be a part of that stuff.”

“Who says?” Sungmin argued, pouting. “He’s cute enough and he’s got talent. There’s nothing stopping him.” The dark haired boy pointed accusingly at Henry’s backside. “See? He’s already good at it!” Donghae waved his hand, silently seconding the notion. Heechul was ignoring the on-goings, absorbed in some out of place hair.

“This doesn’t count,” Ryeowook mumbled, frowning, “he’s just scared.”

“Pfft, whatever,” Sungmin snorted, throwing his head to the side.

Ryeowook sighed, ruffling Henry’s hair. “Why don’t you all go to class now? I know Heechul-hyung has clean up duty today and Donghae has to supervise the Dance Club practice. Minnie, don’t you have some errand to run for Teukie-hyung…?”

The trio muttered their own excuses, shuffling out of the room anyway. Ryeowook smiled, sighing softly. Those three were such a hassle…but they were good people. He knew that much that from the few months they had all known each other. Sungmin could be odd and pushy but in the end he was still a good person. Donghae was always nice, if not a bit weak to teasing. Heechul was too caught up in himself to be anything more than a slight annoyance; one that Ryeowook didn’t particularly mind.

“It’s okay Henry, they left already,” he cooed.

Henry sniffled and then looked up. “Thank you Ryeowook-hyung. I’m sorry…I don’t usually get like this.” He pulled away from the older boy, head lowered a bit. “They just came out of nowhere though and started asking questions and staring. I didn’t know what to do because they were all so handsome or cute or beautiful…,” Henry shook his head, cheeks coloring, “I felt embarrassed being so close to good-looking hyungs.”

“It’s alright,” Ryeowook assured, pinching Henry’s cheek and smiling. “Once you get to know them you’ll realize they aren’t all that scary or attractive,” he winked teasingly, catching a spark of laughter in the younger boy’s eyes.

“Hey Ryeowook-hyung, do you want to hear one of my favorite pieces?” Henry picked up the violin, looking eagerly at his senior.

“Sure, who’s it by?” He sat down on one of the chairs in the practice room.

“Mozart,” the young boy murmured, eyes falling upon the glossy instrument’s fine strings. He ran the bow across them, delving into a gentle piece.

Ryeowook watched in amazement as the classical piece came to life, sending a flurry of images through the listener’s mind. The produced sounds became a film playing out the age of cordial invitations and ladies and gentlemen. Rich colors painted the backs of Ryeowook’s eyelids, trapping his mind in the breathtaking scenes. There was no escape, no urgency for escape. He would have willingly stayed in the fantasy for eternity, drifting among the silky notes and pictures of long since past. It was unfathomable how a man-made instrument could create such heart-wrenching sounds.

Henry peered at Ryeowook when the song ended, trying to see his hyung’s reaction. It didn’t take much concentration to decipher the look of utter awe. Ryeowook staggered up to Henry, touching the violinist’s hand absently. “That was beautiful! I’ve never heard something so moving before…,” he smiled, “I’m so happy that I met you.”

“Thank you Ryeowook-hyung,” Henry replied, returning the smile tentatively.

“Just call me Wookie,” he stated, chuckling, “you don’t have to be so formal.”

Henry smiled wider. “Oh! Okay Wookie-hyung!”

“Ah…I meant—,” Ryeowook gave up after seeing the slowly approaching confusion in the younger one’s eyes, “never mind. That’s alright.”

 


	5. Chapter 5

Kyuhyun looked up from the book he was reading. His roommate closed the door softly behind him, locking it. The gentle boy removed his blazer, smiling happily at nothing in particular. “What’s got you so happy today, Wookie?” Kyuhyun asked, closing the book and pushing himself up to a sitting position on the top bunk.

“What’s wrong with smiling for no reason?” Ryeowook replied, unbuttoning his shirt.

“Well everything has a reason,” he snorted, swinging his legs over the edge and leaning forward, “So tell me, tell me, did you cheat on me or something?” Kyuhyun laughed, lips curving in an infamous smirk.

Ryeowook looked alarmed, fingers slipping from the buttons, dark brown bangs flying up. “No! Of course not…I mean…what do you mean cheat on you? I would never replace you.” He blushed. “You’re the only one I would ever open my heart to, Kyu.”

The black haired boy gazed with a mixture of indifferent emotions, all of which was missed by the red faced youth. Kyuhyun prodded Ryeowook’s shoulder with one foot, getting the latter’s attention. “I know already, dummy,” he said, masking the coldness of his former expression.

“I’m glad!” Ryeowook smiled brightly, naively.

Kyuhyun flopped back down on his mattress, opening the book once more. “Go to sleep soon, okay? It’s already late and we have a lot of tests tomorrow.”

“Mm-hmm,” Ryeowook mumbled, pulling on sweats and a long sleeve shirt. He peered up at his roommate one more time, feeling as if there was more to say. Something was hanging in the air between them but he wasn’t sure what. “…what’s that book for?” Ryeowook asked lamely.

“A history of mathematics,” Kyuhyun answered flatly, flipping a page in the slim novel.

Ryeowook nodded slowly, a bit disappointed. “Oh…well, alright. I hope it’s not too bad,” he made one last attempt at conversation, hoping Kyuhyun took the bait.

“It’s not. Go to bed already Wookie,” he sighed, half-lidded eyes scanning line after line in the text. He peered at Ryeowook from the corner of his eye, smiling faintly. “If you don’t wake up on time how do you expect me to wake up on time, hmm?”

“Ah, that’s true!” Ryeowook said as he disappeared from sight, lying down on the bottom bunk. “Sorry for staying up longer than usual. I won’t wake up late I promise, Kyu.” Perhaps that strange feeling was all a misunderstanding. They were perfectly fine with one another.

Nothing had changed in the past ten years so Ryeowook’s worry was definitely pointless. Obviously there were only good feelings between them. Yes, because Kyuhyun had promised from a long time ago that him and Ryeowook would be the closest. No one could step between them. Their bond was eternal.

Kyuhyun silently shut the book in his hand, eyes drifting aimlessly around the barren room. It was a prison, a place that trapped him in the past. Who could ever _want_ to be stuck in memories for a lifetime? His pitiful wish had become simply to break out, leave behind every horrible, repeated scenario. The very sight of that boy who slept below him sent sickening shudders through his heart. Ryeowook was the source of all those resentful chains. He held Kyuhyun back with his constant reminders of promises and “forever”. It was impossible to walk away from the child though. He was too weak, too useless. The second Kyuhyun took a breather Ryeowook was getting into trouble with something or other. There was never a time for Kyuhyun to _just_ be Kyuhyun. It would always be Kyuhyun the Protector of Ryeowook.

Every time he pressed a kiss to that ignorant brat’s lips, the acid in his stomach bubbled. He hardly did such intimate things for pleasure. When they kissed that was the only time the kid stopped talking. It was a matter of sanity. Kyuhyun could never actually _feel_ for such a bothersome person. He wanted nothing to do with him, and yet he had gotten stuck with that fate.

Why couldn’t his destiny be with Zhoumi? There was so much chemistry there, so much delicious thrill that Kyuhyun knew he would never get tired of it. His chest never thrummed with life when in the presence of Ryeowook. What he had with Zhoumi was greater than anything else in his life! So why…why was Kyuhyun kept away by that aggravating nuisance? Why couldn’t he open his heart to Zhoumi?

Kyuhyun sat up in bed. Really, why couldn’t he open his heart to the second-year? There was nothing stopping hm when he ignored the chains and slipped past the naïve Ryeowook. In secrecy, he could play a free man with all the rights to feeling for others.

A smile spread across his face, heart beating faster. Did this mean he could possibly get away from _that?_ He could cheat fate? Kyuhyun stifled the ecstatic laughs daring to burst from his lips. This was a chance, after ten years, he would finally get a taste of freedom.

Silently, in the same manner as he had done night after night, climbed down from bed and left the dorm room. A phone was clasped in his hand, wincing under the pressure by which its owner squeezed.

He ducked into the empty bathroom, making a call to Zhoumi. Surely the other boy was at KUG. Kyuhyun just hoped he could hear the ringing of a phone. After what felt like a long time, there was a greeting on the other end, “Kyuhyun?”

“Yeah, it’s me,” he replied, loving the way that voice uttered his name, “You at KUG tonight?”

“No…I have exams tomorrow,” Zhoumi murmured sweetly, “what’s up?”

Kyuhyun leaned against a wall, playing with the hem of his t-shirt. It was silent in the dark bathroom except for a soft whirring of running water pipes and pressure controls. “I wanted to see you…do you have the time?”

“Oh…well I suppose I could take a break,” Zhoumi answered, “it’s rare for you to call me so I should assume that something important is happening…?”

“Yeah, I think it is at least,” he said, a bright grin lighting his features. “Meet me in the back of the Honors Dorm.” After getting confirmation, Kyuhyun ended the call and hurried out of the bathroom, snaking down the moonlit hall towards a discreetly marked stairwell at the end of the way.

The Honors Dorm was exclusively for members of the student government (StudGov), members of influential academic organizations, and anyone in the 99th percentile in their third year of the high school division. This system seems fair from an outsider’s perspective but in reality the students in the highest percentile were already members of StudGov and/or a member of an academic organization. Therefore, the number of students occupying the Honors Dorm was presently twenty, perhaps even less. Teukie-hyung lived there, along with Vice President Yunho, Secretary Yesung – a nickname, Treasurer Hangeng, and the Historian Shindong.

So why had Kyuhyun chosen such a dangerous place to meet Zhoumi? It was a symbol, a personal dare. He wanted to test the limits of contained freedom. He wanted to see how far he could push not just himself but everyone in the school. But most of all, he wanted to demonstrate the seriousness of his actions with Zhoumi. Kyuhyun needed to convince himself that this was real, that it was more than simply breaking away from Ryeowook.

You see, Zhoumi wasn’t just any old person. There was chemistry between them, something that Kyuhyun didn’t want to take for granted by being obsessed with getting back at his oldest companion. That was why he would take risks for Zhoumi from the very beginning. This was the greatest act of sincerity Kyuhyun could think of.

The older boy was already standing around the shadowy parts of the Honors Dorm. He watched his breath disperse before him in the autumn chill. Kyuhyun strode up to him, thin pajamas fluttering. “Zhoumi,” he called quietly.

Kind eyes flitted up, sparkling with delight when they met Kyuhyun’s gaze. “Kyu…what did you have to talk to me about?”

Firmly, the younger boy took Zhoumi’s hands, tightly holding the cold fingers. “I know we haven’t known each other for long, but I’ve never been happier around someone. You’re special to the me right now and I don’t want to regret anything with you. That’s why please be mine Zhoumi.”

 


	6. Chapter 6

“Sungmin…I don’t really want to do this…,” Ryeowook said uneasily. The other boy was dragging him towards the auditorium, ignoring all of his partner’s words. “Really, this has never been my sort of thing…maybe we should choose something else…?”

“Stop being a wuss, Wookie,” Sungmin barked, turning an annoyed glare on the anxious boy. He pushed the door to the auditorium open, pulling Ryeowook in behind him. “Teukie-hyung said we need to get involved and this is the coolest thing I could find. Otherwise I’ll sign us up for cooking club and people will keep grabbing your butt when you bend over to take things out of the oven—”

“—Okay, okay!” Ryeowook exclaimed, covering Sungmin’s mouth. “Don’t say that so loud,” he mumbled, flushed and keeping his hand over the darker haired boy’s lips. The memory of how many hands “accidentally” touched his behind sent shudders through the poor first year.

Sungmin struggled to move Ryeowook’s hand away, wrestling with the latter’s grip without much success. The kid looked sort of weak but it must’ve been a trick. Then again, it wasn’t that hard to believe that Ryeowook would have strength in his fingers. Pianists had some scary hand muscles.

“You two over there, what are you doing?” someone called sternly. The pair froze, immediately separating and stumbling to straight postures. Ryeowook was the first to bow, followed quickly by Sungmin. “Stop messing around and get over here,” the voice sighed.

They stumbled down the stairs, joining a group of darkly dressed students sitting around the seats closest to the stage. A few looked up at their arrival, one of them being a brighter character. He waved at Sungmin and Ryeowook, smiling openly.

Ryeowook nodded at the cheery student before sitting down and verbally apologizing to the one standing on the stage. “Sorry for the disturbance, sir,” he said, head lowered.

“It’s alright, just don’t yell in an auditorium. Sound travels very well in here.” The person speaking was a student. Sungmin nudged Ryeowook, eyeing the figure oddly. The one in question noticed the questioning looks, saying, “There is an advisor but he’s out right now. I’m the president of Tech Crew, Yesung.” He handed the two of them registration papers and calendars. “We just finished introductions so please tell all of us what your name is and what grade you’re in.”

Ryeowook contained his excitement at meeting Yesung, but not very well. He clenched and unclenched his hands, eyes spinning with pure awe. Sungmin slammed an elbow into the other’s ribs, shooting him a warning glare. Ryeowook fumbled for words, face reddening more. “Oh, sorry, I’m Kim Ryeowook, a first year. It’s nice to meet all of you!”

“AH!!” the friendly dark person exclaimed standing and pointing. “It’s another freshman! You’re not alone Mir!” the boy grinned at the frowning youth sitting beside him.

“Shut up,” the one called Mir muttered, arms crossed about his chest.

“I’m Lee Sungmin, also a first year,” Sungmin introduced, bowing slightly and smiling in that perfectly adorable way. “I hope all of us can get along well.”

“Alright, so do all of you know what Tech Crew is?” Yesung asked, cutting right to the chase. Some nodded but the three freshmen shook their heads no. The President nodded once in understanding. “This club consists of all the people who make a stage production work. We control the lights, sounds, curtains and anything else you can think of, except for the actors. There are a lot of things to learn while in this club like how to handle a sound board, checking microphones, directing spotlights, shifting stage lights, and moving play set pieces.”

Ryeowook’s mouth formed a small O-shape as his eyes glittered with interest. He definitely wanted to learn more about this club. It was amazing to know that a school would let students handle something so difficult. Plus, Yesung was president! Everything became ten times better when you could be near the object of your admiration.

“Well then,” Yesung looked around at the club members, flashing a faint smile, “our first production is _Phantom of the Opera._ Are all of you familiar with it?” Excited replies flew at the club president who in turn offered a slightly weary curve of lips. “Good, well check out those calendars and mark which days you will be able to attend. If you’re going to be here for the show nights then circle all of them because it would be hazardous if your important job wasn’t filled for the performance. However on the days where we’re working on building the play sets, it’s alright not to come regularly.” Yesung checked his watch and then looked back up at the members. “I want those registration forms back as soon as possible, understood? The meeting is adjourned for today. Thank you for coming,” he tilted his head politely and went about collecting all the extra papers.

Ryeowook and Sungmin turned to each other, beaming expression plastered on both of their faces. The registration papers were wrinkling in their tight grips. “So cool,” Ryeowook said between gritted teeth.

“Uh-huh,” Sungmin agreed, head flying up and down enthusiastically. “Let’s go look up videos of the musical! I bet we could get a better idea of what it’s about!”

The loud, outgoing person from earlier patted the boys on their shoulders, grinning. “Sounds like you two have a lot of plans. Would you mind including our little Mir?” He pulled an irritated looking boy, the same one from before, over, practically shoving him at the pair. “You’re all first years! Stick together okay?”

Ryeowook offered his hand to Mir. “Hi, do you want to watch performance videos of _The Phantom of the Opera_ with us?”

The cool boy shrugged. “Sure.”

“Ah, okay, then we’ll meet in the outdoor commons,” Sungmin said, standing, “I’ll grab my laptop and go to see you guys alright?”

They nodded, watching Sungmin jog towards the exit of the auditorium.


	7. Chapter 7

Sungmin relocked his dorm room, laptop strapped to his shoulder. Was it strange that he enjoyed being seen as a couple when with Ryeowook? He wasn’t positive if he was gay or bi or whatever, but did it really matter? There was something strange happening to his heartbeat. Whenever the younger boy was around, Sungmin’s heart played an irregular tune. It was sort of nice but also weird. He hadn’t quite decided which one dominated.

Before Sungmin could take even a few steps down the hall, he spotted the last person he wanted to see. It was the devil himself, Cho Kyuhyun. Sungmin stifled an annoyed sigh. He really didn’t like that guy. No matter how much he tried – and so what if he didn’t try that hard – that sharp-tongued youth only knew how to get on other people’s nerves. How Ryeowook ever dealt with someone like that was a mystery. Sungmin had to give the kid props if he could be friends with such an irritating personality for so many years.

Then something struck the cute boy. Who was that person walking with Kyuhyun? Sungmin treaded carefully eyes skimming over Kyuhyun’s company slowly. The boy wore a second-year tie and had a sort of odd grace with those long limbs. He appeared to be slimmer than Kyuhyun, with angular but somehow softer features. Perhaps it was personality shining through, but Sungmin didn’t know.

“Oh look, it’s the stupid-bunny,” Kyuhyun remarked, smirking at Sungmin as he passed by.

“Off guard duty today, hound?” Sungmin bit back, eyes locked on the entwined fingers of the hateful boy and the graceful second-year.

“Who is that?” the taller, older boy inquired, looking at Sungmin curiously.

Kyuhyun simply shook his head, tugging on the other’s hand gently. “No one important. Let’s get going or else we’ll be late to the Math Team meeting.”

“Mm, you’re right,” the boy replied, quickly lengthening his strides.

Sungmin cocked an eyebrow at the display but said nothing of it. Who was he to mess around in someone else’s life, especially the life of someone he disliked so much? If Kyuhyun was doing something with that tall boy, it was none of Sungmin’s business.

 

Kyuhyun and Zhoumi entered the former’s room, gathering some supplies before heading over to practice for an upcoming match with another school’s Math Team. The younger one stuffed a large textbook into his messenger bag, huffing loudly.

“What’s the matter Kyuhyun?” Zhoumi asked, leaning over his boyfriend’s shoulder.

“That kid just really pisses me off,” he sighed, glaring hatefully at the abused bag. “Every time I see him I have the urge to kick his face.”

Zhoumi’s eyes widened in surprise and maybe a little intrigue, “Did something happen between the two of you? He seemed nice enough, except for the dog reference.”

“It doesn’t really have to do with this incident,” Kyuhyun murmured, straightening and leading his new boyfriend towards the door. “We met orientation night at the dorm and he just…”

 

_Orientation Night – A Few Months Prior…_

 

_Kyuhyun and Ryeowook shuffled down the staircase to the main floor lounge where every resident had been called. There were roughly one hundred students filling up the expansive room, all of them sitting or standing, trying to keep a personal bubble._

_“Don’t wander off,” Kyuhyun murmured close to his friend’s ear, softly touching the slender boy’s arm,_

_“I won’t Kyu,” Ryeowook replied, smiling innocently as his eyes wandered around the faces. “There are so many of us living here…I wonder if everyone is nice like you,” he chuckled a bit, eyes glinting happily._

_“Don’t get your hopes up Wookie, I’m an angel,” Kyuhyun stated casually, sitting down on the edge of a couch and pulling Ryeowook down beside him, “there’s no one nicer than me.”_

_“Get your foot off my jacket.”_

_Kyuhyun blinked, looking down in surprise. “Oh I didn’t see you sitting there,” he remarked, moving his foot off the dark haired boy’s pink jacket._

_“Not even gonna apologize?” the cute freshman demanded, crossing his arms and glaring up at the unremorseful boy._

_At this point, Ryeowook had leaned over Kyuhyun’s lap, gazing down at the source of conflict. “What’s going on, Kyu?”_

_Suddenly, the pink jacket fellow clambered to his knees, gaze fixed on Ryeowook. “Oh wow, you’re pretty cute. I didn’t think there were any decent looking people living outside of the Honors Dorm.” He smiled at Ryeowook. “I’m Sungmin, what’s your name?”_

_“Ryeowook…,” he replied, blushing at the perfect expression of happiness on the boy’s face. Without ill-intentions, Ryeowook had come to believe the same thing as Sungmin. There were few attractive boys at the school. The only ones lived in secret in the Honors Dorm and therefore were inaccessible on a living together basis. At least, that’s what he told Kyuhyun when interrogated later that night._

_Kyuhyun grimaced, putting an arm between the two adorable students. “Wandering off doesn’t just mean physically. You shouldn’t be talking to such weird people, Wookie.”_

_“How am I weird?” Sungmin demanded, inching closer to Kyuhyun’s face hostilely. He jabbed a finger at the deep voiced young man. “I’m not the one going around stomping on other people’s stuff without concern.”_

_“For such a stupid looking rabbit you sure bark a lot,” Kyuhyun said flatly, mouth a straight line as he returned the angry glare given to him. Sungmin opened his mouth but then closed it again. “Oh? Ran out of rebuttals already,_ Sungmin _?”_

_“Hey, hey, don’t tease him too much.” Ryeowook said, touching Kyuhyun’s chest gently, “we’re here to make friends aren’t we?”_

_“Anyone that’s touchy about their feelings shouldn’t try speaking to me then.”_

_Ryeowook sighed. “Sorry Sungmin, he’s a little stubborn so please bear with us. In reality Kyu is an incredibly—!”_

_Abruptly, a person was staggering towards Ryeowook, back first. Kyuhyun grabbed his friend, jerking him out of the way and getting slammed by the unbalanced fool. He groaned, shoving the person off as quickly as he could. “Hey Wookie are you okay?” Kyuhyun grunted, wincing and looking around._

_On the floor, there were two slender boys in a tangled pile. The one on bottom had a hand on Ryeowook’s lower back, seemingly thrown there from trying to catch the fallen teen. Sungmin’s head was turned towards Ryeowook, staring at him in concern. “Hey, hey, are you okay?” he asked, nudging the other boy’s cheek with his own._

_“Mm…yeah, I think so…,” Ryeowook mumbled in a soft voice, squirming as he tried to get up. “Kyuhyun you really threw me—”_

_A swarm of residents surrounded Sungmin and Ryeowook, thoroughly pushing Kyuhyun out of the way. They grinned and blushed and eagerly worked to help the adorable pair. There were questions of names and grades and everything else._

_Truly, two things were learned that night. The first was Kyuhyun’s hate for that stupid bunny. The second was the birth of Ryeowook and Sungmin’s fan service._


	8. Chapter 8

Yesung placed his hand on the wood cutting table, sternly looking at everyone. “This is not a toy. Do not leave your fingers, arms, hands or any other body part here when someone is working or when a piece of machinery is turned on. There have been many accidents and I don’t want to be responsible for telling your parents that you’ll be coming home with one less finger.” He turned his back, walking forward to continue the tour.

Before any sort of set building could be done all of the students were required to go on a tour of the auditorium and surprisingly there were more components than you would think. They had just finished exploring the Tech Shop and were entering the stage area.

Ryeowook slipped his hand into Sungmin’s, catching the latter off guard. He raised an eyebrow at the initiator but said nothing. “I’m trying to see what you consider fan service,” Ryeowook remarked, laughing quietly.

Sungmin rolled his eyes, grinning and undoing their fingers. He pulled Ryeowook’s arm so it wrapped around his. “You gotta be cute Wookie,” Sungmin winked.

“Oh…,” he whispered, hugging the other’s arm tightly and burrowing his head into the shoulder, “like that, Sungmin?”

“What are you guys doing?” Mir interrupted, eyeing the two of them weirdly.

Ryeowook scrambled away from Sungmin, blushing. “We were just playing around.”

Sungmin smirked, running over and hugging Ryeowook’s waist. The expression shifted so his eyes were large and his lips formed a pout. He squeezed the other boy sweetly, saying, “That’s mean Wookie! How can you say that we were just playing around? I think you’re the cutest…,” Sungmin nuzzled Ryeowook’s neck.

Mir covered his face, eyes wide and confused. “Oh…I didn’t know…sorry…,” he waved his hands, going on to say, “I’m not a homophobe or anything, I swear! I just didn’t expect…well, maybe a little…but anyway that’s not the point! You two are alright together.” Quickly, the boy ran off to catch up with the departing tour group.

“You make things so difficult Minnie,” Ryeowook sighed, hands placed carefully on the huggable boy’s hips, “You made Mir misunderstand...that’s another person now.”

“You don’t mind that much right?” Sungmin loosened his grip on Ryeowook, eyes sparkling with laughter.

Ryeowook shook his head, a bit reluctantly. He really didn’t mind fan service _that_ much. It was weird and sort of awkward at times but in the end, they both had a little fun. The atmosphere around school was always so strict but when they were doing stuff for the students everyone seemed to loosen up. That’s probably why Teukie-hyung supported such an odd thing. And since everyone saw Ryeowook and Sungmin on a different plane, they never dared to do anything more than “accidental touching”. But hey, that was unavoidable no matter where you were, right? “I think we’re doing something nice for the students,” Ryeowook replied. “And this way I think Kyuhyun has more time to study since he doesn’t have to walk with me to most of my classes. Did you know that he actually spends a lot of time reading or doing homework? It’s really cool, I think…”

Something flickered in Sungmin’s eyes but it soon vanished. He nodded slightly. “The hound sounds like a nerd. Why did he have to walk you to class before?”

Ryeowook’s expression filled with warmth, eyes softening until they appeared to be the sweetest chocolate. “He’s always protected me because in our old schools I would be harassed a lot since…well,” he looked down at himself and shrugged, “it’s sort of obvious…. But Kyuhyun always did his best to make sure nothing happened to me. That’s why he’s so serious about making sure I don’t get into any trouble. Kyuhyun’s such a kind person, don’t you agree?”

“That hound is the farthest thing from kind,” Sungmin snapped, frowning in an attempt to mask the vehemence that had slipped into his voice. It wasn’t his business…it wasn’t his business…it wasn’t his business….

“I guess you would see it like that Minnie,” Ryeowook laughed. “Sorry that he’s so hard on you. I’m sure it’s nothing personal…probably….”

“Hey what are you two doing?” Yesung called, waving his hand for them to rejoin the group. “Don’t wander off or else you’ll get lost!”

“Ah, sorry!” Ryeowook answered, disentangling himself from Sungmin and taking the latter’s hand. “We’re coming!” He turned to Sungmin, grinning, “Let’s hurry, Minnie!”

Sungmin trailed after Ryeowook, eyes casting down to their perfectly laced fingers. For some reason, for whatever heinous reason, Sungmin found himself loathing that haughty hound more and more the longer he held his partner-in-fan service’s hand.  


	9. Chapter 9

Kyuhyun didn’t bother sitting up when his roommate entered their room. Ever since things had started between himself and Zhoumi, whenever he laid eyes on Ryeowook he felt like curling his lip in disgust. Those protruding cheekbones, that fading hay colored hair, those blank black eyes…Kyuhyun didn’t like any of it. That’s why all he could do was avoid looking at the boy. There was nothing beautiful about him, so why did everyone fawn over him? How could anyone see such features as lovely? Were they all blind to Zhoumi who was hundreds of times more attractive than Ryeowook?

“I’m back,” the kind child announced, glancing up at Kyuhyun. There was no return look, just a brief flick of a wrist. Ryeowook furrowed his brow but said nothing about the dismissive attitude. It wasn’t new to see Kyuhyun in a dark mood. He had so much stress anyone could understand why he might be cold at times, especially Ryeowook. The latter had often brushed off the actions, thinking little to nothing of them. “Sorry for coming back so late.”

And that voice. That horrible, high pitched sound made Kyuhyun want to scream. It wasn’t worth the praise it received. What was so _cute_ about a boy who failed to properly hit puberty? Kyuhyun didn’t understand why people weren’t crazy over Zhoumi’s voice. Now that was something worth listening to. Those tender, smooth vocals were to die for and Kyuhyun nearly wanted to. If he could choose which one to listen to…well the winner was obvious, right? He had spent too many years and too much of his life around that irritating noise!

“How long have you been studying?” Ryeowook asked softly, leaning over the edge of his roommate’s higher bunk.

“A couple of hours,” he replied calmly, the hateful shouting in his brain perfectly masked. This was nothing new. He had learned over the years to hide the boiling emotions. It wasn’t particularly to protect Ryeowook as it was to keep the kid naïve. Kyuhyun had no desire to see Ryeowook open his eyes to the world. The more that annoyance knew, the worse it would be for everyone.

There was only one person Kyuhyun believed should never become knowledgeable and that was Ryeowook. He was scared to imagine what sort of havoc could be wreaked by an innocent child being let into a world like theirs. What sort of person would he become? Would Ryeowook start preaching his beliefs? Or maybe his heart would darken until there was no way to save him, and obviously Kyuhyun would be the one saving him.

He certainly didn’t want to deal with that mess. Didn’t Ryeowook put enough pressure on him as it was? Why did he have to deal with a _aware_ child? It would be too much…Kyuhyun just couldn’t handle that; he didn’t _want_ to handle that. Ryeowook wasn’t precious enough. He wasn’t Zhoumi – someone Kyuhyun would undoubtedly care for. The simple idea of that beautiful young man needing him sent wonderful shivers rolling down Kyuhyun’s spine. He _loved_ the possibility of someone so lovely pining after him. Ryeowook was not on that list of lovely people.

Ryeowook brushed a few stray hairs out of Kyuhyun’s face, smiling as the taller boy’s dark eyes flitted over to him. “When we were little, you always got hair in your face too,” he commented, gentle gaze resting warmly on his best friend.

“Yeah I did,” Kyuhyun replied focus shifting back to the book in hand. “It’s pretty late. You should think about going to bed.”

“We haven’t talked much these past few days though…do you have any time?” He really hoped the answer was yes. It hadn’t occurred to Ryeowook until then how much he missed Kyuhyun’s deep voice. That beautiful sound always managed to lull him to a happier, abstracter place; a place far from the reality they resided in. Ryeowook hadn’t been stressed much but why did it matter? Anyone and everyone were allowed to enter their dream-like space whether or not the situation was dire. As for the cute fifteen year old, his wish was to visit that location once more, even for a short time.

Kyuhyun sighed softly, sitting up and hopping down from the top bunk. He pulled Ryeowook down onto the bottom bunk, tucking the boy into bed. “Only for a little while, okay?” Kyuhyun murmured, running his fingertips through the other boy’s feathery tresses.

“Thank you Kyu,” Ryeowook whispered, smiling faintly up at the more angular faced young man. He closed his eyes, feeling those light fingers trace his cheek and hair.

And then in the sweetest, dreariest voice, Kyuhyun began reciting the poem of a place only the two of them knew; the place that Kyuhyun had created for them at the age of five. It had grown more complex over the years but overall little had changed.

_“Take a deep breath,_

_Don’t dream of death,_

_Listen to my hushed voice,_

_As I offer you the choice,_

_Open and grassy,_

_Bright and blue,_

_Follow a white stream,_

_And you’ll see a dream,_

_Now open your eyes,_

_See the endless skies,_

_Purity and nothingness,_

_You and me,_

_Peer up at the stars,_

_For this world is ours…”_


	10. Chapter 10

Ryeowook studied the music score in his hand, contemplating what to do with it. He didn’t want to give the lyrics a weak instrumental. It deserved something more, something extra special. After all, this song was for the most important person to Ryeowook. It was originally his and the boy had no right to destroy the poem by slapping some halfway decent melody on to it.

He took a deep breath, carefully placing the sheets back onto the piano and laying his fingers upon the keys. Ryeowook murmured the lyrics under his breath, trying to feel what sort of tune best fit the words being sung.

_“Take a deep breath,_

_Don’t dream of death,_

_Listen to my hushed voice,_

_As I offer you the choice—”_

The piano student stopped, glaring inn irritation at the keys. That wasn’t right. Maybe piano wasn’t the best instrument. Maybe there was something better fit for this piece. Ryeowook clapped his hands, lips parting in realization. He collected the music scores in a messy pile, hurrying out of the room.

He was always around. Whenever Ryeowook was rushing to Tech Crew, he would hear the soft violin through the closed door of a practice room. It had become lovelier and lovelier with each passing day. The pieces were more complex or faster or slower or sweeter or sadder, but in the end the listener would feel a need to hear the end. That was the sort of violin he could play. It was the kind that left such a deep impression that every member of the audience fell irrevocably for those classical notes. Ryeowook was no different and if there were enough hours in a day he would choose to stay behind every day simply to keep the young violinist company as he played those varying songs.

 

Henry heard the practice room door open and he stopped playing, lowering the instrument pressing against his neck. A smile lit up the young boy’s face. “Wookie-hyung!” He set the violin down, running over to hug Ryeowook. “Where have you been lately? I missed you a lot!”

“Ah…I joined a club recently and there hasn’t been a lot of time to come over here,” Ryeowook explained, hugging Henry back. “The only time I can come to the Music Department is for class but then I have to leave fast. How have you been though?”

“Not bad,” Henry said, smiling sincerely, “I’ve just been practicing and stuff. There are a lot of competition pieces to learn. My instructor is really strict but I think he’s really a good musician so I don’t mind being pushed. What about you though, Wookie-hyung? You look tired.” He looked intently at Ryeowook, leaning up with wide eyes.

“I’m not used to doing club activities,” Ryeowook answered, patting Henry’s head, “so I’m a little worn out. What sort of pieces are you learning though? You shouldn’t push yourself too much!” He frowned at the ninth grader, pinching one soft cheek. “You’ll ruin your face that way. A bunch of wrinkles will appear and your eyes will have really dark bags.”

Henry’s face fell in horror and he quickly scrambled back, examining his face. “I don’t want to look old…but I guess looking a little older wouldn’t hurt. I’m tired of people saying I look like I’m twelve. It’s very upsetting,” he mumbled, pouting. Suddenly he caught sight of the papers clutched in his senior’s hand. “Are those music sheets? What are they for?”

Ryeowook blinked, remembering why he had come to see Henry. “Oh! I wanted to get your opinion on something I’m composing. I couldn’t get the melody right and I thought maybe you would be able to hear it through your violin…,” he blushed a bit, “that’s the reason I came here to be honest.”

“Don’t worry Wookie-hyung,” Henry said, pulling the older boy over to the piano bench and sitting down beside him. “I’m supposed to help my elders, right? What’s the piece like?”

Ryeowook didn’t even have to look at the paper to know the words. They had been engraved in his soul; it was the greatest poem to ever grace him. Perhaps it sounded cheesy, but it was what made Ryeowook feel like him and Kyuhyun were connected.

That poem spoke of a fantasy world where no one but the two of them existed. There were no such things like stress and death and interruptions. When their minds and hearts traveled to that realm there was nothing keeping them apart. It brought the warmest feeling to Ryeowook’s soul and whenever he was there with Kyuhyun, he could feel the same warmth filling the other as well. No one could hide from the truth in that place. At least, that’s how Ryeowook felt.

 

_“Take a deep breath,_

_Don’t dream of death,_

_Listen to my hushed voice,_

_As I offer you the choice,_

_Open and grassy,_

_Bright and blue,_

_Follow a white stream,_

_And you’ll see a dream,_

_Now open your eyes,_

_See the endless skies,_

_Purity and nothingness,_

_You and me,_

_Peer up at the stars,_

_For this world is ours…”_

“There’s a second and third verse,” Ryeowook said, glancing at Henry, “but for the time being I want to compose music for these words. Can you hear the song?”

Henry’s eyes were closed and his head bobbed subtly from side to side. Lips were slightly pursed in concentration. He carefully opened his eyes and said, “Only a bit…but I bet if we worked together, we could hear the full song Wookie-hyung. I feel like there’s a certain emotion missing from the lyrics…it’s like you haven’t deciphered the full meaning of it…or something like that.”

Ryeowook frowned, thinking carefully about the youth’s words. What was he missing in the oratory? Didn’t he know the full meaning of the poem though? It had been told to him for years…how could Ryeowook still be confused about the meaning of the poem...? “Are you positive Henry…? I mean…I’ve been listening to those words for a decade; I don’t think anyone could understand it better than me.”

“Hmm,” Henry paused, brows knit, “maybe it isn’t that you’re confused then. Maybe it’s that you know it too well. Maybe over the years those words have taken on a newer meaning…one that you don’t know about.”

“Well I didn’t write this,” he stated, “it’s my friend Kyuhyun’s piece. I just wanted to surprise him by giving it music.”

Henry smiled, “You should ask your friend Kyuhyun-hyung about it then! Maybe he doesn’t see it the same way you do. That could affect the feeling given off by the words.”

That was preposterous. They hadn’t changed one bit since they were kids, except for a few things. The poem couldn’t have been one of those shifts though…no way. It meant too much to their relationship right? So how Kyuhyun could be seeing it in a different light was a wonder to Ryeowook. “I…Just can’t imagine that Kyuhyun would change his perspective. Why would he do that Henry?”

The younger boy shrugged casually. “The core of things always stays the same. But over time the pieces surrounding the core shift and rearrange themselves, just like music. It’s still beautiful though, as long as the composer has kept the basic feelings intact.” Henry offered an encouraging smile. “Those words still carry the feeling of purity and freedom and being exclusively for two people, but the pieces surround it have shifted a lot. Well…this is how I see it. You don’t have to believe me Wookie-hyung, that is, if you don’t want to.”

“No…no,” Ryeowook shook his head, patting Henry’s back softly, “I’ll think about what you said…and I’ll talk to Kyuhyun about it when I get the chance.”

It didn’t hurt to confront Kyuhyun about the issue right? If it wasn’t resolved than Ryeowook would be stuck with an incomplete melody and the strange despair sinking deeper and deeper into the pit of his stomach.

 


	11. Chapter 11

“Are you sure you can handle this?”

Mir shot an angry look at his friend. “Of course I can. Stop getting in the way Joon!” he snapped, turning his back on the older boy and facing a patiently waiting Yesung. “Sorry Yesung-hyung, what were you saying about the electric saw?”

Joon put his hands up in surrender, walking off to join the group of boys sitting around a table on the other side of the Tech Shop. A game of cards was going on, all of them bent over their hands tensely. The two freshmen were standing around Mir though, watching their new found friend with anxious looks.

“Don’t cut towards yourself, always cut away and don’t leave anything hanging, understand?” Yesung stated seriously, goggles obscuring his eyes. “I’ll demonstrate.” He turned on the electric saw, filling the high ceiling room with a loud whirring noise. Ryeowook covered Sungmin’s ears and vice versa. They stared wide eyed as Yesung expertly cut a plank of wood in half. The third year StudGov member flicked the OFF switch and pulled his goggles up after carefully securing the saw again. “Do you think you can handle it, Mir?”

“Yeah,” the freshman gulped his face a bit pale. “Can you stick around though…?”

“Sure,” Yesung replied, shifting a bit so he was standing beside Mir instead of against the table. “So try cutting this,” the president placed a piece of wood in front of the saw. “Don’t rush, just do it precisely and safely.”

Mir nodded a bit, swallowing one more time and taking hold of the piece of machinery. Tentatively, he turned on the saw, practically jumping out of his skin when it started whaling. Yesung grabbed hold of the machine when Mir’s shock had forced it out of the younger man’s hands.

The president made a sound vaguely similar to a sigh. “Okay, let’s try later. For now we need to dictate who’s going to do what for the show. If there are any freshmen who want to learn about sound boards or lights must be taught as soon as possible, which means no set building.”

Ryeowook looked at Sungmin and when they came to a silent agreement, the latter snatched Mir’s hand, jerking it up as they did with their own arms. “All three of us want to learn sound board!” Sungmin stated firmly.

“What—,” Mir began but then someone was kicking him in the back of his knees, cutting him off abruptly.

Yesung either didn’t care or didn’t notice because he shrugged and looked at the trio. “Good, then all of you can learn how to operate the systems with Joon. He seems sort of incompetent but his specialty happens to be sound board. Please trust him thoroughly and listen to what he tells you.”

“Yes sir!” Ryeowook and Sungmin answered, standing straight and proud. Mir was doing something like a wave of surrender.

“Okay then kiddies,” Joon called, clapping his hands and slinging his arms around the three boys’ shoulders, “We’ll start by exploring the cat walk ‘cause that’s gotta be the coolest place ever.”

“Why didn’t we go during the tour then?” Ryeowook inquired.

“Too many people would equal too much weight,” he answered, “or something like that. I’m not too positive. Anyway, it’s a really awesome place to know about.”

They left the auditorium, walking down the tiled hallways of the building. There was a staircase to the right which they went up, continuing down the second floor corridor. Two closed doorways could be seen immediately leading to different storage rooms. During the tour they had seen what were in them but at that point Ryeowook couldn’t differentiate the nondescript doors.

Joon led the way further down the hall, muttering to himself about numbers. After passing three more doors he stopped, pushing open one of the many unmarked portals. He turned on a light, revealing a white, scarce room. A metal ladder was built on one plain wall leading up to a dark space. “Follow me,” Joon called, beginning to ascend the strange ladder.

Ryeowook grabbed Sungmin’s hand, looking at him worriedly. “This looks shady…”

“You mean this looks freaking awesome,” Sungmin replied excitedly as he squeezed and swung the other’s hand. “It’s like a spy movie or something! What kind of school has this?”

He sighed nervously, glancing up at the ladder one more time. “Well...I guess if you’re there…”

“That’s right!” Sungmin assured, grinning and tugging Ryeowook forward, “I’ll be right behind you. Don’t worry Wookie.”

“Hurry up you two!” Joon called down, leaning over the edge to look at them.

Ryeowook slowly grasped the metal bars, pulling himself up the ladder. “You’re still there right Minnie?” his voice trembled a bit, eyes focused heavily on the next bar.

“Where else would I be?” Sungmin snorted, hands on his hips as he watched Ryeowook climb. “You can do it Wookie, c’mon!"

Joon grabbed Ryeowook under his arms as the younger boy reached the top, pulling him over the edge. “You’re so slow,” the senior rolled his eyes, smiling teasingly at the boy.

“Sorry,” Ryeowook replied, half-smiling as he noticed the gleam of amusement in Joon’s gaze.

Sungmin appeared in the field of vision a few moments later, swinging over the ledge easily. “Nice Wookie, but next time be faster,” he scoffed, ruffling the other boy’s hair.

Joon walked into the dark, saying, “Follow my voice…and those little lights. I’ll tell you when we need to start crawling because it gets pretty narrow up here. Oh, and no loud noises. It’ll send really loud echoes through the area.”

“Okay,” the pair whispered, staying close to Joon’s back.

After a few seconds they stopped walking, seeing the older boy wave his hand for them to get on hands and knees. They played follow the leader through a narrow, claustrophobic space, feeling a sudden drop onto a slightly lower platform.

Ryeowook yelped, covering his own mouth quickly. He looked over the black railing and to his amazement saw the entire auditorium from a bird’s eye view. It was the perfect place to see the stage if there were a performance in progress. “Whoa…,” he breathed, stopping in his tracks to study the view.

“Pretty awesome,” Joon murmured, nudging Ryeowook. The latter nodded vigorously.

Sungmin placed his forearms on the lower railing, eyes trailing over to the astounded Ryeowook. Even in the dark those bright, sweet features still lit up the world around him. It was odd… _really_ odd to see someone surrounded by so many horrible things shining like the holy sun. Sungmin was sort of jealous, but more than that he was happy. Happy to be near someone who could retain innocence so well…

Ryeowook turned to Sungmin. “Isn’t it cool?” he whisper-yelled.

“Yeah…it is,” he returned, leaning against Ryeowook’s shoulder, eyes steadily on his thrilled companion. It was surely an amazing view…


	12. Chapter 12

Ryeowook didn’t want to enter his dorm room; he _really, truly_ didn’t want to go inside. That knot in his stomach kept tightening and there was no way to relieve it. No matter how many deep breaths he took or calming words he recited…the feeling wouldn’t vanish. Why was he so scared of talking to Kyuhyun about it? They were always open…Ryeowook shook his head. This was ridiculous. Kyuhyun had and would forever be the first person to completely be in Ryeowook’s heart. There was nothing to fear from someone so precious. How could he even think about distrusting his friend?

He placed his hand on the door knob, checking the time once more before pushing the wooden barrier open. “I’m back,” Ryeowook called, “Set building ran late today but I hope that you’re still awake Kyu…hyun…”

The top bunk was empty. In fact, Ryeowook was the only one in the room. Where was Kyuhyun? He checked the time again: 11 PM. Why wasn’t Kyuhyun home yet? Math Team practices only ran until nine at the latest. Oh no…was there some sort of resident meeting that Ryeowook forgot about? But Kyuhyun usually told him if there was something important like that to attend.

His heart was beating faster now, eyes flying around the scarcely decorated room. Ryeowook rushed over to his bed, seeing a folded note lying on the blankets. Immediately, the racing in his chest slowed and he unfolded the note.

_All-night study session_

_I’m sleeping over at a friend’s_

_Go to sleep early –Kyu_

Ryeowook sighed, relieved that Kyuhyun wasn’t hurt or off somewhere dangerous. It was just like that nerd to be doing crazy stuff like studying all night long. The knot in Ryeowook’s gut loosened, forcing him to look down. Why had it done that? Was he so happy to not be confronting Kyuhyun? Ryeowook frowned. “No…I trust Kyu…so why?”

He shook his head. There was something wrong with him recently. Maybe turning something so personal like their “place” into a music piece was wrong. Ryeowook changed into his pajamas, climbing into bed. Yeah…there was definitely something wrong. In the morning he would scrap the song.

***

Kyuhyun brought a drink over to the booth for Zhoumi who was sitting with Eunhyuk and Kangin. They were chatting idly, all of them looking up at Kyuhyun’s return. Zhoumi took the cold glass, kissing his boyfriend on the lips. “Thanks,” he murmured close to the younger man’s ear.

“You two sure have gotten cozy,” Eunhyuk remarked, watching the pair quietly flirt.

“Don’t be jealous Eunhyuk,” Kangin chuckled, sipping his drink, “you just wish you could’ve been with Zhoumi.”

The platinum blonde second year flushed, elbowing Kangin roughly. “Shut up you Widow!”

Kyuhyun looked up from kissing his boyfriend, raising an eyebrow at the insult. “What are you talking about?”

Kangin punched Eunhyuk’s shoulder and plastered a smile on his face for Kyuhyun. “Nothing kid. So how long have you and Zhoumi been dating now?”

The subject change wasn’t disputed. No one pushed Kangin about his personal life. If they did it usually resulted in being banned from KUG. Why? Well again, no one knew why, or maybe Eunhyuk did but he wasn’t about to spill anything. There were rumors about the third year, Kangin, but none had been verified. Someone said he and Teukie-hyung had been together before but that was impossible! Teukie-hyung and Kangin – what a mismatch, really, there was no way someone as straight laced as the StudGov president would be caught in a relationship with the creator of KUG.

“Probably a month now if we’re heading into November,” Kyuhyun replied, one arm thrown across Zhoumi’s slim shoulders.

“Oh wow, so long,” Kangin remarked, “I have to say Kyuhyun, I’m impressed that you got our Mimi to like you! He’s always been sort of guarded.”

Zhoumi frowned at the older boy. “Stop it Kangin! I…What’s wrong with waiting for the right person?” He flashed a quick smile at Kyuhyun. “I’m not wrong to think that, am I?”

“No,” Kyuhyun kissed the other fleetingly, “I feel the same way…I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Ugh, you two need to stop all that romantic stuff,” Eunhyuk scoffed, making a face at them. “This is KUG! Stop sitting around like old folk and start dancing!”

Kyuhyun exchanged a look with Zhoumi and then they were running off towards the dance floor together. Their fingers were interlaced, shoulders brushing as they disappeared into the blur of moving bodies.

***

Burning…so much burning… Electricity surrounded his heart, shocking and prodding the blood pumping organ. A layer of fire seared the skin that could not be seen. Every muscle contracted uncontrollably, playing puppet master to the young boy’s body. Colors burst against the back of his eyelids, creating the most horrid fireworks display. With each burst of neon came such unbearable pain, tears were forced from his eyes. On the surface his skin had grown clammy, soaking through his clothing and onto the much too warm blanket. His lower back arched off the bed as a spear of white hot pain cut down his spine. That poor, slender body rolled off the bed, bringing with it a tangle of blankets. He collapsed against the cool floors, fingers clawing at the fire wall capturing his heart.

Ryeowook didn’t even have the mind to curse to himself. The salty liquid pouring from his eyes stung his bitten and bleeding lip. He barely noticed though. Everything else had become far too unbearable. Ryeowook gasped quietly, chest rumbling as he dragged himself across the floor towards the plastic chest beneath his bed.

The fingers around his heart clenched as the fire doubled its efforts. He knocked the storage container over, clambering for the familiar bottle. It pressed against his palm and reluctantly Ryeowook pried his fingers from the sweat-drenched shirt in order to unscrew the cap. The covering fell to the ground, forgotten.

He counted out two pills, swallowing them dry. The effects weren’t fast enough. They needed to be faster. Ryeowook needed to feel the pain subside. His higher thinking slowly rose up through the smoke, now accompanying the shuddering of his body. Ryeowook gritted his teeth, sorrowful, blurred vision seeing nothing but the underside of a desk. _I hate this…_ He gripped his heart again, biting back the rocketing pain. _I thought I was okay…this hasn’t happened…in…_ Ryeowook tried to keep his thoughts in order but everything kept screaming and his higher thinking was giving out quickly, its arrival having done nothing but add to the panic. _Not fair…_

A soft, broken whimper slipped between his lips as the boy’s body slumped against the floor, his brain too tired to react to the pain rolling through heart and limbs.


	13. Chapter 13

Zhoumi laughed, pushing at Kyuhyun’s chest. “We can’t skip classes,” he said, feeling his boyfriend’s lips running along his neck. “We already missed breakfast, Kyuhyun!”

“That’s okay,” he replied, undoing Zhoumi’s freshly buttoned shirt, “I could make us even later…if you want…” Kyuhyun smirked, nipping his collar gently.

“K-Kyu!” Zhoumi blushed, pushing the other boy off as he fixed the undone buttons. “Don’t joke so easily about that stuff. It’s a serious matter that we need to discuss okay?” He smiled slightly, leaning down and kissing the dumbfounded boy. “Becoming intimate with someone requires a lot of communication and trust. I don’t think we’re there yet though…”

Kyuhyun stood up, caressing Zhoumi’s face. “How could you say that? I trust you a lot and we talk too. What’s the harm in thinking about _that?_ ”

The second year chuckled, slipping away from Kyuhyun so he could grab his book bag. “Well for starters, until you can call it sex, then we’re not even going to talk about this.”

Kyuhyun opened his mouth to say it but the word wouldn’t come to his lips. A dusty rose color appeared on his face and the younger man cast his eyes down, embarrassed. Well how could anyone say that with ease? It was such an uncomfortable topic. Couldn’t they just do it? If both of them knew exactly what it was why did it matter of Kyuhyun could say the word or not? Young people were doing it all the time…why did Zhoumi have to be all mature and stuff?

“You’re so cute,” Zhoumi remarked, tilting his head and pressing lips against Kyuhyun’s. “Did you wanna sleep over tonight? I hear Kangin has a cool event going on at KUG for this evening!”

Kyuhyun sighed under his breath, unable to be upset around the beautiful boy. “Yeah, that’d be good. I wonder what he has in mind though. There’s not much space down there…”

They walked towards the door to leave the dorm room. Kyuhyun laced their fingers together as the two of them crossed the threshold and Zhoumi turned to lock the room. “Did you know last year he managed to get a circus performance down there? It was pretty impressive to see an elephant at KUG.”

“ _An elephant?_ ” Kyuhyun repeated, eyes growing big. “How did he do that?”

Zhoumi shook his head, exasperated. “I’m not sure, maybe Kangin is magical!”

They continued to talk about a variety of topics as they ventured across campus to their respective building. Zhoumi’s happened to be the one next to Kyuhyun’s. After a few minutes, the pair reached the parting point and with a quick goodbye headed off to class.

Kyuhyun had made it very clear to the older boy what their relationship would be like. He explained to Zhoumi that public displays of affection, excluding hand holding, was strictly forbidden. The latter imagined it was because Kyuhyun was embarrassed to express his feelings in public. However the real reason was far less adorable.

The younger just didn’t want Ryeowook finding out. He didn’t want the news to spread and reach the ears of an innocent child. If that were to happen all of the freedom Kyuhyun had felt in the past month would be gone in an instant. There would be no way to get it back because the world would revolve around Ryeowook again. Kyuhyun would cease to exist as a separate entity. No way in hell was he willing to sacrifice anything else for that wretched child.

Kyuhyun walked into first period carefully, knowing that he would see Ryeowook. When he entered the classroom though, the boy wasn’t there. His eyes scanned the faces but really, Ryeowook was nowhere to be found. Kyuhyun internally scoffed, _He must’ve overslept._ This was exactly what Kyuhyun meant. If he wasn’t around Ryeowook was useless. The kid couldn’t even properly wake up for classes!

Why did someone like that deserve someone as loyal as Kyuhyun? Ryeowook was just a spoiled brat who needed others to take care of him. Dependent people pissed Kyuhyun off the most. They weren’t capable of doing _anything._ Why the hell did they even bother to live with other people? They should’ve just stayed in a bubble somewhere. That way Kyuhyun and all the others like him could be free to life as they chose. He wouldn’t be bound to Ryeowook…nothing would hold them together if the boy became independent….

“Stop standing in the doorway, hound.”

Kyuhyun turned his head, glowering at the equally upset Sungmin. “Why don’t you just jump through a window, stupid bunny? Oh wait; you’re not the brightest, _right_ , that’s why you wouldn’t even know how to climb through a window.”

Sungmin gave the other guy a weird look, pushing past him. “What’s got you extra touchy today? Did you get in a fight with that tall boy toy of yours?”

Anger flared up in Kyuhyun and he snatched Sungmin’s collar, getting up in the hateful boy’s face. “Don’t talk about him like that. You don’t know anything.”

Sungmin curled his hand in the Kyuhyun’s shirt as well. “And why not? Scared that I might tell on you to Wookie?”

“No,” he retorted. “Go ahead and tell Ryeowook. It’s not like he’d believe you anyway. The kid only trusts me.”

A strange spark of emotion touched Sungmin’s eyes and he looked about ready to deck Kyuhyun. “Don’t you care about your friend _at all?_ Why are you talking about him like that? He’s not just some kid! He’s supposed to be—”

“—I don’t care what he’s _supposed_ to be, you stupid bunny! And it’s none of your business what I think or do with Ryeowook. He’s just a—”

“Hey, hey, what are you two doing?” the teacher shoved them apart, looking at each in turn. He was saying something but neither of them was listening. Their eyes were locked on the other, silent words passing in the air. The teacher pushed Sungmin towards his seat, while his assistant led Kyuhyun to his.

There were students watching wide-eyed, unsure what was going on. It was no secret that Kyuhyun and Sungmin didn’t get along. That was old news. But it was the first time any of them had seen the pair get so upset over basically nothing…well, they hadn’t been able to hear the whole conversation so maybe it was about more than the door blocking thing.

Kyuhyun glared out the window the entire period, lucky that the teacher never called on him. Now seeing Ryeowook would be ten times worse. The memory of fighting with that stupid bunny would be all he could think about once that boy showed up. And he would show up because Ryeowook _always_ showed up when Kyuhyun didn’t want to see him the most.

 

First period ended and then second period and third period… When he entered fourth period and Ryeowook had yet to make his appearance, Kyuhyun began to wonder. Where was the kid? He wracked his brain, considerably disturbed.

The last time he saw Ryeowook the boy looked in good health. Sure he hadn’t seen him much the previous night but it wasn’t the first time he had left Ryeowook alone. There was nothing to worry about right…? Kyuhyun crossed his arms, leaning back against the lab table of the science classroom. Why did it feel like he was forgetting something? He knew everything about Ryeowook. This shouldn’t have been a difficult situation.

But then it all came at him in a flurry of memories. His skin chilled and all the blood drained from his face. The teacher entered the classroom, opening his mouth to announce himself, but Kyuhyun was pushing past him, cutting off the man.

He ran out of the building, stumbling down the stairs and onto the smooth walkways of the outdoor campus. The dormitory was across the secluded facility, resting near the west side. Kyuhyun passed person after person, ignoring the scowls and shouts from campus security. He would deal with them later if they came looking.

The door to the dorm was right in front of him and Kyuhyun threw it open, sprinting up the staircase to the second floor. Why hadn’t he been more careful? There was no one else who knew about the condition, except for the school’s doctor and that guy was useless unless Ryeowook went to him. Kyuhyun despised the boy, he really did, but he didn’t want to see him… _dead_ …. There was no way Ryeowook wouldn’t have taken care of himself right? But then again the boy was useless…what if he just waited for Kyuhyun to come save him? What if he had been relying on someone who wasn’t even there? Ryeowook _would_ be that stupid. Kyuhyun knew him the best. He _knew_ that the boy would be praying like a fool for someone…anyone to come and save—

“RYEOWOOK?” Kyuhyun shouted, panting in the doorway of their room.

The slender teen jumped a bit, startled eyes turning to Kyuhyun. He was just putting a scarf around his neck, perfectly upright if not a bit pale. Ryeowook smiled curiously at Kyuhyun. “What are you doing here, Kyu? Don’t you have a science class today?” He picked up his book bag, slinging it over one shoulder.

“You…are you okay?” Kyuhyun breathed, striding up to Ryeowook and touching his face. The skin was a strange temperature, hot but cold, clammy but dry… He gazed painfully at his roommate, gently running his thumb across Ryeowook’s cheek. “Your heart…it was acting up right? What time? We should go see Dr. Choi. He’ll make sure you’re alright okay Wookie?” He reached for Ryeowook’s hand, meaning to lead the boy.

“No, no, I’m okay Kyu,” Ryeowook insisted, slipping away before Kyuhyun could take his hand. He side stepped his breathless roommate, offering a small smile. “I just overslept because you weren’t around. I hope your study session went well,” he patted Kyuhyun’s shoulder faintly. “I’m going to head to class then. I have Music Theory this period and if I miss it my teacher will be really mad…sorry for worrying you though. I’m really okay.”

Kyuhyun turned slowly, watching Ryeowook walking off. His mind screamed that he hated that boy. Not one part of his brain welcomed him. He was supposed to worry about Ryeowook even though he didn’t want to. All of that was true. So why did it leave something to miss in his chest…why did he feel like he had been betrayed? Why was it that all Kyuhyun could think was, _that’s the first time he’s ever lied to me…_

 

 

 


	14. Chapter 14

Ryeowook entered Music Theory, looking greener than he had before leaving the dorm room. To be perfectly honest he had woken up around five that morning but standing up had been rather difficult. For most of the morning Ryeowook had simply laid on the floor, waiting for the soreness to subside. It took longer than expected but once it did he got up and changed for school.

There was nothing to worry about, at least for Kyuhyun. Ryeowook knew that his friend was stressed and tired and probably more than a little cranky. He didn’t want to bother the poor guy by complaining about the episode. Besides, Ryeowook had been able to dress himself and walk to class fine. That meant the attack wasn’t too bad, right? He wasn’t a child anymore. Sure, having Kyuhyun around made things a lot easier but Ryeowook cared about his friend.

They were high school students now. There was no time for just them anymore. Ryeowook understood that and sometimes he wished it wasn’t so. He would’ve loved to run away to that place with Kyuhyun. That’s why he had asked the latter to recite that poem several nights prior. It was Ryeowook’s wish to visit that place one more time before life really took over. Silly yes, but genuine…

Ryeowook smiled to himself through the fog that was fully settling in his mind. Seeing Kyuhyun rush to him that morning was really nice though…. He was just happy that Kyuhyun would go to such lengths to help him. But what was he expecting? They had been like that since the beginning. There was nothing to be surprised by…so why had Ryeowook assumed that his friend wouldn’t show up to help him? Really, distrusting Kyuhyun was becoming so regular those days. What was wrong with Ryeowook?

“Hey, what’s wrong?” Sungmin shook Ryeowook, alarmed eyes the last thing the latter saw before his eyelids fell and he collapsed onto the desk.

 

Sungmin looked up at the teacher. “I’m taking Ryeowook to the infirmary!” He received a prompt okay and quickly he pulled Ryeowook onto his back, carrying him out of the room.

The infirmary was in the main building, luckily only a few yards away from the music building. He hurried into the large brick structure, half running half walking down the empty hallway. The office door was open. Sungmin burst inside with Ryeowook slackly hanging on his back. A handsome man looked up from some papers, taking in the image.

“What’s wrong?” Dr. Choi asked, standing up and helping to lower Ryeowook onto an empty cot. The doctor studied the sickly teen. “Where’s Ryeowook’s roommate, Cho Kyuhyun?”

Sungmin shook his head. “I don’t know but Wookie collapsed in class. Do you know what’s wrong with him?”

Dr. Choi nodded faintly, going over to a cabinet and grabbing a vial, alcohol swab and syringe. “Are you a close friend of Ryeowook’s?” The doctor questioned as he carefully prepared Ryeowook for an injection.

“Uhm yeah…hey, what are you doing?” Sungmin stepped a bit closer, watching as the liquid in the vial entered Ryeowook’s vein.

Dr. Choi tossed the materials into a disposal bin. “It was a liquid form of his heart medication. Ryeowook has a condition where if he overworks his body or becomes too stressed, his heart launches an attack on the body.” He looked at Sungmin grimly. “However, it wasn’t supposed to be this severe. That’s why I asked if Kyuhyun was here,” the doctor explained, “normally more serious attacks like this one aren’t left until this stage when Kyuhyun is present. Do you know what time Ryeowook started feeling pain?”

Sungmin shook his head, managing to form a decent reply, or something close to one. “I don’t live with Ryeowook…I didn’t know he had a heart condition either. Is it dangerous?” He sort of wanted to know the answer, but at the same time he didn’t want to find out that Ryeowook would die one day soon. Sungmin knew he wouldn’t be able to bear it if that were the case.

“Oh no,” Dr. Choi assured, making some notes on a piece of paper, “Ryeowook takes incredible care in keeping his temperaments mild and keeping stress out of his life. Plus, Kyuhyun strictly follows the orders I gave him. Therefore attacks like this one shouldn’t be happening…,” he frowned, “I’m incredibly puzzled actually.”

“What orders?” Sungmin inquired, sitting down on the edge of the empty cot.

The doctor looked up, saying, “Making sure Ryeowook gets plenty of sleep, eats lots of fruit, and takes daily vitamins. The heart medication is used only when Ryeowook is feeling strange, otherwise using it isn’t required or recommended.”

Sungmin felt guilt bubbling up. “Oh…I think it’s the club he joined,” he said softly, swallowing the lump in his throat, “we have a lot of late nights and I guess Wookie hasn’t been sleeping regularly. But he seemed fine…”

“No, no, it’s not your fault,” Dr. Choi insisted, giving the young boy a sympathetic smile, “Ryeowook was the one pushing himself without telling anyone. If he wants to continue doing the club he’s involved with then there are some lifestyle changes he has to make.” Sungmin scrambled for his phone, pulling up a Note and looking at the doctor expectantly. The older man chuckled but continued nonetheless. “He needs to take these pills once a day,” Dr. Choi went over to the cabinet again, rummaging around until he found a white bottle, handing it to Sungmin, “and make sure his heart is keeping a steady rhythm. It would be best to check every other hour. His diet has to include a higher intake of fiber as well as plenty of liquids. Do you understand?” Sungmin finished typing and saving the Note, flashing the thumbs up sign to the doctor.

“Minnie…?”

Sungmin jolted, hurrying over to Ryeowook’s side. He looked down uncertainly at the other boy. “You’re okay Wookie,” he whispered, “you’re at the infirmary. Dr. Choi already helped you and he said you’ll be fine.” Sungmin touched Ryeowook’s forehead, feeling the clamminess start to dissipate.

“Ah…that’s good,” Ryeowook mumbled drowsily, smiling and pressing his head against Sungmin’s hand. “Sorry for bothering you Minnie…at least we didn’t have anything important to do in Music Theory…”

Sungmin laughed silently, lips quivering in a smile. “Yeah…that’s true. You should sleep some more Wookie. I’ll be right here until you wake up.”

“If his condition starts to act up just call this number and I’ll head over,” Dr. Choi said gently, handing Sungmin a business card. The boy took it, putting it in his pocket before turning back to Ryeowook intently.

“Mmhmm…,” Ryeowook cooed, the green undertone of his skin disappearing completely.

Sungmin sighed. At least his friend was visibly getting better. But…he shook his head in disgust as he thought about what to do later that day. Was he really going to trust Kyuhyun to take care of Ryeowook? The guy didn’t even realize his own roommate was so sick! Why did everyone have so much trust in him? Was Sungmin really the only one who could see the ugly truth?

 


	15. Chapter 15

The sun had set by the time Ryeowook opened his eyes to the world. He sat up carefully, blinking away the sand. Where was he? Something warm enveloped his hand, protecting it from nothing and everything. Ryeowook glanced down, seeing an effeminate boy slumbering on the edge of the cot. It was his hand that held Ryeowook’s so securely, warding off anyone who tried to interfere.

“Minnie…Minnie wake up, sleepyhead,” he cooed, stroking the silky black locks thrown across white blankets.

Black eyes slowly opened, foggy with confusion. It took a few seconds for Sungmin to gain his bearings but once he did, the boy shot up, hands reaching up to hold Ryeowook’s face. He searched the other teen’s eyes with concern. “You’re feeling better Wookie?” Sungmin asked in a smooth, quiet voice. He ran his fingers through Ryeowook’s soft hair, pushing the layers away from that latter’s face, “I don’t think your body temperature is erratic anymore…but how do you feel? Is there anything hurting?”

Ryeowook reached up, holding the backs of Sungmin’s hands. “I’m feeling better…so Dr. Choi told you about my heart? Or maybe I told you…,” he blushed, smiling sheepishly, “sorry for scaring you Minnie. I usually don’t collapse like that—”

“—No…no, it’s okay,” Sungmin said, leaning his forehead against Ryeowook’s. Something tender warmed those dark depths that concentrated on the sickly boy. Perhaps it was the effect of moonlight reflecting off the black pools. Maybe it was emotions of the soul reaching out to caress Ryeowook. Sungmin would have suggested the second one as truth. “I’m glad you’re feeling better. It was really scary seeing you so weak.” He chuckled, one hand sliding down to pull the other boy closer, “You’re sort of scatter-brained but definitely not weak.”

“Thanks…,” Ryeowook replied unsure if that was the correct response. Had he been insulted? Well if it was Sungmin, then it couldn’t have been an insult. He was too nice to be, well, mean. “Do you know what time it is?” he asked, hands placed lightly on Sungmin’s shoulders. Ryeowook’s chest pressed against the others; his entire body was being wrapped in the heat radiating from the darker haired boy’s frame.

Sungmin glanced up at the clock from the corner of his eye, quickly returning his gaze to the boy in his arms. “It’s around eight o’clock.”

Their faces hovered a few inches apart, breath touching one another’s cheeks. Ryeowook smiled at his friend, laughing so only the slight shaking of his shoulders could be seen. “You always get too close. Y’know I’m sick, you might catch my disease.”

“Yuck,” Sungmin rolled his eyes, grinning and burrowing his face in Ryeowook’s shoulder. His arms tightened around the latter. “Seriously though…it’s good that you’re not normally hurt by that condition. But if it ever does hurt, I’ll be here so don’t do anything stupid again. You tried to deal with it alone right?”

“Ah…Minnie,” Ryeowook mumbled. He didn’t want to push the boy away but… “I have Kyuhyun so you don’t have to worry so much.”

Sungmin squeezed him more. “And where was Kyuhyun when you were struggling?! Don’t you know that he’s not always going to be there?”

“We’ve been together up until now,” Ryeowook said softly, unable to put strength into those words. They were the truth so why wasn’t he confident in them anymore? “Kyu wouldn’t do anything to purposely hurt me, I know that…”

Sungmin raised his head; his face was twisted in such a mixture of emotions Ryeowook was at a loss for comforting him. The dark haired boy loosened his grip on Ryeowook until only his hands touched the boy, holding that innocent face. “Why isn’t anyone allowed into your world? Why are you only stepping into our places to play but never inviting us over? Kyuhyun isn’t the only one who cares about you Wookie.” Sungmin took a deep breath “And I don’t meant just me. I mean that cute ninth grader Henry, and the funny-cool-guy Mir and so many more care about you as well! We haven’t known each other for very long and we could never know just how much you and Kyuhyun have been through…but can’t you let us try…at the very least?”

“I…I don’t…know…,” Ryeowook whispered, “Kyu…Kyu is the only one who can be near me…he’s the only one…,” he chanted, almost as if he were trying to convince himself of the words.

Sungmin watched, suppressing the words that dared to burst from his lips. How could you hurt someone who was already in such a state? What had happened between Ryeowook and Kyuhyun that made him so crazy about allowing Kyuhyun alone to be near him? Why the hell couldn’t other people reach Ryeowook too?

“Sorry Minnie, can you let go?” Ryeowook asked.

“Ah…,” he muttered, backing up, “You want to see Kyuhyun don’t you?” Sungmin grabbed both of their book bags, before offering his free hand to Ryeowook. “I’ll take you back to the dorms then.”

“Thank you,” Ryeowook sighed in relief, taking the hand and entwining their fingers. “I love how warm your hands always are. It makes me happy,” he remarked quietly, slipping his shoes on and trailing after Sungmin.

“If it helps,” Sungmin shrugged, smiling and tugging Ryeowook closer to himself. “It’s pretty chilly so you should stay close.” He untangled the boy’s scarf from the handle of his book bag, throwing it over Ryeowook’s shoulders as they left the main building. “Bundle up, Wookie.”

Ryeowook nodded firmly, wrapping the long knitted item around his neck and grinning up at Sungmin. “You’re gonna be cold walking without a muffler too Minnie.”

“I radiate heat,” he answered promptly, “there’s no way I would get cold.”

The fairer haired boy frowned behind the thick, fuzzy scarf. He quickly unwound it, tossing it over Sungmin’s face. “We can share since the scarf is extra long,” Ryeowook explained, hugging Sungmin’s arm so it would be easier to stay connected.

He was positive that in a former life he had to have killed many, many, _many_ people because it was pure torture in that moment. If he hadn’t done something bad in a past life, then the gods were bastards for making Ryeowook act like that. It just wasn’t fair that someone so pure had fallen in love with the freaking spawn of a demon.

How did Sungmin know his adorable friend was in love with the hellish creature, Kyuhyun? Wasn’t it sort of obvious already? He had seen every instant from the very beginning when the two of them transferred over. Sungmin had caught every look, every brush of hands, every protective hug, every gentle whisper, every laugh and blush. His mind was engraved with those horrible images.

Sungmin nuzzled against the soft yarn. It smelled of two scents; one of them was certainly Ryeowook whilst the other was someone with a scent close to fresh, lulling. His eyes carefully opened to the chilly air. Why couldn’t that scarf and that scent and those feelings be for Sungmin instead?


	16. Chapter 16

Ryeowook quietly opened the door to his room, fearful of what was on the other side. Hopefully his dearest friend hadn’t heard about the infirmary visit. “Dr. Choi called me.”

Well that hope was shot.

Ryeowook sighed under his breath, closing the door silently behind him. He unwound the scarf from around his neck, draping it over the chair of his desk. “Hi Kyu…,” he greeted weakly, wincing at the glare burning his back. Quickly, Ryeowook removed his jacket and blazer, hanging them up. In record time he had changed into his pajamas, hoping to avoid the wrath of Kyuhyun’s impatience.

When he finally turned around to face his roommate he found Kyuhyun sitting on the lower bunk, eyeing Ryeowook with that mixture of emotions the latter so frequently noted those days. “Come here,” Kyuhyun ordered and Ryeowook listened, hurrying over to stand before the temperamental boy.

“Sorry Kyu, I fell asleep at the infirmary and when I woke up I headed home right away—”

“—with that stupid bunny, right?” Kyuhyun finished abruptly, hands reaching up and harshly gripping Ryeowook’s waist. He dragged the boy towards him, deathly glare cutting through the fairer haired teen. “Sit and listen,” Kyuhyun demanded, feeling Ryeowook oblige and drop into his lap.

The latter lowered his head, not able to look his friend in the eyes. “Minnie was only helping me. He didn’t do anything wrong…in fact he was the one who helped me get to Dr. Choi.”

“Why did you lie to me?”

Ryeowook felt a pang of guilt surge through his chest. “I didn’t want you to worry…”

A bitter laugh passed between his lips and he slid one hand up to hold Ryeowook’s chin, forcing the boy to look at him. “You’ve never worried about bothering me before. Why did you push me away? Or maybe you think that stupid bunny knows you better than I do these days? After all, that how Dr. Choi made it sound.”

“No!” he exclaimed, eyes strained with hurt. “I…I felt like you’ve been really busy these days and it’s because I care about you so much that I didn’t want you bothering with me! Minnie just happened to be beside me when I collapsed…it wasn’t planned…”

Kyuhyun’s jaw clenched. Why couldn’t Ryeowook understand the frustration eating away at him? Was the kid blind or something? Kyuhyun _loathed_ Sungmin. How could Ryeowook not understand that seeing Sungmin chosen over him was aggravating beyond compare? “You don’t get it, Ryeowook,” Kyuhyun snapped. “It’s _his_ fault that this happened. How could you trust the source of your pain to take care of you? That stupid bunny was the one who made you join that club right?” Ryeowook nodded reluctantly. “And he’s the one who’s been pushing you, right?”

“I wanted to push myself Kyu! It isn’t totally Minnie’s fault,” Ryeowook argued softly, “it’s my responsibility for ignoring my body…”

Perhaps he simply ignored the words, channeled all his focus to the anger boiling inside of him, for Kyuhyun hadn’t comprehended a word of Ryeowook’s ownership of the situation. His mind had simply let the words slip by, already so convinced that the boy was a useless human being. Kyuhyun couldn’t even see the adult surfacing within the cute young man.

“You’re not supposed to do these _stupid_ things! If I had been there then this wouldn’t have happened. Lying to me was wrong, Ryeowook. Do you understand?” Kyuhyun stated firmly, watching his companion slowly nod. “Good, then you’re also going to listen and accept these words, alright?”

“What is it?” Ryeowook asked brow furrowed.

 “First, you’re quitting that club. Second, you’re coming straight back to the dorms after classes end for the day. Don’t stay out in the cold or hang around _him_ ,” Kyuhyun said with finality. Those weren’t difficult things to do. In fact, the requirements should have been harsher but Kyuhyun was getting tired of all that bullshit. He didn’t have the heart of the time to worry about what Ryeowook was doing and if he was going down the road to death. There were people like Zhoumi to think about.

“I made a commitment to the club though,” Ryeowook argued in a crushed voice. He had never fought with something Kyuhyun said. Then again, he had never lied to the boy either. Here he was though, doing both of those things in a single day. “I…,” he took a deep breath, “I promised Yesung-hyung and Mir and all of them that I would help with the musical.”

In the coldest, calmest voice Ryeowook had ever heard Kyuhyun use, the latter said, “How can this even be disputed?” Disapproving eyes gazed down at Ryeowook. “You’re telling me that you don’t agree with me? Is that right? Have I ever led you down a wrong path? Why do you doubt me?”

 Those words absolutely struck him. Ryeowook became like putty in Kyuhyun’s hands, eyes reddening with unshed tears. “No…no, I wasn’t doubting you. I’m sorry Kyu…please don’t be mad anymore.” He felt Kyuhyun release his face and pull him towards his body. Ryeowook sniffled, fingers tangling gently in the other boy’s long sleeve shirt.

“I won’t be if you just listen,” he replied softly, the restlessness in his heart settling for whatever reason. Kyuhyun leaned his head against the other’s neck, sighing with a force he didn’t know existed. “Don’t go back to the club. Just stay where I can be near you.”

“Okay…,” Ryeowook murmured, nuzzling closer to Kyuhyun.

He squeezed the vulnerable boy’s body, dragging him down to the bed and laying his head upon the pillows. Kyuhyun ran his hands up and down Ryeowook’s back and sides, immersing himself in the soothing sensations coursing through his tense muscles. Their bodies were side by side in the shadows of the bunk bed, Kyuhyun closer to the wall and holding the other in an unmovable embrace. “Good,” he whispered, brushing his lips over Ryeowook’s, “you’re better right here.”

“As it’s always been…,” Ryeowook replied, eyelids growing heavy with the comforting warmth of Kyuhyun’s form around him.

***

Zhoumi checked his phone for perhaps the tenth time that night. Why hadn’t Kyuhyun called? They had made plans to go to KUG together…and yet here Zhoumi was at KUG alone. It wasn’t like Kyuhyun to cancel without saying a word. There had to be something that forced the boy to blow off their plans.

A strangely irritating pain picked at Zhoumi’s mind and heart. Kyuhyun couldn’t have gone off to help his roommate, Kim Ryeowook right? He hadn’t seen them hanging around that often as of late so that couldn’t be the issue…unless it was. That sneaky little kid probably begged Kyuhyun to spend time with him. Zhoumi knew that the pair was close…but who exactly was the boyfriend? It sure as hell shouldn’t have been Ryeowook.

“What’s with the face, Zhoumi?” Eunhyuk asked, leaning over and looking at the underclassmen. “Did you get in a fight with your precious Kyu?”

“No…he just hasn’t called me,” the younger man replied absently, shrugging.

“Oh,” the third year said, stretching out the noise as he took the empty space beside Zhoumi and flung his arm around the latter’s shoulders, “he ditched you then?”

“I don’t know,” Zhoumi sighed, downing his drink in one swift gulp. At least it wasn’t alcohol. Eunhyuk nodded sympathetically. “He’s never done this before. Maybe something bad happened to him.” Zhoumi desperately wanted to push the thought of Ryeowook and Kyuhyun being together, out of his mind. He had never had a relationship before and now he was insecure as well. Why didn’t he trust Kyuhyun? They hadn’t faced any problems in the past month. Surely Zhoumi was overreacting. It was one mistake out of many great accomplishments.

“He’s a cocky brat but I’m pretty sure he likes you,” Eunhyuk remarked off-handedly, giving his friend’s shoulder a slight squeeze. “Don’t worry too much Mimi. You’re a beginner in these types of things so if you ever need any help, I’m here, ‘kay?”

“What experience do you have?” Zhoumi muttered, frowning at the platinum blond third year.

Eunhyuk smirked, leaning close to the younger man’s ear and saying, “You can’t tell anyone, okay Mimi?” The other boy nodded slowly, skeptically. “I was the one who got Kangin with Teukie-hyung.”

“WHAT??”

Eunhyuk slammed his hand over the outraged boy. A small nervous laugh passed through his lips and he sent a glare Zhoumi’s way. “Calm down and listen,” Eunhyuk hissed.

Zhoumi jerked his senior’s hand down, retorting, “There’s no way those two were _ever_ together! How could you even joke about something like that? It’s just… _weird._ ”

“Oh please,” Eunhyuk scoffed, rolling his eyes, “if you ever saw them together you’d think they were a couple without a shadow of a doubt.”

“Well I’ve never seen them together and I’m guessing there’s a reason and that’s that Teukie-hyung lives in a totally different world from KUG’s owner,” Zhoumi whispered harshly. His friend had to have been going crazy. Who would ever put those two together, even as a joke? They were so incredibly…opposite.

Kangin impressed with strength and confidence and allure of freedom. He sought to help the students at school on a more modern level by giving them a chance to have fun while studying and keeping busy. Plus, the fellow was so broad and manly…he couldn’t be gay, right? That was the major problem with Eunhyuk’s lie, y’know, aside from the whole personality mesh.

And then you had the gentle, charming Teukie-hyung with his dimple smile and crescent eyes. He probably had never even dyed his hair brown or thought about getting contacts. The president was friendly and companionable and hell of a lot more caring than the “party it up” KUG creator. Teukie-hyung was never out of sorts or flustered by anyone. He was the embodiment of loveless. When someone had experienced love how could they be as detached as the president? If he were to run into his “ex-Kangin” then wouldn’t he become uncomfortable?

Then again...they were never together. How could that be gauged?

“Have you figured it out?” Eunhyuk asked casually, licking the sweet remnants of his drink off his lips. “If you want some proof then just say the word. After all, this is for your benefit.”

“…what proof?” Zhoumi prompted after a second’s hesitation. If the older boy wasn’t lying then was Zhoumi friends with such a master of love?

Eunhyuk grinned, excited to have finally reached this point. He took out his phone, texting something quickly. “Teukie-hyung will be here in four or five minutes.”

“You called him here?!” Zhoumi gasped, grabbing Eunhyuk’s collar with wild eyes. “He’ll shut down KUG in a heartbeat you psycho! Why would you do this?”

“You seriously need to calm down Mimi,” Eunhyuk raised an eyebrow, forcing the younger boy to let go of him. “What’s got you so hyped up anyway?” His eyes wandered down to the empty glass sitting on the table. Picking it up, Eunhyuk took a whiff of it and sighed in dismay. “Oh man…so this is what Drunk-Zhoumi is like?”

“Not drunk,” Zhoumi snapped, “that doesn’t have alcohol. Why did you text Teukie-hyung?”

Eunhyuk tried to explain it but the other boy had gone off on a tangent, his voice level rising with each passing minute. The blond noticed curious onlookers beginning to strain their ears, and his panic level rose. If everyone heard what Zhoumi was practically screaming then there would be no way to keep the crowds calm and Teukie-hyung wouldn’t be able to do anything.

Without many more options and a number of approaching people, Eunhyuk made an executive decision, smothering Zhoumi’s out of control mouth with his own. He pushed the drunk boy down to the booth’s cushions, crushing the latter’s lips and leading his tongue around. Eunhyuk relaxed a bit, feeling the young man quiet down against his kiss. But then there was a sharp pain and the older one jerked back, wincing and touching his lip. “You bite really hard,” he muttered at Zhoumi.

“Why are you kissing me?” he demanded, shoving Eunhyuk back. “I’m Kyuhyun’s boyfriend.”

Eunhyuk felt a massive headache coming on. How had he become the bad guy? Was it his fault that Zhoumi couldn’t keep his loud, drunken mouth shut? It wasn’t like he gave the kid alcohol! Whoever did though should burn in hell’s deepest pits.

Before the boy could say anymore though, Eunhyuk heard the trap door open and without further ado, covered the blabbering boy’s mouth and indicated the person descending into KUG. Several people whipped around, eyeing the guest who had entered without permission. It wasn’t often that you saw someone with such access to the underground club. So the students turned in hopes of identifying the V.I.P.

Dressed in the most precious white sweater and form fitting white pants was the StudGov president. He pulled the sleeves of his top down, holding the edges close with his long fingers. A calm, passive expression was painted on the honor student’s face, much in contrast to the shocked silent dancers.

Teukie-hyung finally seemed to notice the stunned people and he covered his mouth, eyes widening a bit. “Oh…don’t mind me,” he waved his hand kindly, flashing a small smile, “I’m not here to bust you tonight. Just think of this as a free pass, hmm?”

“YOU KNOW ABOUT THIS PLACE??” Nearly every person at KUG that night shouted at their beloved leader.

The president chuckled softly, bare shoulders moving up and down subtly. “You’re all so silly,” he remarked, amusement dancing in his eyes, “how could I be oblivious to it? KUG is famous, is it not?” Teukie-hyung looked around the club. “It looks like it’s an event night! You kids have fun and don’t get into too much trouble, alright?” They nodded dumbly, following the third year with their eyes as he travelled down the rest of the staircase.

Zhoumi gaped, eyes bugging out. Eunhyuk shook his head, pointing at the scene. “Not yet, it’s almost here though.”

“Why are you here?” Kangin confronted Teukie-hyung, holding the slender man’s wrist. “Do you have business with my club, Jungsu?”

The dancers went silent again, watching the progressing scene with much fascination. Eunhyuk had been seeing them together for years. It was nothing new. For everyone else though, this must have been the greatest shown on earth.

Teukie-hyung shook his head, eyes shifting around as he tried to pull away from the other’s grip. “Eunhyuk asked me to come here. He said it was something important and that you wouldn’t mind. Do you…?” He turned large eyes to Kangin, appearing that much more feminine beside the muscular man.

Kangin shuffled, eyes casting down and then back up several times. There were some murmurs of confusion in the crowd but no one dared admit what they were thinking. It was the same thought Eunhyuk had every time he saw Kangin with Teukie-hyung. The bigger guy always…stuttered so much.

“If you…if you’re not comfortable with me being here I can leave…,” Teukie-hyung offered, touching the other’s arm faintly.

Kangin shook his head vigorously. “No, that’s not it! You know that I love having you around…I…well….”

Zhoumi tugged on Eunhyuk’s sleeve. The older looked away from the scene. “What’s up?” he asked the drunken boy.

“They’re…are they dating?” he asked.

Eunhyuk winced, fighting to put the right words together. “It’s…more complicated than that…”

“Try explaining it then.”

He leaned back against the booth cushions, folding his arms and thinking. “Well…they’re…sort of together…but not officially…but they were at one point…and then Teukie became Teukie-hyung and Kangin became KUG Kangin…hmm…,” Eunhyuk gritted his teeth, the headache coming back stronger.

“Don’t hurt yourself, hyung,” Zhoumi muttered.

“Shut up you brat,” Eunhyuk growled. “Anyway, do you trust me to help you and Kyuhyun?”

Zhoumi glanced one more time at Kangin and Leeteuk but they were nowhere to be found. It was like they had never been there because everyone had gone back to dancing and partying and drinking. However, that image had been burned into Zhoumi’s mind. It was no illusion. “…Yeah, I trust you.”


	17. Chapter 17

Kyuhyun entered the Math Team’s meeting room. The expression on his face was far from friendly. He didn’t even offer his boyfriend a smile as he brushed past straight to the teacher. The first year spoke in hushed voices with the man, explaining his need for excused absence for just one day.

Once he was granted leave, Kyuhyun hurried towards the door, only stopping because Zhoumi latched onto his arm. The second year stared at his boyfriend questioningly. “Where are you going? We have practice.”

“I can’t today,” he replied vaguely, gently pulling his arm away. “Sorry about the cancelled plans too. There were problems that night and I couldn’t tell you that I wouldn’t make it. I hope you still had fun though.”

“It would’ve been better had you been there…,” Zhoumi said quietly, the hurt in his voice evident. As much as he dreamed alcohol made you forget, it didn’t. He still vividly recalled the kiss he shared with another boy. It had been bugging him all day and yet here he was finally face to face with Kyuhyun and the latter didn’t even care to acknowledge Zhoumi’s presence.

Kyuhyun sighed, almost sounding exasperated with the complaints. “Trust me, you’re the one I want to be around right now…but there are things I’ve begun that I can’t just toss aside as I please.” He peered at Zhoumi from the corner of his eye, offering as sincere a look as he could muster. “I’m sorry, I’ll explain one day. I have to go for now though.”

He slipped away from Zhoumi exiting the classroom and disappearing around a corner. Zhoumi watched him until he no longer could, mulling over what had just happened. What could be more important than your relationship? It wasn’t as if any of them had relatives to worry about. The only possible problem a student of that academy could be facing would be social issues. What were Kyuhyun’s issues if they weren’t about Zhoumi?

***

Ryeowook waited outside of the building, leaning against a pillar. The bell rang and soon students were pouring out of all the exits. He knew for a fact though, that Sungmin used the main entrance and exit for everything. It was one of his oddities that Ryeowook had never gotten around to asking about.

Sure enough, after a few minutes, the familiar head of black hair bobbed out of the building. The boy was flipping through songs on his MP3, humming quietly to the tune playing in his ears. It was sort of adorable how he bounced along with it, making him look like the most carefree person to ever grace the earth. Ryeowook was sort of jealous as he gazed upon his friend. Why were some allowed so much joy while others were allowed heartache?

He caught Sungmin by the shoulder. “Minnie…!”

The darker haired boy stopped, looking at Ryeowook and smiling. He threw his arms around the boy, hugging him cutely. “How are you feeling? Should you be walking around when you’re not one-hundred-percent better?” The serious undertone of his words was not missed by Ryeowook though.

“Kyu is taking care of me so I’ll be fine,” he said softly, close to Sungmin’s ear, “but there’s something I have to tell you.”

Sungmin prepared to hear that the roommates were dating. He also prepared to hear that Ryeowook finally realized he was in love with an undercover cold bastard. Furthermore, he had imagined his cute fan-service-partner telling him that he wasn’t allowed to see Sungmin anymore. Or perhaps a mixture of all three options would spill from the boy’s lips.

“I have to quit Tech Crew.”

Sungmin jolted, eyes widening. “What?” He hadn’t been prepared for that one. “Why?”

“Kyu said that I overstrained myself because of this club,” Ryeowook explained, “so I promised him that I would quit.”

“Hold on,” Sungmin took his friend’s hand, leading him to a more deserted part of campus. He released Ryeowook, turning on him. “Why would you promise him that? You love Tech Crew, or that’s how I saw it anyway.” Ryeowook looked distressed, eyes moving in all directions. His lips formed unsaid words and his gloved fingers fiddled. Sungmin grabbed hold of either side of the fidgeting boy’s face. “I’m not mad at you so just tell me what’s going on. Why are you so obedient when it comes to Kyuhyun?”

Ryeowook subconsciously kept Sungmin’s hands on his cheeks, keeping them there with his own. “Kyu is always right though. I can’t argue when I know that he’s doing it for me. He knows me best and he’s right about the club. It’s because I pushed myself so hard.”

“Then don’t push yourself so much, Wookie!” Sungmin exclaimed, stepping closer. “We’re not asking you to die for the club. All of us just want to have fun together. What’s wrong with that? How come Kyuhyun can’t understand something so simple?”

“It’s for my sake though…,” Ryeowook mumbled, eyes fogging with confusion, “Kyu told me it was for my sake. He’s doing his best to take care of me even though he’s so busy…”

Sungmin felt like slapping the poor fool and hugging him too. It was a strange sensation to say the least. He carefully swallowed the abusive urges and took a long, refreshing breath. “Wookie, if this is what _you_ want then do as you please. I’m not going to force you to do anything, especially if you’re this against it.”

The boy nodded slightly, reaching into his pocket and withdrawing an envelope. “Then could you turn this resignation in for me?” Ryeowook inquired in a soft voice. “…I promised Kyu that I wouldn’t take too long.”

“Sure,” Sungmin said, taking the envelope.

“Thanks so much,” Ryeowook bowed a bit and then hurried off through the grey autumn afternoon. He disappeared around the building they had been standing near.

Sungmin didn’t even glance at the resignation as he tore it in half and tossed it in a trash can. There was no way in hell he would take the club away from Ryeowook. He wasn’t Kyuhyun and therefore didn’t have a heart that was capable of ignoring the wills of Ryeowook.

 

 


	18. Chapter 18

It had been a total of three days. Three days had passed with no word from Kyuhyun whatsoever. He hadn’t even shown up for Math Team. What could be keeping him so preoccupied? Zhoumi didn’t dare call from fear of coming off as needy, but it was really bothering him. How could Kyuhyun up and disappear like that without so much as a word? Zhoumi hadn’t been dating for long but he was pretty sure ignoring your boyfriend was a big no-no. Did Kyuhyun know that though? Maybe that’s why he thought it was alright to vanish. Maybe the younger boy was only vaguely aware of the differences between a boyfriend and just a friend.

Zhoumi frowned to himself, sighed, and called Eunhyuk. The third year _did_ say he would help Kyuhyun and Zhoumi out.

The older boy answered after a few seconds with “Yo, what’s up Mimi?”

“Kyuhyun hasn’t called me or contacted me or spoken to me in three days and I don’t know why,” Zhoumi spilled rapidly.

Eunhyuk made a weird sound and then said, “Well you can’t just sit around thinking about it. You have to go talk to him. It sounds like a bad idea but it’s really not. Relationships are all about mutual understanding and realizing that both sides need to contribute. If both of you are hiding your feelings then eventually you’ll lose each other.”

There were more weird noises and then another voice who said, “Why are you talking on the phone? We need to get this shit out of here! We’re opening in less than half an hour you idiot!”

“…Where are you…?” Zhoumi asked slowly, eyes narrowing in confusion.

“KUG,” Eunhyuk grunted, sounding as if he were moving something, “Kangin was busy last night and didn’t have time to clean out the club so now he’s making me—”

Lots of static passed through the line and then Eunhyuk’s voice was replaced by Kangin’s. “Sorry but he’s going to have to call you back,” and then the line was cut.

 Zhoumi sighed, putting the phone in his pocket and standing up. Well he already had the information on what needed to be done. Eunhyuk had gotten Teukie-hyung and Kangin together. That had to have some merit, right? Maybe the blonde wasn’t totally crazy. Zhoumi left his room, locking it behind him.

The second year dorms were across campus from the first year dorms but that was alright. His mission was important and distance meant little. If Kyuhyun wasn’t coming to him then he would just go to Kyuhyun. That didn’t mean he was needy right? It just meant that he wanted to see his boyfriend and figure out what was going on. Yes, nothing was wrong because in a mature relationship discussing your insecurities was good. Zhoumi guessed this at least. Hopefully it wouldn’t send his boyfriend and him down the gutter.

He climbed the stairs to Kyuhyun’s floor, having bypassed the lacking security. The school seriously needed to realize that foster kids weren’t all that great of kids. Then again…Teukie-hyung knew about KUG and wasn’t doing anything to stop it. There was something off about that, huh? Maybe he just liked Kangin too much. Whatever though.

Zhoumi prepared to knock on Kyuhyun’s door but stopped when he heard noises coming through the thin wooden barrier. The hall was so silent nearly anything could’ve been heard at that moment. The tall boy pressed his ear against the door, straining his ears to hear what was going on. He didn’t want to step in during a fight or something. That would be rude and awkward to interrupt others.

Muffled voices spoke, some words were mumbled but it was mainly noises and whines. There was a whimper followed by a low growling. Something hit a wall at the same time Kyuhyun practically shouted “Stop being stubborn!”

Zhoumi felt his chest tighten and he wasn’t certain what was going on within himself. Why was he suspecting the worst when it could’ve been anything? What if Kyuhyun was totally innocent? Not knowing what else to do, the tall boy opened the door, surprised momentarily by the fact that it was unlocked. Why would they have left it unlocked had they been doing something inappropriate? That was what Zhoumi _should_ have considered. And yet…he didn’t.

This was simply due to his stressed, panicky state caused by insecurities as a newcomer to the world of dating. If Kyuhyun had been his second or third boyfriend, perhaps he would’ve attempted to believe in their – though brief – relationship just a bit more.  

The older boy stumbled into the room, red faced and disheveled. He should have considered the fact that Kyuhyun was Ryeowook’s caregiver; a sort of nanny since childhood would best describe the boy to be honest.

Instead he saw Kyuhyun pinning the other boy to the bed as he undressed him rapidly.

The older boy should have given thought to the possibility that they were not preparing to do anything sexually explicit because there was a bottle of liquid medicine clenched in Kyuhyun’s hand and the looks they were giving each other were similar to angry cats.

Instead he saw the pair lying in a bed together, tangled in sheets and hovering close to one another’s faces with heated gazes.

The older boy _should_ have seen the stream of blue liquid dripping between their interconnected mouths and understood that it was medicine. Obviously Ryeowook had been fighting too much and refused to take the bitter liquid; therefore Kyuhyun – who was too fed up – forced it down his throat manually.

Instead he saw them passionately kissing.

“What’s going on here?” Zhoumi asked in a quiet voice, muscles tensing angrily. Perhaps he should’ve been sad and/or crying, but it wouldn’t come. Just seeing the betrayal drove the red fury through his veins. Where did Kyuhyun get off cheating on him so openly? Was he out to hurt Zhoumi? What kind of bastard had he chosen as his first boyfriend?

Kyuhyun jolted up, looking at Zhoumi with wide eyes. “What are you doing here?” he blurted, struggling to get out of the twisted sheets.

“Who is that…?” Ryeowook mumbled, the effects of the night medicine already working. His fingers bent around Kyuhyun’s shirt tugging softly as he leaned a tired head against the other boy’s lean body.

Kyuhyun looked back down at Ryeowook, a strangely unreadable emotion rushing over his features. “Ah…go to sleep,” he murmured, gently leading his roommate back down to the mattress.

“You’re not even going to introduce me Kyuhyun?” Zhoumi demanded, taking a step towards the open doorway. What the hell was going on? He thought something was going on between Kyuhyun and Ryeowook because of rumors but he hadn’t expected them to be this _accurate._ “Why did you ask me out if you already had someone you liked?”

Kyuhyun took a step forward and Zhoumi did the opposite, keeping the distance the same. “Look it’s now what you think!” he whisper-yelled. “It was just medicine! I was helping him, that’s all! There’s nothing going on between me and him.”

“Why didn’t you just give it to him normally? Why do you have to make excuses? A relationship doesn’t require excuses so why are you always making them these days?” Zhoumi said sharply. “Whatever…just…just go back to whatever you were doing. I’m done.”

“What do you mean by that?” Kyuhyun asked uncertainly, his eyes clouding with hurt.

Zhoumi shrugged. “I don’t know. I…I need to get out of here.” He turned on his heel, walking out of the room quickly.

Without hesitation, Kyuhyun hurried after his boyfriend, catching the older boy by the wrist. “Will you just listen to me? I told you that I have some issues to work out. But…But I mean it when I tell you that I like you! Please Zhoumi…just don’t do anything crazy, okay?”

“Not even going to tell me what I need to here?” he hisses, jerking out of Kyuhyun’s grip. “I’m supposed to be the most important thing in your life right? I’m your first boyfriend and your present boyfriend. Why are you prioritizing that other kid?!”

“I…,” Kyuhyun felt his body freezing over and all the gears in his brain turn at an irregular tune. Everything hurt and yet everything felt like it was crumbling in a _good_ way. He fought to put it all back to its original places, just long enough to finish his thought to Zhoumi. I wasn’t very good and he was pretty sure that was the end of his relationship…but someone needed to hear what he was feeling. Kyuhyun needed at least one person to have insight into the true amount of confusion chaining his heart and mind. “I don’t know…,” and he put every ounce of emotion into those words.

As Zhoumi stalked off, Kyuhyun wondered if the other boy had truly been able to understand the phrase. Perhaps then the conflicted Kyuhyun would have an idea of what was going on inside of himself because obviously he couldn’t do it alone.

***

Zhoumi didn’t know where to go. He just wanted to get away from the mess of relationships and feelings and jealousy. This wasn’t like him. He hated how Kyuhyun made him feel and at the same time he loved how it felt being with someone who paid so much attention to him. The feelings of liking someone…did they really outweigh the pain of liking someone?

Without realizing it, he found himself at the entrance of KUG. The club wasn’t quite up and running yet. It never really started going until ten or twenty minutes after opening. During the time-lapse Kangin and Eunhyuk usually just wandered around, double checking equipment and such.

And so, Zhoumi opened the trap door and climbed down, seeing the blond immediately. The third year was sitting in a booth alone, texting on his phone and sipping some most likely alcoholic beverage. He looked up at the arrival, expression changing when he processed who it was. Eunhyuk gave the younger man a once over and silently waved the bartender over. He murmured a drink order and then nodded for Zhoumi to join him at the booth.

Relief that the tall, graceful boy had never felt before washed over him as he collapsed beside Eunhyuk. Originally he had only felt the anger boiling deep in the pit of his stomach, unforgiving and hateful. But as he sank further into the leather cushions and the deliciously intoxicating atmosphere of KUG, his fury dispersed, replaced with a cold melancholy.

The drink Eunhyuk had ordered came, smelling strongly of alcohol and strawberry. He put an arm around Zhoumi, allowing the younger to lean on him. “You had your first fight?” Eunhyuk inquired softly, casually.

Zhoumi nodded, swallowing half the glass of strawberry liquor in one go. “I thought you said that it was good to communicate in a mutual relationship. Tell me why we fought instead?”

“Every couple has their problems,” Eunhyuk explained gently, patting Zhoumi’s shoulder, “And obviously this will only bring you two closer, don’t think you?”

“How is that even possible?” he cried, slamming the now empty drink down on the glossy black table. “We’re probably over! I feel like hell and do you know why?”

“Well I certainly know now that you have no tolerance for alcohol,” Eunhyuk muttered, moving the abused glass off to the side.

Zhoumi ignored the side comment. “Kyuhyun really does have something going on with his roommate, that Ryeowook kid! I caught them and they didn’t even look sorry. Kyuhyun gave me some half-baked excuse too…”

Before Eunhyuk could say anything, Kangin bounded up, all smiles. He looked at both of the boys, unable to hide the glee on his face…at all. “And how are you doing tonight Mimi? Hyukkie?” Kangin prompted. The guy didn’t even wait for an answer though as he heard a knock on the trap door and went over to let guests in.

Eunhyuk leaned close to Zhoumi’s ear, saying, “Him and Teukie-hyung fucked recently and so now he’s on Cloud Nine.”

“Fucked…?” Zhoumi repeated with his eyes cast down thoughtfully.

“Yeah, y’know had sex?” Eunhyuk explained, raising an eyebrow at the interest in Zhoumi’s voice. The boy usually ignored vulgar stuff like that. At least the topic was vulgar in some ways, especially since the context had to do with someone else’s sex life.

“Fuck me.”

Eunhyuk’s head shot down to Zhoumi. “W-What?”

The younger boy gazed up at him. “You heard me. Do it.” He pulled Eunhyuk’s hand, forcing him out of the booth and through the mostly empty dance floor. The older was in too much of a dazed shock to really process what was going on.

They had somehow arrived at Zhoumi’s room during the course of Eunhyuk’s internal speechlessness. It took Zhoumi shutting the door for Eunhyuk to really get what was going on. This wasn’t some wild fantasy or some shit like that. The kid was serious.

“Hey, hey Mimi, you’re just really drunk,” Eunhyuk insisted, backing away from the approaching boy. “You don’t want to do this. I can guarantee you don’t.”

“Kyu and I are over,” he argued, shoving Eunhyuk back against the door, “I don’t want someone who can’t even be faithful for a full month! I…I just want to be comforted… We’re friends aren’t we Eunhyuk? Why can’t you do this for me?” Zhoumi’s hand travelled down to the other boy’s tight black pants, long fingers running over the hardness of his crotch. “…In return I’ll help you with this little problem, hmm?”

Eunhyuk gasped sharply, wincing at the touch. “No, I’m okay seriously,” he stated with the last remnants of willpower. But then he heard the sound of his zipper being undone and the black fabric being pushed down. An involuntary moan escaped his lips and he slammed a hand over his mouth.

A warmth, wet cavern engulfed his exposed member and Eunhyuk was then utterly lost to his desires. There was no way he could give in to morals now. Now that Zhoumi had his fucking wonderful mouth around him, Eunhyuk’s voice had disappeared, replaced by erotic moans and pants. When was the last time someone had blown him? Damn…he couldn’t even remember anymore. How sad was that?

Eunhyuk took a fistful of Zhoumi’s hair, forcing the kneeling man to go deeper. “More…,” he breathed, meeting each bob of the young man’s mouth, “Shit Zhoumi…you sure you aren’t a virgin?”

Zhoumi didn’t answer. Placing his hand on Eunhyuk’s hips, he forced the length farther and faster, eyes tearing up from the force. It was alright though. He needed to distract himself. His body needed to be affected by someone other than Kyuhyun.

Before the blond could release, he pushed the kneeling man back. “No way babe,” Eunhyuk stated breathlessly, leading Zhoumi to the bed and pinning him against the clean sheets, “you wanna be fucked? You got it.”

 


	19. Chapter 19

Ryeowook woke up in the middle of the night. It had been a week and a half since he left Tech Crew. That wasn’t the only thing that had happened though. In the past week and a half Kyuhyun hadn’t left his side. He had never wanted to see Kyuhyun give him room to breathe before, but hey, high school was a place for first times right?

Without alerting the slumbering boy who was breathing so deeply and evenly, Ryeowook sneaked out of the room, closing the door silently. There was a red moon that night and the best place to view it was on the rooftop. If he was lucky, maybe Henry would be up there. When was the last time Ryeowook had been around another person aside from Kyuhyun? Of course he saw Sungmin everyday in Music Theory, but that didn’t count. They were always busy with class work and trying to have a casual conversation was nearly impossible.

Ryeowook opened the door to the rooftop. Cold air attempted to cut through his thick sweater, failing miserably. The warm boy shuffled out, gazing up at the sky. He spotted the blood red moon and smiled widely. It was beautiful…in an eerie sort of way. The reason was deeply embedded in the myth of red moons.

Soft, sorrowful violin drifted through the chilly breeze, bringing Ryeowook’s attention to the silhouette standing atop the highest point on the rooftop. His brilliant figure was pressed against the background of a rising red moon, creating an ominous photo. It took several more minutes for the music to finally stop and at that point, Ryeowook made his presence apparent.

“When there’s a red moon, they say lunatics come out,” the older boy remarked, feeling more than seeing the surprise on Henry’s face, “so you should be careful Henry. With that cute face people will be coming to get you left and right.”

“October _is_ the month of witches and ghosts and scary stories, Wookie-hyung,” he replied, laughing quietly. His voice was all Ryeowook could decipher, follow. There was no face to match it on such a night.

“You’re right,” Ryeowook replied, smiling widely. “Hey Henry, can I ask you something?”

“Sure Wookie-hyung, I’d listen any time,” he affirmed sweetly.

“What do you think is more important? Understanding physical limitations,” Ryeowook offered, “or Passion?”

The ninth-grader was quiet for a long time, truly considering the options. When he finally spoke again, he said, “Passion, because it’s something that can’t be broken. Physical limitation can be surpassed sometimes. It all depends on the determination…don’t you think so too Wookie-hyung? Or maybe I’m just imagining.”

Ryeowook nodded slowly and glanced back up at the brightly glowing red moon. “What time is it, Henry?” he asked, his mind obviously elsewhere.

“Hmm…just a little past 10:45 PM. Why are you asking?”

“I have to go!” he called back to Henry as he bolted off the rooftop, not bothering to silence the swinging metal door as it slammed into its lock.

Tonight was the dress rehearsal for _Phantom of the Opera._ Then the next night it would be the actual performance. Ryeowook already knew he’d never be able to get out of Kyuhyun’s sight long enough to watch the musical. But…he had wanted to see it so bad. Living as all students of that academy lived, how could you _not_ want to see something so cultured? Ryeowook had never been able to watch a production. He had never been so involved in something before and to be pulled out so close to the end…he couldn’t do it.

Instead of seeing it as a bad thing, shouldn’t everyone have been seeing it as a good thing? This was the first time Ryeowook had felt like disregarding himself. This was the first time he had put everything he had into aiding something else.

There was no way in any heaven or hell he would abandon it.

Ryeowook glanced up at the still burning bloody moon hanging overhead. His lungs were aching a bit as he ran through the cold night but it was alright. After all, his heart medicine was in his pocket. Plus…his eyes flitted up to the moon one last time as a smile crossed his lips…it was the night of lunatics. Why couldn’t Ryeowook join them for just one little night?

 

The auditorium was still brightly lit. He pushed the back entrance of the Tech Shop open, walking in quickly and looking around the empty back room. Noises and music could be heard on the other side of the thick black wall. Ryeowook listened closely for a few moments, trying to figure out which scene they were at.

“The Phantom is saying goodbye to his love.”

Ryeowook whirled around, relief filling him. “Mir!” he whisper-exclaimed, running up to the darkly dressed first year, “Why aren’t you out there helping?”

“That’s how you greet people?” the other muttered, frowning. He sighed. “I came back here to deliver a message to someone but then I heard a weird noise and happened to find you.”

“Oh,” Ryeowook flushed, “you should go then!”

Mir patted his friend’s (?) shoulder, smiling a bit. “I’ll take you up to the Sound Booth. Sungmin is already there.”

“It’s alright! I remember where it is,” Ryeowook assured, slipping away and hurrying out a side door. He wanted to see his friend. He wanted to tell Sungmin that something had come over him and here he was, defying Kyuhyun. Guilt knotted his stomach but Ryeowook ignored it. He would deal with the uncomfortable sensation later.

Ryeowook pushed the door to the Sound Booth open, becoming engulfed by the dark. There was a large rectangular window that allowed a perfect view of the musical. The Phantom stood on the stage, sorrowfully singing his goodbye. Ryeowook frowned, studying the actor. Was that…

“Yesung-hyung is really good isn’t he, Mir?” Sungmin murmured.

 _Oh…so it was Yesung!_ Ryeowook’s heart beat faster. He hadn’t realized how much he missed hearing Sungmin’s voice so close, so sweet. In fact, the boy failed to notice the beauty of anyone’s voice aside from Kyuhyun as of late.

Slowly, Ryeowook crept up behind Sungmin, wrapping his arms around the sitting boy and leaning his head over the latter’s shoulder. “Not Mir, Minnie,” he snickered, grinning, “Ryeowook.”

Sungmin stiffened, wide eyes turning to look at the adorable boy. “Wookie?” he whispered, subconsciously hugging the other boy’s arms that embraced him. “You’re here!”

“I couldn’t help it,” Ryeowook replied, “I wanted to see how this ended. I didn’t like the idea of not being a part of the final production.”

“This is as close as you can get on your own huh?” Sungmin teased, smirking playfully at the close boy.

“Yeah,” he mumbled, slightly pink in the face.

“No problem,” the former answered softly, brushing his cheek against Ryeowook’s, “I’ll be there to help you along, Wookie.”

Perhaps Ryeowook should have heard the promise in those words. However, he didn’t. All he heard were the sweet, encouraging words of a friend. If the boy _had_ considered the depth of Sungmin’s promise, then maybe their first year wouldn’t have been wasted.

 


	20. Chapter 20

Kyuhyun hadn’t known how much it hurt. He sure was feeling a hell of a lot of pain for it being only a few months into school. What was going on? The boy shook his head. There was no way he was going to keep moping around. Zhoumi had broken up with him and he hadn’t done a damn thing to stop it. What kind of boyfriend was he?

“I’m home,” Ryeowook announced, walking into the room and setting his stuff down to start homework.

Why hadn’t he done anything…seriously? Kyuhyun rolled over on his bunk bed, the book falling from his hand. A week had passed since their fight. Maybe it was time to get some form of closure. Kyuhyun hated how his mind always wandered back to how Zhoumi had ended things. There was something so…wrong about it all.

“Hey…I’m gonna go out for a little bit, okay?” Kyuhyun said, forgetting his house arrest rules. Ryeowook simply gaped at the boy, but the expression was ignored. “Be back later.” And then he was out the room and walking down the hall.

Kyuhyun walked across campus, the sun setting over the trees. His heart still called out to Zhoumi, or at least he thought it did. When his thoughts wandered to the older boy, feelings of excitement simply overwhelmed him. Wasn’t that a clear cut sign?

                                                                           ***                                               

“We can’t keep doing this.”

Zhoumi frowned, jerking Eunhyuk close to him and licking the older boy’s parted lips. “Why not? We’re not doing anything wrong. I’m single.” He smirked, pushing the other backwards on the bed. “And how can you say that when we’re in the middle of fucking?”

Eunhyuk groaned, feeling the tight space squeezing his member. His hands traveled up to hold Zhoumi’s hips as he tried to quicken the pace. “Because…you…still like that brat,” he managed between moans. Why the hell was such a newb good at this?

“You said fights bring people closer but it didn’t!” Zhoumi snapped, nails digging into the other’s bare chest. “Kyu never came to see me! It’s been a week and he hasn’t even tried to talk to me. He doesn’t go to Math Team practices either. How the hell am I supposed to take that, Eunhyuk?!”

“Shit,” the older boy grunted, forcing Zhoumi to stop cutting into his skin, “cut your nails. And I don’t know why he hasn’t…but you weren’t wrong in approaching him about your feelings.” Eunhyuk threw his head back, releasing inside Zhoumi. His words were lost, eyes closed and lips parted.

Zhoumi collapsed against the older boy’s body, his muscles and limbs shuddering and growing limp from the force of his own coming. He forced himself to slide away from Eunhyuk’s wasted length, their sweaty, heated bodies a mess in the rumpled sheets. “I…I had to be wrong,” he breathed, gasping for more air. The familiar swelling of pain dared to bring more tears to his eyes. He pushed them back, pressing a wet, tongue-filled kiss to Eunhyuk’s lips. He felt the elicit fog blind his pain and a sigh rolled through the younger man.

Eunhyuk leaned away from the attack. “Zhoumi, you know you don’t want to do this,” he said softly, pushing the boy away from him firmly but gently.

Before an answer could come, there was a knock at the door. Zhoumi’s head shot up. “Who is it?” he asked tentatively.

“…Kyuhyun.”

Zhoumi’s heart sank and rose at the same time. “C-Coming!” he called, scrambling out of bed having utterly forgotten about Eunhyuk. The tall boy threw on clothes and shoes, hurrying to the door. He unlocked it, stepping out and shutting it behind him. “K-Kyuhyun…,” his voice cracked, eyes taking in the beautiful boy standing a bit away from him. Those gorgeous eyes and soft, deep voice were all Zhoumi could feel. And hell, he felt great. Why was there so much happiness at the sight of Kyuhyun?

“Can we talk for while…?” Kyuhyun murmured, offering his hand to Zhoumi.

The older boy took it readily, eyes red with brimming tears. Had he really been waiting so many days for that moment? “Sure,” he mumbled.

They walked up to the deserted rooftop of the second-year dorms. Kyuhyun turned around to face Zhoumi. “I’m sorry for treating you like that. And you have to believe me about the roommate thing. The two of us have always been looking out for each other and the only way I could get him to take his medication was that way. If I had meant to do something with him…well,” Kyuhyun blushed or perhaps it was because he was cold, “I wouldn’t have left the door unlocked. But I wouldn’t do anything with him! I…I feel so thrilled when you’re around Zhoumi. No one else has ever made me feel like that. I want to be with you. I don’t want to be break up. I still want to be your boyfriend.”

Tears spilled down Zhoumi’s cheeks and he covered his face. There were plenty of things he wanted to tell Kyuhyun but it was all too good to be true. He needed to have something anchoring him to earth, to the people of sin. Kyuhyun’s eyes widened in alarm and he hurried over to hug Zhoumi, tenderly stroking the slim man’s back. “Why are you crying, Mimi? Did I say something wrong?” Kyuhyun murmured against his ear. “I’m sorry…I’m really sorry for all of it. I care about you. I really do.” Kyuhyun led the other boy to a wall, sitting them both down. He kept his arms around Zhoumi, comforting the crying boy.

“You really mean it?” Zhoumi whimpered, fighting back the joyous sobs.

“Sorry…,” Kyuhyun said in a pained voice, tightening his hold around the other, “I mean it with all my heart, okay? So please stop crying. I don’t want you to be sad,” he said with a slight smile, leaning his forehead against Zhoumi’s.

“I’m happy,” Zhoumi murmured, kissing Kyuhyun’s lips, “I’m so happy that tears are coming,” he laughed, wiping at the salty liquid. “I didn’t know that fighting could make us this happy…”

“I didn’t either,” Kyuhyun said, pressing kisses to the other lips, cheeks and jaw. He pulled Zhoumi into his lap, too happy to think about the cold biting at them. This was a good moment. Somehow he had managed to drag their relationship out of the gutter. Kyuhyun didn’t know such a thing was possible. But here he was with Zhoumi back in his arms so sweetly in his embrace. “You really do make my heart beat faster,” Kyuhyun sighed, before slipping his tongue into Zhoumi’s mouth and tugging the older boy flush against his body. He felt it in his bones. The words would come to him. He was able to say it. Pulling away a bit, Kyuhyun brushed some of the other’s hair out of his face and said with the clearest voice, “I want to have sex with you. You said that if I could say it, you’d know we were ready, right?” Kyuhyun leaned forward to kiss the slender boy again.

Images flashed through Zhoumi’s mind and he jerked away from Kyuhyun. Deep guilt flooded every part of his body. So this was the anchor. This was the price for getting to be with the person you cared most for? Zhoumi’s face contorted in regret, jaw muscles tightening. “Uhm…I’m not ready,” he breathed, hoping Kyuhyun couldn’t tell what was written so blatantly on his face. “Please understand Kyu. I know I said that when you could say it we would…but—”

Kyuhyun looked thoughtful for only a moment but then he was leading Zhoumi close to him again, holding the older boy’s head against his shoulder. “It’s alright. We can talk about it now though. I’ll wait. It’s not a big deal,” he chuckled, kissing Zhoumi’s soft hair, “I just meant to say that I’m ready and whenever you are, we’ll move forward.”

“Okay…” He was happy that Kyuhyun couldn’t see his face at that moment, for if he had, the boy wouldn’t have been able to mistake the vicious guilt.

***

The clock read half past 6 in the evening and Kyuhyun still hadn’t returned. Ryeowook had finished his homework quite a while ago and now he was just sitting around, unsure what to do with himself. Tonight was the real performance but how could he go when Kyuhyun would surely come back any moment?

Abruptly the door was thrown open. Ryeowook seriously needed to start locking that. Whenever someone walked through there, problems followed. Standing in the threshold was Sungmin, dressed in all his glorious Tech Crew black and grinning at Ryeowook. “What are you doing Wookie?” he demanded, pulling the boy to his feet. “We’re going to the musical!”

“W-What are you talking about?” Ryeowook asked, stumbling out of the room with his friend. He managed to shut the door before leaving, but locking it hadn’t been possible.

Sungmin didn’t answer Ryeowook; he just kept dragging him down the hall and out of the building. They ran through the campus, Sungmin at times turning back and smiling at the other boy who would in turn laugh. No one paid them any mind, except to give a warm look at the cute display of affection. Now who would seriously be offended by seeing such innocence in a place so lacking of it?

Ryeowook caught up to Sungmin as they slowed before the back entrance to the auditorium. “Hey…if Kyuhyun had been in the room how would you have handled that?”

Sungmin shrugged, opening the Tech Shop door and walking inside. “Well I saw him just now buying a ticket to the show and he was with…a friend of his I think. Anyway, I figured that that would mean you’re sitting around alone.” He hadn’t let go of Ryeowook’s hand yet, leading him like a child through the Tech Shop, “And so I decided this would be the perfect chance to kidnap you.”

“Kidnap?” Ryeowook repeated.

“Yeah, kidnapped you from the big, bad, wolf Kyuhyun,” Sungmin scoffed, joining the already assembled crew. Mir nodded at their arrival, acting as cool as ever. “Yo Mir,” he patted the other boy’s shoulder, “I got Wookie!”

“Great, he’s got legit clothes this time right?” Mir remarked, sending a teasing look Ryeowook’s way. He smiled so faintly it could’ve been a shadowy impression. “Make sure you give him a black sweatshirt or something. He’ll stick out in those clothes.”

“Oh right…,” Sungmin mumbled.

From behind, Ryeowook felt a heavy jacket fall around his shoulders, the former wearer’s body heat still deeply coating the inside of it. He looked up and blushed. “Yesung-hyung!” he exclaimed. The third year was already handsome…but then he was dressed in the Phantom’s to-die-for gentleman’s clothing and mask. How much more blinding could Yesung be?

“Finally showed up for club?” the hyung stated, ruffling Ryeowook’s hair. “You can use my jacket. Don’t get it dirty though.”

“G…G-Good luck with your performance!” Ryeowook called, pulling the large sweater closer around him. Yesung nodded, silently waving as he passed by. Ryeowook turned shining eyes to Sungmin, tugging on the latter’s sleeve. “He’s so cool!!”

The dark haired boy raised an eyebrow, frowning at his sparkly eyed friend. “You fanboy over Yesung-hyung, don’t you?”

“He’s so cool!!” Ryeowook repeated, adding emphasis.

Sungmin grimaced, sighing and excusing the reaction. “We have to get up to the Sound Booth.” Mir nodded, walking towards the exit already. The one being bothered by Ryeowook followed, leading a babbling fanboy by the hand.

 

The performance went off without any hitches. Yesung performed at a godly-level. The other actors were good…but they were nothing in comparison. The way his voice would simply carry through the souls of all its listeners…so beautiful…

Well, that’s how Ryeowook saw it anyway.

They were in the final scene with Yesung once again saying goodbye to his love. Ryeowook watched carefully, listening to the third-year’s sorrow. Wasn’t their love somewhat demented? The girl…she had played around far too much. Couldn’t she have fallen for the Phantom? Why did love stories have to end in tragedy to be praised? Were happy endings unable to leave an impression? Ryeowook always hated that part of the musical. It left you with a yearning to see the Phantom and his love together and yet…you also wanted to see the girl finding happiness in a man who she had known for so long. Why had she even given the Phantom hope by being kind? Ugh…Ryeowook felt a headache coming on. This was too much stress and it wasn’t even his life.

Sungmin entwined his fingers with Ryeowook’s, urging the boy to stand. The latter looked curiously at his friend. “What are you doing?” he mouthed as the Sound Booth door was opening just a bit. Mir glanced at them, flashing thumbs up, “I can handle it” sign. With that, Sungmin shut the door to the booth, leading the way down the hall.

“Where are we going?” Ryeowook asked in a normal voice, clearing his throat. Wow, whispering sure made your voice strange.

Sungmin opened a non-descript door, pulling Ryeowook inside as he flicked on the lights. A familiar set of ladder holds faced the pair. “Climb, Wookie,” Sungmin ordered, smiling widely.

“But…,” Ryeowook paused, considering how much time arguing would waste, “Okay.” He carefully swallowed and then ascended the metal bars, holding his breath as he hurried to get to the edge of the Cat Walk – the space for overhanging lights in the center of the auditorium that allowed for extra light exposure on stage.

He gasped quietly, scrambling to get far away from the ledge. Sungmin’s head appeared a few moments later and he swung over, joining Ryeowook. The pair crawled over to the dark railing so they could see the performance. Yesung had entered the final song, singing with all his might.

Ryeowook watched in amazement. He would never get over the beauty and power behind that young voice. Beside him, Sungmin watched as well, smiling at his hyung. There was definitely something magical about the way he belted out notes. Yesung brought a composer’s mechanical notes to life with his voice, just as an actor brought to life the words of an author.

They watched in silence for a bit, both enraptured by the performance. But then they were watching the Phantom and his love saying their final goodbye. Ryeowook felt that clenching in his chest and that all too familiar frustration.

But for Sungmin…he saw only the moment where true love parts ways. It was sort of sad…but at the same time, for who was it sad? The demented Phantom had lost to a normal, wonderful man in the fight for love; the wonderful man had won the hand of his beloved and saved her from the clutches of a dark enigma. Sungmin peered over at his companion. “I’m your Raoul, huh?” he said softly, reaching over to caress Ryeowook’s face.

“Hmm?” Ryeowook turned his head, meeting the warm, gentle lips of Sungmin.

He pulled away just a bit, eyes steadily gazing at the other. “The Phantom…he’s so much more alluring, isn’t he?”

 

 


	21. Chapter 21

Ryeowook touched his lips as he lay in bed, a blush creeping over his features when he thought about what Sungmin had done two days earlier on the Cat Walk. He wasn’t really mad…instead he was…confused. Why had Sungmin done that?

Weren’t they friends? Or was he missing something? Oh, well maybe it was because of the atmosphere. Below them the sorrowful song of the Phantom played to the audience’s souls. Sungmin and Ryeowook had been hidden away in a dark place, just the two of them with their gentle hearts so near…it was reaction. Perhaps that was the true reason.

It _had_ to be the reason. Otherwise, how could he explain the yearning to kiss Sungmin back? Ryeowook blushed harder, covering his face with a pillow. This was strange. It was hormones right? No one else had ever kissed him except for Kyuhyun and Kyuhyun never kissed him in a romantic way…did he?

Abruptly Ryeowook sat up in bed, utterly puzzled. He climbed out of bed, ascending the ladder to Kyuhyun’s bunk. The other boy should’ve been asleep…but Ryeowook needed at least one answer.

“Hey, hey Kyu…,” Ryeowook whispered urgently, blinking away the tiredness of his eyes. But…no one was there. His heart beat faster and he quickly looked around, accidentally hurting his neck in the process. Ryeowook groaned in pain and he dropped to the floor, rubbing the back of his head sorely. _More importantly though…where’s Kyuhyun?_

Not bothering to hide his movements anymore, Ryeowook walked over to the light switch, flicking it on. The other boy seriously wasn’t there! Where had he gone so late at night? Ryeowook was sure he had been asleep… He checked his phone, the window displaying: 12:45 PM. Yes…this was really strange.

Hopefully Kyuhyun wasn’t staying up late at the library or something. He was such a workaholic sometimes. Pfft, and _he_ was always telling Ryeowook not to overwork himself. The boy pulled on some sweats, shoes and a hoodie before leaving and locking the room. He would just go check the library on the first floor. After all, where else could Kyuhyun be?

Ryeowook descended the staircase, shuffling down the chilly hallway to the double doors leading into the first year dorm’s personal library. There were dark wooden shelves lining all of the walls and creating shadowy mazes in the already eerie place. Ryeowook had heard a rumor about the first year’s library. Apparently there were a bunch of ghosts of desolate teenage spirits roaming around during the Witching Hour. Spooky stuff, but more on that later.

He ventured further into the cold space, exploring the antique are with his eyes. “Kyu, are you in here?” he called quietly, voice echoing maddeningly.

A hand came down on his shoulder and the highest, loudest scream burst from Ryeowook’s mouth. He yelled and shook, throwing his arms in every direction. “Calm down!” a familiar voice shouted, covering Ryeowook’s mouth and dragging him over to the lit area of the library. There were some books laid out on a wooden table, along with an MP3 and phone.

“Huh?” Ryeowook moved away from the person, turning around and smiling in relief. “Oh, it’s you Mir. Why didn’t you say so?”

The other boy’s mouth twitched irritably. “Seriously? You screamed like a freaking banshee.” He stuffed his hands in his pockets, flipping hair out of his face and marking Ryeowook with a curious look. “Why are you here so late?”

“I thought Kyuhyun may have been here…,” Ryeowook explained worriedly, “I woke up with a question for him because I couldn’t sleep but he wasn’t there.”

Mir nodded in understanding, walking over to his scattered belongings and textbooks. “Well no one but me has been here. I’m not sure where your friend is, but I can tell you that he’s probably not in any of the reference areas of the dorm. I’ve been around here all night.”

“Do you have any idea where he could’ve gone this late?” Ryeowook prompted, eyebrows knit.

Something flickered across Mir’s face and he quickly pulled a folded note out of his pocket. He unfolded it, handing it to Ryeowook. The latter studied the obscure drawing, just becoming more confused by it. Mir was already explaining though, “Some third year named Kangin approached me when I was using my lunch break to study for an overseas program exam. He said I looked tired and if I ever wanted to take a break, follow that map to a fun place.” Mir shrugged, “I just thought it was a creepy, pedo-pick-up-line.”

Ryeowook read the three letters written at the bottom of the map. “K…U…G…?”

***

The trio met in Sungmin’s room the following weekend, looking at the crude map drawing for probably the hundredth time that week. Ryeowook had pretty much suppressed the kissing incident with Sungmin. After seeing Kyuhyun disappear last Sunday, his mind had become set on figuring out what was happening. Ryeowook had also taken the liberty to check Kyuhyun’s bed every night following the incident and found to his growing anxiety, the other boy wasn’t in the room three out of the five week days. So where was he off to?

After hearing about it, Sungmin had become interested as well. Maybe this was his chance to expose Kyuhyun as the bastard he was. But more than that little perk, Sungmin wanted to find out what “KUG” meant. He had never heard of such a thing, so over the course of the week he asked around a bit, receiving little to no definite answer.

However, whenever the subject came up, the posed person would tense and become defensive. It was a strange reaction to say the least. Why was everyone so hostile about “KUG”? What the hell was it?

Mir, for his part, hadn’t been approached by any more people, including Kangin. So his knowledge was limited to that little piece of paper with its badly drawn map. To be fair, Mir didn’t think much of it and still hadn’t until his two friends (?) started obsessing. They were so bent on finding out what Kangin’s map meant and what “KUG” stood for. And apparently Mir didn’t have a say in whether or not he accompanied them on that night’s mission.

“Won’t the Hound be upset if you’re not at home?” Sungmin remarked, still staring at the map.

Ryeowook shook his head, sitting on the edge of Sungmin’s bed while Sungmin sat on his chair and while Mir leaned against a wall. They three of them had effectively kicked Sungmin’s roommate out for the night if anyone worried for the poor sap. “He doesn’t know since he said he’ll be studying with a friend for Math Team. He’s finally going back to practice,” Ryeowook said, not realizing that a sigh had followed the statement.

Sungmin cocked an eyebrow, lips curling in a mocking grin. “You sound relieved. How weird, Wookie. Don’t you adore your Kyu or is he getting overbearing?”

“W-Well I’m just happy that he’s gone back to club practices,” Ryeowook explained hastily, his face reddening. Had he really sounded so happy at the notion of having Kyuhyun around less?

“Focus,” Mir sighed, closing his eyes briefly, “we don’t have all night.”

“Oh-ho, even Mr. Cool Mir is excited,” Sungmin remarked, “Okay, well let’s head out then.” He stood up, stretching out a bit and offering Ryeowook a hand off the bed. The latter took it, stepping close to Sungmin for a moment. In that extended moment, Sungmin leaned close, whispering, “Whatever happens, count on me, remember okay?”

Ryeowook nodded, for a second recalling their kiss. His face colored and he stepped back, scurrying towards the door and dragging Mir after him. “Let’s go, it’s already 11!”

Without further ado, the trio sneaked through the dark halls, descended the stairs and slipped out the back door. Their movements were quick and stealthy – a natural ability when they had all grown up moving from place to place, home to home, wacko to wacko.

Sungmin had memorized the map and had a pretty good idea of where he was going but at the same time…it was sort of strange. There had to be a mistake with the directions because it sent them into the forest. What could be in a forest? Was there some crazy _underground lair?_ Hah, that was impossible. What sort of world did they living in if such a thing actually existed?

After several minutes of tentative forest treading, they stopped in a somewhat clear area – the place the map indicated. Ryeowook stepped forward, exploring the sky and blackness with a cautious interest. He moved forward a little more and stopped, feeling like the ground was giving. Very slowly, he bent down, pushing on the grass. His eyes grew and he tugged on Sungmin’s pant leg. “I think this grass is fake!” he exclaimed in a hushed voice.

“Oh you’ve gotta be kidding me,” Sungmin muttered, stomping hard on the trap door.

There was second’s hesitation but then the grass was groaning and pushing out in a perfect square door. A blond boy peeked out with his angular, thin face gazing up at them. “Can I have your entrance fee kiddos?” he prompted, sticking one hand out.

“Entrance fee?” Sungmin repeated, puzzled.

Mir reached into his pocket, pulling out the map and placing it in the blond man’s hand. The bouncer looked at it and then crumpled it, stepping aside for them to come in. He smirked at the three boys, saying, “Enjoy yourselves ‘kay? And remember, first years aren’t allowed to drink anything but soda and water. None of that alcoholic shit, kiddies. By the way, I’m Eunhyuk, co-caretaker of Kangin’s Underground, or KUG.”

_Oh, so that’s what it stood for!_

“Thank you,” Ryeowook replied smiling at the third year, Eunhyuk.

Eunhyuk blinked, surprised. It wasn’t everyday a new guest replied so readily. “You’re welcome. What’re your names?” he asked, pulling out a touch screen phone, “I have to add your names to the roster,” Eunhyuk stated, flashing the screen filled with two hundred plus names already.

“…Sungmin.”

“Ryeowook!”

“…Mir…”

“Okay, gotcha,” Eunhyuk grinned, “have fun!” He waved them off as he walked back to a booth where a handsome man was sitting with two drinks.

Mir nudged his two companions, indicating with a subtle nod of his head at the handsome man with Eunhyuk. “That’s Kangin.” They made an “Oh” sound which was lost in the club’s heavy music and talking.

They found an empty booth, settling down and taking in KUG. How were they going to find anything out? There were so many people…and all of them really didn’t know what personal space was. The vision before them was basically a black blob swaying back and forth. Ryeowook glanced at the other two to see if they were willing to go into that mass; they weren’t. He couldn’t blame them. It was sort of scary looking. In fact, he couldn’t imagine Kyuhyun being in there either. This probably wasn’t the right place.

Sungmin was thinking the same thing of course. He couldn’t see that uptight hound with all of his lying and shit being caught dead in such a touchy place. Sure, Kyuhyun was a bastard and needed to get his brain checked and his heart thawed but he wasn’t a party animal right? C’mon, what _math_ nerd spent their nights grinding on a sweaty dirty dance floor?

Mir really hated that place. He didn’t know who Kyuhyun was but from Sungmin’s stories he couldn’t imagine such a jerk hanging around a place where annoying people would reside. Plus, who in general would go to such a place for fun? Okay, ignoring all of the writhing, gross bodies, who would seriously waste away their lives in an underground facility? It was sort of shady if you asked Mir.

But then Sungmin saw it. In a booth to the opposing side of the cramped dance floor was a face that had been permanently engraved in his memory. Except…that face was sort of obscured by another’s. They were kissing deeply and probably wetly but Sungmin couldn’t and didn’t want to see. Their hands fondled one another everywhere; Kyuhyun’s disappearing from time to time underneath the black top table. His partner backed away every time Kyuhyun most likely touched his lower half and laughed, pulling him in for another kiss.

“What are you staring at Minnie?” Ryeowook inquired, leaning over to follow the trail.

Sungmin covered the other’s eyes, shoving him back against the leather cushions. “N-Nothing! I just saw something weird and I guess I was gaping. Sorry for the false alarm.” _Why am I protecting that son of a bitch?_ “I doubt the Hound is here. He’d never be caught dead in a people polluted place like this, don’t you agree Wookie?” _Seriously why am I saving that rat bastard’s sorry ass?_ “So let’s just go, alright?” Sungmin took Ryeowook’s hand, pulling him towards the door, Mir trailed behind them, keeping as far away from the grinding people as possible.

Sungmin stumbled, feeling someone catch him from the crowd. His hand was still strongly wrapped around Ryeowook’s making sure they were separated. “Thanks,” Sungmin called to his helping hand. But the hand wasn’t as helping as he thought.

It dragged him onto the dance floor, into the sea of gyrating beings. Sungmin gagged at the heat, wincing and trying to pull away from the incessant person. Ryeowook had, unfortunately, been pulled in as well, fighting through the crowd to stay near his friend.

Mir tried to cut into the throng but then he saw the lustful looks raking his body and disgusted shudders rolled through him. Maybe the two guys would be alright on their own, y’know, aside from the fact that they were just dragged into the pits of hell. Mir backed away, watching for any kidnappers in the black blob. Just as he thought everything was okay, a number of hands grabbed him, jerking him into the mob. He shouted incoherently but stumbled into the pit nonetheless, getting touched and squeezed in the worst places. “Ah fuck,” he muttered, fighting back as best he could, but they were stronger and bigger and quite frankly, determined.

 


	22. Chapter 22

Sungmin looked around as him and Ryeowook were brought to the center of a group of guys. They were of varying ages, the scarier ones being third years. Their bodies rubbed up against the two freshmen, smirks painted on their faces. They began touching the pair, sliding their large sweaty hands up, down and around their slender bodies.

“Hot damn, they’re cute up close,” one of the guys remarked, snickering as his hand found its way underneath Sungmin’s sweatshirt, “Hey Sungmin why don’t you make a sound with that cute voice of yours?” The boy used his free fingers to rub the younger boy’s inner thigh forcefully.

His friends had come to touch the unoccupied parts of him, fondling curves and stroking the boy’s chest through his sweater. Sungmin swung his arms angrily, glowering at the molesters. “Get off of me you freaks!” he roared, kicking the one who brushed his crotch. “I’m not a thing you can just play with!”

“Aw, he’s throwing a temper tantrum,” one of the offenders snickered, moving their hands to pull Sungmin’s clothing up, exposing his torso to the person directly facing him, “Hey Minho, why don’t you get a closer feel of him?”

The one named Minho smirked, leaning forward, “Sure, I’d—”

Ryeowook shoved in front of Sungmin, glaring at the attacker. “Don’t touch Minnie! You don’t even know him why are you doing this stuff to him?” he demanded.

“Wookie…,” Sungmin breathed, shocked to the core by his friend’s actions.

Minho shrugged casually; wrapping his arm around Ryeowook’s lower back and forcing him flush against his own body. “Whatever, both of you are cute. I don’t mind either one,” he remarked, one leg pushing between Ryeowook’s, making the latter hover off the ground in an awkward hanging position. “You’re the more effeminate one right?” Minho asked, dragging his tongue across Ryeowook’s neck. The younger boy yelped, blushing and pushing Minho away with his unoccupied hand.

“Don’t touch him!” Sungmin yelled, attempting to punch the older one in the face. One of the crowd members stopped the fist though, pushing Sungmin back. That didn’t stop him though; he just pushed forward again, trying to free Ryeowook. “I said don’t touch him you freak!”

This time the hands that stopped him held on, shoving him back roughly into another person. He wrapped his arms around Sungmin from behind, lifting the young man off the ground and propping him up on an upraised knee. “Hey there,” the older boy murmured, nibbling Sungmin’s ear as he ran his hands over the slender boy’s upper half.

“Stop it!” Sungmin demanded, wriggling against the offender.

A moan rang through Sungmin’s ear and the boy immediately stopped moving. “Aw, no more struggling?” the guy mumbled, chuckling and licking his jaw, “I really liked it.”

“What is wrong with all of you?” Sungmin shouted at the top of his lungs, but the roar of the music beat him down. He pushed the person’s face away from his neck, receiving only more tongue action against his palm. “I’M NOT EVEN TRYING TO TURN YOU ON!” Sungmin tried to head butt the person but missed and let out a frustrated groan.

His eyes wandered over to Ryeowook and his heart nearly stopped. The other boy was red faced even in the dark room Sungmin could tell. Minho had taken the liberty of kissing the boy as he continued feeling his slender body up. A trail of saliva slipped from the connected mouths and Sungmin felt the fury burst from him.

“DON’T TOUCH HIM!” Sungmin tore out of the grip, adrenaline pumping rapidly through his veins as he knocked both of them over. He pushed Ryeowook out of the surprised loosened grip and went on to punch the older boy in the face. A momentary feeling of pride washed over him. It had taken too many tries to punch that rotten molester. Sungmin attempted to punch Minho again but was stopped by a larger, strong hand. He whipped around, freezing as he saw Kangin standing over him.

Mir was behind the muscular third year, looking rather upset and red. Kangin on the other hand was glowering at Minho and Sungmin. “Both of you, up and in my office,” he ordered in a low voice, releasing Sungmin and stalking off.

Minho smirked up at Sungmin, patting the first year’s head mock-sweetly. “Aw, getting in trouble just for me? You’re such a cutie, Sungmin.”

“Shut up,” Sungmin snapped, climbing off the other boy and grabbing Ryeowook’s hand. He pulled the uncomfortable looking boy to his feet and hugged him tightly. “Are you okay Wookie? I’m so sorry this happened,” he mumbled close to Ryeowook’s ear.

“It’s okay, they were doing things to you too,” Ryeowook answered, sniffling and returning the tight hug. “I’m sorry you’re in trouble…”

“No big deal,” Sungmin laughed, “it’s not like it’s Teukie-hyung or the administration punishing me. Otherwise all of us would be in deep—”

“Let’s go, _Sungminnie_ ,” Minho interrupted, grabbing the other boy and yanking him away from Ryeowook easily. When Sungmin fought back, Minho tossed the boy over his shoulder, carrying him off in the direction Kangin had gone. Before they completely disappeared, Minho turned back and smirked at Ryeowook. “You make the cutest sounds when you’re kissing, thought you’d like to know that.” He winked and walked off with a raging Sungmin.

Ryeowook blinked several times, unsure what to think or do. Mir led him off the dance floor so the guests could continue partying. As they escaped the mess, Ryeowook glanced over at Mir, saying, “I know this sounds bad…”

“What?” Mir prompted, quickly working his way over to the exit where Eunhyuk was waiting.

“…I can’t tell if that guy, Minho, is bad or not.” At Mir’s odd look, Ryeowook went on, “Well, he wasn’t actually mean…he never did anything that hurt. It was more like…he was wild…wild but had a sense of right and wrong.”

“Yeah, because kissing and molesting people is right,” Mir snorted, nodding at Eunhyuk as they ascended the steps into the cold night.

Ryeowook frowned, unable to find the right words. “He’s…hmm…playful.”

***

Minho tossed Sungmin onto the couch in Kangin’s office, proceeding to walk over to the fuming KUG owner and wrapping his arms around those broad shoulders. “Aw, don’t be mad Kangin,” he said, pouting and squeezing the larger boy, “I didn’t do anything _bad_ , per se. And if you’re worried about my face don’t because that cutie doesn’t punch very hard.”

“Get off,” Kangin ordered, hands curling into fists.

“Oh,” Minho threw his hands up, dancing around the angry fellow and snickering as he stepped out of grabbing distance. He flung himself into a chair, one arm thrown over the back. “So what did you wanna talk about Kanginnie? I’ve gotta a hot date tonight so I don’t wanna keep him waiting.”

“How can you have a date at this hour?” Kangin sighed, rubbing his head like a tired parent.

Minho leaned forward, elbows propped on knees. A feral grin spread across his face, eyes twinkling with a lustful secret. “You _really_ wanna know?”

“Never mind,” Kangin reprimanded himself.  His eyes turned to Sungmin who was sitting in silent anger on the couch. “You, what’s your name?”

“Sungmin.”

“Why did you start a fight in my club?” Kangin asked.

Sungmin jumped to his feet, pointing at Minho who was smirking so freaking confidently. “That asshole was harassing me and my friend too! I couldn’t do anything but that because he wouldn’t listen no matter what I said!”

Kangin raised an eyebrow at Minho who simply shrugged and said, “They’re so _cute_ Kanginnie! You don’t even know! If he wasn’t ready to rip my face off I’m sure you’d agree with me. Besides, it wasn’t like we were humping on the dance floor – though you should seriously tell some people to stop doing that – I just kissed his little friend. And damn was he adorable.” Minho licked his lips, corner of his mouth turning up.

“You’re disgusting!” Sungmin snapped at the other boy.

“How am I disgusting?” Minho drawled, marking the dark haired other with a lazy stare, “Don’t you agree that he’s adorable? And haven’t you kissed him too? You should know what kinds of sounds he can make. _So_ yummy, y’know?”

“First years are such handfuls these days,” Kangin sighed, exasperated. “I wish Jungsu still helped out with this stuff…”

“You’re a first year?” Sungmin gasped, covering his mouth as he gazed at Minho.

The latter nodded once, grinning. “Aw, you thought I was older? No worries Sungminnie, I’ll be around for three great years and we’ll become the best of friends, hmm? Preferably with less clothes,” Minho added, dodging Sungmin’s high kick. “Oh, flexible, that’ll make things more fun when we’re at it.”

“This is what I’m talking about!” Sungmin shouted, grabbing Minho’s collar, jerking the other boy out of the chair with some effort.

At that range Minho pecked Sungmin’s lips, snickering and blocking an angry flying fist. “Why are you so violent anyway? It’s not like I’ve done anything that horrible. You’re just overreacting because you like that little Ryeowook kid.”

“ENOUGH.”

Both of them turned to Kangin, seeing the third year out of his seat, nostrils flaring. Sungmin released Minho out of fear and stepped back. The latter gulped, slowly backing away from the muscular, manly man.

The door to the office quietly clicked and the three figures looked up at the arrival. A slender boy stepped into the room, shutting the door behind him. His sweater was loose and knee length, colored an attractive red which was matched with white jeans. Glasses were perched on his nose, the black frame matching the dark color of his hair. He looked at the faces and smiled. “Good evening, Kangin told me there are some problems here?” Teukie-hyung prompted kindly.

“Thank you for coming,” Kangin breathed, collapsing in his chair and raking a hand through hair. “These little brats are such a handful. I don’t know how you can handle them so well.”

“What’s the problem?” Teukie-hyung asked, leaning against the front of the desk.

“He’s molesting his peers on the dance floor!” Sungmin blurted.

“Well he’s being violent!” Minho retorted.

“Oh my,” Teukie-hyung murmured, eyebrows rising, “Minho you really shouldn’t push other peoples buttons like that. It’s good to be open and express yourself but you should remember personal space.”

Minho’s face colored and he looked down irritably. “He’s overreacting though…,” he whined quietly, shuffling his feet like a child.

“Well how would you feel if someone you didn’t know came up and started kissing you and touching you in ways that you didn’t like?” the president stated, touching Minho’s shoulder gently. “It’s not appropriate, even in a place like KUG.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Kangin muttered frowning.

“Is this really the time?” Teukie-hyung hissed, effectively shutting the pouting club owner up. “And Sungmin, really, I know you’re upset with the way you’ve been treated but violence simply shows your lack of culture. People only throw punches and kicks when they know they’re unable to fight with words. It’s a matter of maturity and intellect which I know you have.”

This is why everyone hated being lectured by Teukie-hyung. He never sugar-coated anything and he apparently didn’t know how to yell at people either. You were left with the inability to argue or get mad. All of his arguments were so personal there was no way to insist you were right. The damn leader had gotten to know his underclassmen and peers far too well if you asked Sungmin…or anyone for that matter.

“Yeah I know…,” Sungmin mumbled, feeling the shame sinking in.

“Good boys,” Teukie-hyung praised, chuckling softly and ruffling their hair, “Now if you want to go back and dance some more, well, you’ll have to talk to Young—ah, Kangin.”

Minho and Sungmin glanced at Kangin who said, “You’ve both got a warning. If either of you make a mess of KUG again, I swear I’ll make the rest of your time in high school a living hell.” The first years nodded vigorously, waiting to be dismissed. It was scary having Teukie-hyung and Kangin together; it was like the perfect combination of threatening and shaming.

They stumbled out of the office as quickly as possible, slamming the door shut behind them. Sungmin immediately glared at Minho who in turn smiled mock-sweetly and blew a kiss. “You’re so aggravating!” Sungmin growled, whipping around and stalking off towards the exit.

“Let’s do something next time, ‘kay? I wanna hear what kind of sounds you make!” Minho called, laughing softly, a smile on his lips. “Adorable…”

 


	23. Chapter 23

Ryeowook breathed deeply, taking in the smell of maple syrup and the late fall breeze. It was the first time he had had a chance to pause and take it all in. Things were far too hectic. Since the night so long ago at KUG, Ryeowook hadn’t breathed figuratively.

The amount of socializing time had been reduced to nearly zero, therefore avoiding any severe conflicts between Sungmin and Kyuhyun as far as Ryeowook was concerned. He wasn’t positive how they were when faced alone, but then again, how often would they be caught alone together?

However…Ryeowook gulped, all of the problems from mid-October coming back. He blushed when he thought about what happened with Sungmin at the musical. But then he almost fainted at remembering the intense make-out session with Minho. What sort of person had Ryeowook become since entering high school? Since when did he get caught kissing strangers in dark clubs? Ryeowook covered his face miserably, bumping into someone.

“Ah sorry!” he said quickly, lowering his head in apology.

“Uh, it’s cool Ryeowook.”

“Mir!” Ryeowook exclaimed, smiling and patting the other boy’s shoulders. “I haven’t seen you in forever!”

The cool boy scoffed, pulling his green scarf down so his voice wasn’t muffled. “I don’t think any of us have seen each other recently. I’ve been living in the library pretty much.”

“For someone so cool you sure study a lot,” Sungmin interrupted, appearing beside Ryeowook. He hugged the latter happily, smiling in his fan service sort of way. “Wookie! We can finally play around! Y’know, until Christmas when we have to take exams again,” Sungmin murmured, frowning darkly. “We should complain to Teukie-hyung, maybe he’ll understand.”

“Doubt it,” Mir remarked, pulling the scarf back over the lower half of his face and falling in step with them as Ryeowook and Sungmin began walking towards the Dining Hall.

There was a huge End of Midterms Feast for the student body which doubled as a Thanksgiving celebration. Although most people stuck around for the holiday, some didn’t and therefore the school felt it necessary to combine the two occasions since well, the school wasn’t all that rich. They had money, but not enough to spare for two such large banquets.

“Aren’t you going to join the Hound for dinner?” Sungmin prompted, still holding Ryeowook’s arm cutely. If anyone had been close enough to hear their conversation though, it would be obvious the physical touching wasn’t much more than what it looked like.

Ryeowook shook his head, already having given up on correcting Sungmin’s insulting nickname for Kyuhyun. “He’s not feeling well so he’s back in the dorm room sleeping,” Ryeowook explained. “I’m just going to eat dinner and then bring him back some soup.”

“Yay!” Sungmin shouted, throwing his fist in the air, smiling. “We get Wookie for the night! And why don’t we get that little friend of yours, Henry right?”

“He’s gone back to Canada to see his family,” Ryeowook answered sadly. His expression quickly shifted though and he smiled at Sungmin, “But the three of us can have a lot of fun!” He looked at Mir who nodded subtly, opening the door to the bustling Dining Hall.

“Fun stuffing our faces,” Sungmin added, picking his way through the large room and finding a table in one of the smaller, quieter rooms. He sat down at a table with a view to the red forest, all of its leaves already falling away. “Wow, this is much nicer than the main room,” Sungmin muttered, looking around, “I wonder why—” he cut himself off, realizing who the other occupants of the room were. He jabbed his finger at the attractive group of boys sitting at a table diagonal to their own. “MOLESTER!”

Minho got up, making a flourish with his arms as he strode up to Sungmin and took the smaller boy in his arms. “You’re always so angry when you see me,” the handsome boy chuckled, hands slyly pushing the back of Sungmin’s shirt up, exposing the soft skin of his lower back. “But I think it’s pretty cute nonetheless.”

“Stop it!” Sungmin snapped, scrambling to get away from the touchy boy.

“Don’t do that, please,” Ryeowook chimed in, stepping between them and putting his arms up. “We’ve had peace for the past month, why can’t we keep on that road…?”

Minho snickered, snatching Ryeowook’s chin and leaning down. “Oh? Tests are over, cutie. There’s no reason to stay away now. I mean, what else should I do to occupy myself besides chasing the cutest people in this school?”

“Why are you always hitting on both of us?” Sungmin demanded, pulling Ryeowook away from the taller boy’s hand.

“Do you want me to focus on one of you because I could almost guarantee I’d pick you Sungminnie,” Minho smiled overly sweetly, eyes sparkling in that devilish way.

Another boy appeared, hanging over Minho’s shoulders. His hair was long and blonde, curving around his face in luscious layers. A thin sweater slipped off one shoulder, baring the slim figure. Dark eyes scanned over Sungmin and Ryeowook, eventually finding their way to the one standing in the back, Mir. “Hey~ Mir,” the boy greeted, waving a bit and winking, “you haven’t come back to KUG…we should definitely hook up sometime. I’m getting bored of Minho.”

Sungmin and Ryeowook whipped around to look at their friend in confusion. Mir covered his face more, eyes trailing off into the distance. “I don’t know him,” Mir stated flatly, “I’m gonna find someone to bring us food. He walked off quickly, abandoning the conversation expertly.

“Why can’t we do that?” Ryeowook whispered to Sungmin.

“We’re losers?” Sungmin answered, shrugging helplessly.

“Minho…isn’t Mir just so gorgeous?” Taemin sighed, eyes following the retreating figure.

“Your taste is so weird,” Minho rolled his eyes, turning his attention back to the cute boys. “Hey, why don’t all of us eat together? After all, this entire room is empty. We should definitely join up, y’know they say the more the merrier.”

“Do you think he realizes I hate his guts?” Sungmin murmured to Ryeowook.

“Probably not,” the boy replied.

“I don’t take no for an answer,” Minho stated, smirking, “how do you think I got to play tonsil hockey with Ryeowook?”

The one in question blushed harshly, unable to argue. “…Let’s just eat with them,” Ryeowook said, pulling on Sungmin’s hand, “or else he’ll keep talking.”

“Oh smart and yummy! Well then let’s combine tables, hmm?”

 


	24. Chapter 24

Zhoumi’s eyebrows knit as he said into the phone, “Are you sure you’re alright Kyu? Do you need me to bring you anything?”

“I’m fine,” Kyuhyun replied hoarsely, “Talk to you tomorrow or something. Good night.”

The call ended without further ado.

The second year slipped the phone back in his pocket, sighing. Sometimes Kyuhyun could be so sweet and then other times he would be so distant. Wasn’t it normal to visit your lover when he was sick? At least that what Zhoumi had guess from the way other relationships were portrayed on television and around school.

“What’s wrong Zhoumi?” Eunhyuk asked, looking at the other boy across the dining table. Kangin was sitting with them but he had mysteriously disappeared after spotting Teukie-hyung through the doorway. Now the only ones actually eating at the table were the two of them.

Every time Zhoumi looked at Eunhyuk all he could see was that delicious body covered in sweat and releasing pheromones right and left. His mind recreated the image of the blonde groaning and writhing in pleasure as he thrust inside of Zhoumi. But after that explicit image came the guilt and regret and all that unhappy shit. Was he just a pervert, a sick, _sick_ bastard for still being attracted to someone’s body?

“Nothing,” Zhoumi replied to Eunhyuk, “Kyu’s just sick and he told me not to come over.” He swallowed a mouthful of sparkling cider, trying to force the thoughts of Eunhyuk and sex out of his mind. Since when was he such a pervert? Kyuhyun was enough for him…but at the same time, he wanted to have sex.

All because of that stupid decision a month ago, his teenage hormones had been awakened. Zhoumi couldn’t control the needs bubbling up in his body. He _needed_ to be with someone physically, preferably Kyuhyun…but every time he was about to tell his boyfriend he wanted to have sex too, the betrayal pounded in his heart and mind. There was no way he could do anything with Kyuhyun while he knew the truth. It was too painful imagining the heated expressions and loving murmurs and erotic moans…

“Yo, are _you_ catching a cold?” Eunhyuk pressed the back of his hand against Zhoumi’s forehead. “Your face is all red and you’re breathing kind of funny.”

“I’m fine,” Zhoumi sighed, backing away from Eunhyuk’s touch. What was wrong with him? This was so wrong. The thoughts coursing through his mind were sick and cruel. It was all physical though. It _had_ to be because the only one who made his heart soar was Kyuhyun. Eunhyuk was just able to make his real heart beat faster and his body heat up to momentous levels. But all of it…all of it was so bad. And Zhoumi absolutely loathed himself for feeling like it could possibly be okay to have a relationship like that with Eunhyuk.

“So how’re you and Kyuhyun doing these days?” Eunhyuk asked casually, taking a bite of his food and looking up at Zhoumi.

Why did he have to keep _talking?_ Just his voice was making the tall boy uncomfortable in his own skin. His mind kept morphing the sound… Zhoumi blinked, shaking away the thoughts best he could. He tried to imagine a sickly Kyuhyun and how much pain he must be in. That brought his hormones back down a bit, enough for him to look at Eunhyuk without seeing that disturbingly explicit image.

“We’re doing alright,” Zhoumi replied, “we’ve been busy but during the times we’ve been together things have been good between us. Thanks.”

“No problem,” Eunhyuk mumbled, swallowing his food, “just happy to hear that you guys are…seriously are you feeling alright? You’re getting really red.”

Zhoumi wanted to cry. He hated himself and he hadn’t even done anything yet but he already knew that he was going to. The plans had been perfecting themselves for the past few weeks and there was no way he could keep it in any longer. A little bit more and his higher thinking would turn to mush and the stupid primal instincts would take charge full time. He couldn’t handle the yearning for touch anymore. He wanted Kyuhyun to be the one doing it but how could he ask that of someone so good when Zhoumi was so bad? That first fight had ruined and saved them simultaneously…is that how relationships worked? Was there really so much pain?

“No, I’m not okay,” Zhoumi sighed, the last bits of logical reasoning shutting down. “I’m so horny right now that I don’t even know what to do. I’ve been turned on for weeks now and I can’t do anything because…because…,” he shook his head, turning pleading eyes to Eunhyuk. “Please…Please help me.”

Eunhyuk stared at his friend for a long time, unsure what to make of the confession. What the hell happened to Zhoumi? Why was such a clean kid…becoming such a teenager? He slowly set his utensils down. “You…You know what you’re asking right?”

“Yes, yes I do,” Zhoumi said quickly, “I _need_ this Eunhyuk. You don’t understand…I’ve never wanted something so much. If I wasn’t so desperate do you think I would even say these words? Do you think I would jeopardize Kyuhyun for something on a whim?” He reached under the short table, brushing Eunhyuk’s knee with his hand. “Please don’t think anything less of me…just understand…maybe…?”

Eunhyuk sighed under his breath. How could he shoot down such a pitiful person? He got up, pulling Zhoumi to his feet as well before leading him out of the Dining Hall’s private room. “How long can you wait?” Eunhyuk asked.

“Can’t,” Zhoumi groaned in frustration, heart quickening, “anywhere, just please do it fast.”

They stumbled into a mainly deserted hall, finding a linen closet and shutting the door behind them. Zhoumi shoved Eunhyuk back against the door, kneeling down and unzipping the other boy’s pants rapidly. He stroked the member until it was hard, wrapping his mouth around it after. A low moan of relief sent vibrations around the length and Zhoumi closed his eyes, sliding the entire member into his mouth over and over again. His free hand moved down to take care of his own problem, delicious shudders rolling through his body at the completed sensations.

Eunhyuk was breathing harder, thrusting his hips forward into the hot cavern devouring him. “Oh fuck,” he groaned, fingers tangling in Zhoumi’s hair, “I forgot how good you were at this stuff.” He came inside the kneeling boy’s mouth, head thrown back in release. Zhoumi swallowed quickly, running his tongue all around the length before releasing it’s still semi-erect state. “Turn around, ass up,” Eunhyuk ordered impatiently, stroking himself back to hardness.

The other boy complied readily to the command, pushing his pants down and bracing himself against the shelves of towels and cloth. Zhoumi felt the tip touch his entrance and a grateful moan escaped his lips. Eunhyuk pushed inside, sliding deeper and deeper into the other. When he was fully inside, he curled his body around Zhoumi’s, nibbling and sucking at the latter’s neck and backside.

“Hurry up,” Zhoumi begged.

Eunhyuk thrust fast and hard, searching for the spot that would make the boy scream loudest. His fingers toyed with Zhoumi’s perky nipples, mouth still working at his throat and neck. Suddenly a lustful scream filled the air and Eunhyuk knew he had found it. Smirking he hit the spot over and over again, smothering the cries of pleasure in sloppy, wet kisses. Zhoumi didn’t hesitate to stick his tongue deep into the other mouth, in fact his entire body shivered with delight. It was too good having Eunhyuk fucking him so hard and in such a small space. The heat had gathered around them, creating a bubble of moans and sweat.

“I’m gonna come,” Eunhyuk grunted, reaching around and firmly stroking Zhoumi’s slick member. The boy was pushing back against his thrusting length at full speed, barely noticing the warm hand paying attention to his neglected member.

Zhoumi’s eyes burst open and he bit down on his lip, muffling as much of the moan as he could. Hot liquid spurted deep inside of him, filling his body like the finest drug in the world. Moments later he was wrapping his own hand around Eunhyuk’s, quickening the pace of stroking. Zhoumi leaned back against the other boy’s strong frame, panting beautifully with eyes closed. “Coming…,” he whispered hoarsely, body tightening as a release overcame him. Zhoumi collapsed fully back on his friend, feeling happy and revitalized. “So good…”

Eunhyuk could have considered his morals. But he didn’t. And that’s why he couldn’t deny a taken man’s pleas for sex. Fuck.

 


	25. Chapter 25

“…For the last time…STOP. STROKING. MY. THIGH.” Sungmin glared at Minho who just winked and snickered at the annoyance. “I sat down next to you not by choice! So stop doing whatever you please!”

“Guys…,” Ryeowook began meekly, raising his hand tentatively.

Mir tapped the intervener’s shoulder and shook his head in a sign of “Don’t Even Try.”

“Oh…,” Ryeowook mumbled, going back to eating. He would just let Sungmin argue. The boy seemed to enjoy fighting with Minho so what was the harm in letting him do so? Maybe they would get closer that way and the fighting would become more playful…well, Ryeowook could dream when it was Thanksgiving. He turned to Mir, attempting to start conversation but stopped when he saw the embarrassed expression on his face and the way he was shifting in his seat. Ryeowook frowned, about to ask why he was like that but then his eyes trailed down to the other boy’s lap and his face lit up like a Christmas tree. “I’m sorry Mir,” he squeaked, quickly eating the rest of his food and standing up.

“No Ryeowook—!” Mir began but Taemin was covering his mouth and smiling at Ryeowook.

“Oh are you going now?” the pretty boy inquired with an innocent grin.

“Uhm yeah,” Ryeowook nodded a bit and waved at his two occupied friends. Sungmin seemed to want to follow but when he headed off, Minho grabbed his arm, jerking him into his lap and holding him there. Ryeowook flushed, not understanding what was up with Thanksgiving. Maybe everyone was just crazed from not having to study anymore.

Mir was gazing after the departing boy with weak eyes. Ryeowook, for his part, didn’t notice.

 

Ryeowook carried the container of soup close to his body, hurrying to get home before it cooled down too much. There were several reasons why he had left so quickly, one of them surely being Kyuhyun’s sickness and the second one could be presumed, hopefully.

To be honest, Ryeowook had never seen Kyuhyun sick or weak, for that matter. It was a strange situation. No one would’ve ever thought Ryeowook would be the caretaker. After all with someone as responsible as Kyuhyun, how could the precious, ignorant “Wookie” be in charge of anything but being cute? But here he was, unlocking the door to a dorm room where a sickly Kyuhyun was recuperating.

“I’m back…are you feeling any better Kyu?” Ryeowook asked in a gentle voice, setting the still steaming bowl of soup on a table. For fear of the weak boy falling off his bunk, they had temporarily switched beds. Ryeowook found Kyuhyun half-awake with the covers pulled up to his chin. His dark eyes opened blearily, lips parting in a silent question. “Water?” Ryeowook filled in, watching the slight nod of Kyuhyun’s head.

The boy walked over to a case of water bottles, opening one and sitting down beside the drowsy boy. He held the bottle to Kyuhyun’s lips, slowly pouring water down the latter’s throat. A look of satisfaction passed over the sick boy’s face and he mumbled a word of thanks before falling limp in Ryeowook’s arms.

His heart skipped a beat looking at the vulnerable boy in his arms. Was it weird that Ryeowook felt almost happy seeing Kyuhyun so…human? An involuntary smile found its way on his face and he brushed the sweaty locks off of Kyuhyun’s face. “Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you,” he whispered sweetly, kissing the other boy’s forehead.

And that is precisely what Ryeowook did. He laid Kyuhyun down, pulled the covers back over him and went about wetting a cloth with cold water. Carefully squeezing out the excess, Ryeowook placed the towel over Kyuhyun’s feverish forehead, watching for any change in the contorted expression. Once he saw the face muscles relax, he went about filling a tub with cold water, bringing it back into the room along with another hand towel. Ryeowook rolled up his long sleeves and climbed onto the bed, hovering over the slumbering boy. “Hey Kyu,” he murmured, carefully undoing the buttons of Kyuhyun’s clothing, “I’m just going to wipe down your body okay? So don’t freak out.”

Kyuhyun nodded subtly, eyes still closed.

Ryeowook pushed the pajama shirt off his shoulder and took the hand towel floating in the tub of cold water. Squeezing out the extra water, Ryeowook folded the thin cloth into a fluffy square and ran it over Kyuhyun’s burning torso. A soft moan slipped from Kyuhyun’s lips and he breathed out sweetly.

“You have to turn over Kyu,” Ryeowook said, stifling his laughs.

A wrinkle formed between his brows and Kyuhyun’s eyes slowly opened. “Mmm…too much work Wookie…do I have to?” his flushed face just added to the helpless effect.

Wow, Ryeowook had never imagined thinking of Kyuhyun as weak. This was too cool! “I’m sorry Kyu, here I’ll help you,” and then he rolled the boy over, pulling the rest of his shirt off. Ryeowook steadfastly wiped away the sweat and then grabbed a new night shirt to clothe Kyuhyun with. The other one was moist with sweat unfortunately.

“Thank you,” Kyuhyun mumbled, stretching his neck, eyes squeezing for a second. Ryeowook nodded, knowing the other couldn’t see but he just felt like doing it. He had been making far too much noise around Kyuhyun anyway.

Glancing at the soup bowl, Ryeowook sighed quietly. It was a waste to hurry over huh? Kyuhyun probably wouldn’t even be eating until tomorrow morning or late that night. Ryeowook changed the towel on the other’s forehead before leaving him alone. _Kyu can be so cute…_

There was nothing left to do now. Kyuhyun needed his medicine in about an hour and probably a change of clothes again considering how warm he still was. _I guess I could take a quick shower…_ He grabbed some clothes and slippers from a dresser, along with all his toiletries. Just as Ryeowook prepared to go to the dorm’s shower stalls, a loud ringing broke the peaceful silence of the room.

He jumped, scrambling to turn off the noise. It was Kyuhyun’s phone. Ryeowook snatched it up, eyes wildly running over the locked touch screen. How did you turn it off? The green button gave under his unskilled fingers and then the ringing stopped, only to be replaced by the sound of someone…crying?

Ryeowook frowned, hurrying out into the hallway and answering the phone. “Why are you crying?” he asked in a low voice, scared of waking Kyuhyun up.

“Your cold makes you sound strange…,” The crying person mumbled, breaking out in sobs again, “If you were so sick why didn’t you tell me…?”

“Sorry…?” Ryeowook replied nervously. Comforting upset people in person was far easier than over the phone because well, how were you supposed to give a sweet old hug through a contraption like that?

“No…No…I’m sorry Kyu, I really want to have sex with you, _I do_!” Ryeowook nearly dropped the phone at that. His eyes were wide, jaw dropping. Who was this person? But they weren’t done sobbing and begging or whatever it was that they were doing. “I just…I feel so guilty. Please understand and don’t hate me…I don’t want to feel pain anymore and whenever I’m with you I’m so happy! So…So don’t leave me…no matter what okay? I…I think I’m in love you. I don’t want to be your boyfriend anymore…I want to be your lover.”

This was too much to handle. Ryeowook steadied himself against a wall. Kyuhyun…Kyuhyun was dating someone? And they were already talking about sex? Why was his so-called boyfriend so hysterical? What exactly happened? Ryeowook touched his chest, wincing at the tightening.

“Are you still there Kyu…?” the boyfriend whispered, sniffling.

“U-Uh…what did you do?” Ryeowook mumbled, unsure why he was so curious. Why couldn’t he just hang up and then everything would be already. He would pretend he never heard the conversation and—

“I…I…I’m not a virgin…”

Ryeowook felt like his knees were going to give out. This time he didn’t hesitate to end the call. Once he did, he turned off the phone, stuck it in his back pocket and walked off to the showers. This was too much information. He wasn’t even a part of it…right? It wasn’t his business who Kyuhyun dated…or maybe it was…Ryeowook sighed, disrobing and turning on the hot water of a stall. It poured down, eating away at the intense aching.


	26. Special: Mir Extra

No one really knew what happened in KUG’s dance pit that night. And Mir wasn’t about to go telling everyone because wasn’t it too embarrassing to say? He was a guy for goodness sake, how could he lose to some effeminate? It wasn’t even like Mir went easy on him. Just…he was so weak…Mir, not the pretty boy.

 

Taemin blew air softly against Mir’s ear and the latter jumped, practically falling out of his chair at the dining table. He turned wide, scared eyes to Taemin, whispering. “What are you doing?”

The pretty boy chuckled quietly, leaning closer to Mir. “Why don’t we finish up?”

“N-No!” he exclaimed in a small voice, looking around to see if Sungmin was paying enough attention to help him. However the other boy was preoccupied with getting out of Minho’s clutches and failing quite miserably. Mir sighed, glancing at Taemin anxiously. “Haven’t you found someone else at this point?”

“It’s not about the body,” he replied, sliding his hand high up in Mir’s inner thigh, “It’s about that face of yours. So beautiful…” Taemin took Mir’s hand, grinning. “Come with me or else I’ll tell everyone here what happened at KUG.”

“You wouldn’t,” Mir hissed.

Taemin’s eyes grew large and innocent. “Oh…but I _would_ because I _love_ sharing stories like that. You know, the ones where normally cool guys are—”

“I’m going to the restroom!” Mir announced standing and walking off quickly. He could usually handle a bastard’s teasing but knowing that Taemin would probably follow him around…until the end of high school… Mir shuddered, pushing the door to the bathroom open and leaning over the sink.

After a few moments of silence, the door creaked open and then there was the sound of a lock clicking. Mir jolted, whirling around to see Taemin coming towards him. The latter just smiled and pushed the other boy against the countertop. “You’re so obedient. Didn’t you think of running away instead of actually coming here?”

Ah shit.

“Well it’s too late, let’s start where we left off,” Taemin tilted his head sweetly but then his hands were on Mir’s belt, undoing it.

“N-No, stop it,” the boy stammered, pushing at Taemin.

“You get so weak when other people pay attention to you,” Taemin remarked, nibbling his neck as his fingers played over Mir’s member. “Is it because you’re an orphan, because all of us are. Or maybe you had parents and they were just disgusting tubs of lard. I’m not sure, so tell me, Mir. Why is someone like you so easily taken advantage of by others?”

Mir covered his mouth, face growing red as his limbs gave out. The boy fell to the ground in a heap, pants tying him around knees. “I don’t have to tell you anything,” he muttered through the gaps of his fingers, glaring weakly at Taemin.

“That’s true,” the pretty boy stated, climbing over Mir and flicking his tongue over the exposed length. “So then what do you wanna talk about? I love talking about the night we met. That’s a favorite of mine. I’ve never seen someone get turned on so fast. Maybe you’re a really pure boy. But then again you’re getting blown in a bathroom so maybe you aren’t that innocent?” He chuckled, running his hands over Mir’s body as he continued teasing his erection. “Aw, you’re too cute Mir, let me hear your voice. Whenever Minho and I do stuff he’s always saying that to me. I finally get it now. It’s so hot hearing someone whimpering and moaning under you.”

“You do stuff with Minho?” Mir breathed, immediately shutting his mouth after realizing that he showed interest in the conversation.

Taemin hadn’t missed it though. A smirk cut his expression and he stopped toying with Mir’s member. He leaned against one of the boy’s bent knees, gazing intently into eyes. “Mmhmm…he really likes fuck buddies. I’m pretty sure he wants your little friend next or maybe both of them. He talked about it once but I can’t really remember anymore.”

“That’s not right…,” Mir mumbled, trying to even out his breathing and fix his pants.

“Not so fast!” Taemin pushed Mir’s hands down, taking the length fully in his mouth.

Mir screamed out, unable to cover his mouth now. His body was tingling and burning and he couldn’t quite make out what he was feeling. It all sort of felt nice…but at the same time it felt horribly uncomfortable. There were things happening to that part of his body that had never happened before and he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. “Stop,” he gasped, squirming under Taemin’s ministrations.

The boy ignored him, dragging the flat of his tongue across the full length, slurping and sucking up the sticky liquid seeping from the member. He relished in the sounds Mir was emitting, closing his eyes to better hear it all. After a few moments the member engorged and Mir’s body stiffened. The bathroom became completely quiet aside from the sounds of Taemin’s mouth around the length. A second or two passed and then hot liquid was streaming down his throat, which he devoured greedily.

Mir fell back against the tile floor, body shivering from the immense effects. His lips were quivering, eyes shaking. “What did you do…?” he whimpered, rolling a bit, hands still locked by Taemin. “It feels weird…”

He lapped up the remnants of their activity and then smiled down at Mir, releasing the boy’s hands finally. “It’s a blow job. It makes you feel good, not weird,” Taemin explained. “Do you wanna try?”

“Mm…no,” Mir mumbled, fixing his pants finally and shakily buckling his belt. He sat up, preparing to get to his feet and leave to stupid situation. How had he ended up doing more with the guy? It was supposed to be a horrible onetime thing but somehow he had gone further. Why?

“That’s not fair…” Mir looked up, still trying to find the strength in his legs. Taemin was standing over him, eyes hot and lustful. “I did that for you but you won’t help me? That’s not acceptable to leave a debt unpaid, Mir.” He had one hand around his hard length, using the other to lead Mir’s lips to it.

His mouth caught the member and when Mir tried to pull out, the hand at the back of his head pushed him forward, the head of Taemin’s length hitting the back of his throat. Mir winced, hands coming up to balance on the other boy’s thighs. It wasn’t the best feeling of having someone in your mouth; rather it was the strangely attractive moans that the service caused. Mir glanced up at Taemin, seeing the boy’s eyes half lidded and face flushed.

“Use your tongue more,” Taemin panted, grinding his hips in Mir’s face. Mir obliged without thinking, listening to the reaction he received. “Ah…ah, faster,” the boy ordered, shoving himself into the other’s mouth.

Mir gagged, tears brimming around his eyes. Suddenly the forceful thrusts froze and Taemin was groaning and holding Mir so the length stayed deep in his throat. Burning, thick liquid shot down, shocking the boy. He swallowed the first half, but the rest burst from his lips, a mess of white coating his abused mouth and chin.

“What is this?” Mir asked, wiping at the white liquid coating his face.

Taemin kneeled down, taking the other boy’s face and kissing him deeply, tongue running over and cleaning off the thick residue. Mir made a soft noise, jerking back from Taemin only to fall back to the floor with the latter still exploring the inside of his mouth.

There was a knock at the bathroom door.

Taemin slipped away, looking up in annoyance at the interruption. He stood up, quickly correcting his pants and helping Mir to his feet. “So unfair,” he remarked, rolling his eyes and wrapping his arms around the other boy’s waist. “I was almost positive I could get you to go all the way and then some loser had to show up.”

“W-What?” Mir covered his blushing face, eyes spinning as he tried to find something new to look at.

The knocking became more incessant.

Taemin unlocked the door, swinging it open. “Chill, it’s not like you’re gonna piss yourself,” he snapped, dragging Mir out of the bathroom after him.

Mir sighed. He really preferred studying.


	27. Chapter 27

Eunhyuk entered the second year dorms, climbing the staircase to the top floor and knocking on one of the many doors. It was a little past midnight. KUG had been closed for the week since Kangin decided to go on some lame camping trip with Teukie-hyung. Eunhyuk had rolled his eyes knowing that the KUG owner just wanted to keep his love away from the VP, Yunho. Otherwise he wouldn’t have shut down the club during the busiest time of the month.

The door opened. “Come in,” Zhoumi stated, stepping aside for the other boy. He shut the door, locking it and pushing Eunhyuk down onto the bed. “I need you…”

Eunhyuk nodded, reaching up and taking the other’s shirt off. He removed his pants next, stroking Zhoumi’s hard length. “What brought this on?” Eunhyuk inquired, taking one pert nipple into his mouth.

“Kyuhyun’s not sick anymore,” Zhoumi panted, grinding his hips into the hand relieving his member. “And we were kissing and then he reached down. I…you know,” he muttered, trailing off guiltily.

“Getting all hot and heavy from just that?” Eunhyuk scoffed, “You must really want him.”

“You don’t even know,” Zhoumi sighed, biting and sucking the blonde’s neck. “Every time he touches me I want to do it with him…”

Eunhyuk slid a finger inside of Zhoumi, still using his other hand to stroke him. “Top or bottom?” he murmured, licking the younger boy’s ear.

“Top,” he grunted, pushing back against the fingers invading him, “I don’t want you having to do all the work.”

Slowly, Eunhyuk removed himself from inside Zhoumi, unzipping his pants for the latter. The boy swallowed the erection, sucking and tonguing it. His body shuddered from the act, skin humming with heat and energy. The pressure from earlier had dissipated as they continued, Zhoumi’s need being met.

Once the member was slick with saliva, Zhoumi backed away, positioning his entrance over the head. He pushed down, groaning at the friction. Delicious shudders rolled through his body, all of the guilt shoved aside in the space of his consciousness. The only things that mattered in that moment were getting Eunhyuk deeper inside of him and fast.

He ground his hips into Eunhyuk’s pelvis, palms pressing harshly down on the partially exposed chest below him. The member buried inside Zhoumi hit that one spot and a low moan burst from lips. He moved faster, getting Eunhyuk to slam into him again and again.

“Fuck me harder,” Zhoumi gasped, stroking his own length as the pleasurable shudders continued to send spine-tingling sensations through him.

Eunhyuk gripped those slim hips harder, thrusting up off the bed to meet Zhoumi. His back arched up, lips parting as his groans fused with Zhoumi’s uncontrolled screams. They released seconds’ apart, swimming in the foggy aftermath. “Shit…,” Eunhyuk panted, the last spurts of semen attacking Zhoumi’s insides.

The younger boy wasn’t done though. He ran the flat of his tongue over Eunhyuk’s abs, cleaning up the remnants of his release. “I want more of you,” Zhoumi said in a low, seductive tone, body tightening around the semi-erect member still buried in him.

Eunhyuk sharply gasped, gazing down at the boy. “Why are you so horny?”

“I told you already…,” Zhoumi replied.

“Well what else is there?” Eunhyuk demanded, “Because I’m sure as hell not used to doing it with you more than once in a sitting.”

Zhoumi clicked his tongue, shooting the blonde an annoyed look. “Well I’m feeling a little less guilty…that’s all. I still hate this,” he assured, eyes saddening, “I hate all of these hormones and my decisions, but I told Kyu that I’m not a virgin.”

“You what?” Eunhyuk sat up a bit, only to groan at the pressure hardening his erection and fall back against the sheets.

“Yeah, I told him over the phone and at first he ended the call and I thought he was upset,” Zhoumi explained, swirling his tongue around one of the older boy’s nipples. “Then when I saw him in person he didn’t seem to even be bothered by it, didn’t bring it up or anything… I guess that means he’s not mad at me.”

“And so you’re feeling like it’s not all that bad to be fucking someone because you want their body?” Eunhyuk muttered, mouth a flat line.

“…shut up,” he whispered, voice hurt. And yet he couldn’t stop himself. He wanted to devour the person beneath him. He wanted all of it, all the time, unless of course Kyuhyun was around. At those times he just wanted to have Kyuhyun under him or over him or somehow connected to him without clothing barriers.

Eunhyuk sighed, gently patting the other’s head. “You’re not a bad kid, Mi.”

Zhoumi suppressed the tears daring to spill down his face and he nodded subtly. “Just do it already. I don’t want to talk anymore.”

“Sure.”


	28. Chapter 28

Ryeowook was starting to notice the little things. As he observed presently, he couldn’t imagine how he had been so blind. All the signs were there. The way Kyuhyun would smirk at his phone when he received a text and immediately reply. That was out of character. He never answered messages quickly. But that wasn’t the only thing. Kyuhyun was having “sleepovers” more often than not, leaving Ryeowook to hang around the room alone. Whenever Kyuhyun got a call he would leave the room. Before he didn’t have anyone more important than Ryeowook and therefore so no reason to dismiss himself in order to speak to someone.

All of this, of course, wasn’t that new. Ryeowook just hadn’t seen it happening.

But now that he was…well, he wasn’t sure what to think. Kyuhyun definitely had a boyfriend that wasn’t Ryeowook. Not that the boy ever thought he would be Kyuhyun’s boyfriend…or maybe he did. It was all too confusing. He loved Kyuhyun. But what sort of love was it? Did he want to hold hands with the other boy and kiss the other boy? Well, he already did all of that. So how was he supposed to react to knowing that his longest, oldest friend had moved on without a word? In fact, Ryeowook had to wonder, why had Kyuhyun worked so hard to keep it a secret? Did Ryeowook knowing the truth have to be such a bad thing?

“Hey, you solved this wrong.”

Ryeowook’s head shot up, almost ramming into Kyuhyun who swiftly backed up to avoid the accidental collision. “Oh, sorry Kyu,” he apologized, sighing and turning around to look up at the slightly irritated boy.

“What are you so hyped up about?” Kyuhyun questioned, arms crossed and eyebrows raised.

“N-Nothing,” he stuttered, turning back to fix the problem Kyuhyun had pointed out.

A cold hand pressed against Ryeowook’s jaw, turning his head up to face his annoyed roommate. “You’re keeping secrets from me again. It’s because you’re around that Stupid Bunny all the time. You’ve picked up some bad habits.”

“That’s not it!” Ryeowook argued, silencing himself and flushing. He had never raised his voice against Kyuhyun before.

He wasn’t the only one who was shocked though. Kyuhyun frowned at the behavior. “Whatever,” he shrugged, “I’m sleeping over at a friend’s tonight. We have a Math Team competition tomorrow morning.”

Ryeowook bit back the words he wanted to say and nodded at the announcement. The other boy who had been expecting some sort of whiny outburst didn’t receive it. He stood there silently for a few moments, expecting a delayed reaction perhaps, but that too did not come. Kyuhyun felt like yelling at that Stupid Bunny. Why was he influencing Ryeowook so much? The only person that should’ve been teaching the useless boy anything was Kyuhyun. Everyone else would just mess Ryeowook up. And surprise, here the boy was, defying his closest friend so openly.

“Don’t forget to take your medicine and don’t kick your blankets off in the middle of the night,” Kyuhyun reminded, opening the door and crossing the threshold slowly, “Ryeowook are you listening to me?”

“Yeah,” Ryeowook replied in a sharper voice than he had planned.

“…If I find out that you’ve collapsed again, you’re under house arrest,” Kyuhyun added, shutting the door behind him.

Ryeowook nodded to the air, still staring at the problem laid out before him. What was he looking at anyway? Shaking his head, Ryeowook stood up and took a deep breath. His face felt cold and warm and wet. Wet? Tear drops splashed onto his upraised hand. “Why…?” he whispered, wiping at the salty liquid. It wouldn’t slow though. The reaction was involuntary and so was the stinging in his chest. “I…” He took two pills from the heart medication bottle, swallowing them quickly. The pain lessened but it wouldn’t go away.

Panicked, Ryeowook shuffled out of the room, finding Sungmin’s door and knocking rapidly. His heart was beating faster and the pain was intensifying. If this was an attack then the medication should’ve stopped it. So why wasn’t it stopping? Why were the tears spilling and the clenching so demanding?

The door clicked open and Ryeowook curled his hand around Sungmin’s sleeve, other hand tightly holding the place over his burning chest. “Minnie…it hurts,” he croaked, squeezing his eyes shut in hopes of making the tears slow.

Sungmin pulled the other boy into the room worriedly, hugging him gently. “Where’s your medicine? Do you need me to call the doctor?”

“I took the medicine…that’s why I don’t understand why it hurts,” Ryeowook explained through hiccups and sobs. “But there’s so much pain…I don’t know what to do, Minnie…!”

“What happened before all of this?” Sungmin asked softly, stroking Ryeowook’s soft hair and sitting him down on his bed.

“Kyuhyun went to sleepover at his boyfriend’s room,” Ryeowook whispered, and suddenly he was lurching forward, gripping Sungmin with both hands and wailing loudly. “I don’t know why but it hurts every time I think about it..! If Kyu’s happy why am I not? I don’t want him to be sad…Minnie what’s wrong with me?” He looked up at his friend and saw tears running down the dark haired boy’s face as well.

Ryeowook’s eyes widened and he caressed the other’s face with hands. “Why are you crying Minnie…? Does something hurt in you too…?”

Sungmin nodded, lips quivering. “You’re making me sad…,” he whispered, hiccupping and holding Ryeowook close to him.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled, still gazing into those melancholy black eyes. Ryeowook’s eyes shifted down to the pale pink lips shaking before him and a new question appeared among the mess of his brain. “Why did you kiss me so long ago?” he blurted.

Sungmin’s eyes saddened even more. “Because you’re my most precious friend…and I want you to see that Kyuhyun won’t make you happy. He’s only—,” Sungmin cut himself off.

Ryeowook leaned forward, pressing his lips against Sungmin’s gently. “…Then you’re my precious friend too…and I don’t want you to be sad…” He raised his eyes back up to meet Sungmin’s seeing the tears slowing and drying on that gently sloping face.  

They simply gazed at one another, each passing silent words but then carefully, slowly they felt their bodies adapting to the small space separating them. Ryeowook’s hands slipped down from the other boy’s face to rest on his shoulders. Sungmin fully enveloped the other with his arms, head tilting slightly as Ryeowook’s shifted the other way. And then their lips were meeting, softly, fleetingly.

Ryeowook felt his eyes close, as his lips moved in a secret rhythm against Sungmin’s. There was nothing heated about their touches, just the soft comfort of companionship. At the same time, it was nothing like Ryeowook had ever experienced before. It wasn’t like the forceful way Kyuhyun kissed, nor was it like the sloppy, wet contact of Minho.

Sungmin lightly tugged on Ryeowook’s lower lip with his teeth, eyes carefully opening to look at the latter. He reached his hands up, pushing the hair back from Ryeowook’s face. Their lips pressed harder against one another, both of their tears coming to a halt.

 


	29. Chapter 29

Mir stared at his two friends (?), confused as to why they looked like that. Normally they were more…bubbly. He finished his drink, tossing it in a trashcan. The noise apparently startled both of them and they looked up from their lunches first at Mir and then at each other and then back down at their food. “I never thought I would be starting a conversation with you two,” he sighed, “but what are you guys doing for Christmas this year?”

“I’m not sure,” Ryeowook replied, smiling up at Mir but avoiding looking at Sungmin.

“Probably nothing,” Sungmin mumbled, popping a piece of candy cane into his mouth and sucking on the minty hard candy.

Ryeowook whipped around, wide eyes locked on Sungmin. The latter blushed a bright red color and shoved the staring boy’s face in the opposite direction. “D-Don’t look at me, dummy!” he stammered.

“S-S-Sorry,” Ryeowook stuttered his face coloring as he turned eyes away.

Mir leaned back in the chair, arms crossing over chest. “Okay, what the hell happened?”

“Nothing!” They both answered, glancing at one another before looking away with heated blushed again.

Mir felt his mouth twitching in annoyance. Why were they lying so badly? And what were they blushing so crazily for? It never would’ve pissed Mir off in the past but after all that crap they made him go through they were going to exclude him _now_? Just what was so bad that they couldn’t even look at each other? Mir pulled out his phone, flicking to the Bookmarks tab of his internet connection.

There was a link titled “Friends and How to Deal with Them”. He clicked on it, scrolling over the tips to effective communication. Call him a nerd, but that was what he was, an anti-social nerd that needed help understanding how to socialize properly.

 

**Tip #4:**

**If you want to be trusted then first you have to show them that they are trusted.**

**Example: Let’s say your friend won’t tell you a secret. So you tell them a secret so they will trust you with theirs.**

**Scenario: Person A says “I don’t think I can tell you…”**

**Person B replies “Once, I fell off my bike and my pants tore in front of everyone”**

**Person A says “Wow! I didn’t know you trusted me so much. Okay, my friend      and I accidentally set the fire alarm off and made everyone go outside last Tuesday.”**

Mir put the phone away after rereading the tip a couple of times. That was easy enough right? He just had to think of something embarrassing and then they would fess up about what happened. A red color tinted his cheeks and Mir fizzed out. Okay that was a little too embarrassing wasn’t it? “How bad is it?” he sighed, looking at Ryeowook and then Sungmin.

“Big,” Ryeowook answered quietly.

“Bad,” Sungmin muttered, eyes cast down.

Mir took a long, slow, deep breath. High school was about experimenting right? Maybe…Maybe everything would be alright. No. Hell shit. He was so going to regret telling. “…,” his mouth was open but the words weren’t coming out. Sungmin cocked an eyebrow, giving him a weird look. Mir cleared his throat and started again, this time by typing out a text and sending it to both of them.

Ryeowook and Sungmin finished reading at about the same time and immediately reached across the table to grab Mir by the collar. They dragged him in close, their jaws dropped. “You hooked up with that Taemin guy?” Ryeowook whispered sharply.

“In a bathroom?” Sungmin added.                                                                                                    

Mir shook them both off. “Shut up already!” he snapped, subduing the two astounded boys. “He...whatever! Just tell me what happened between you two now! I trusted you with something huge so tell me why you guys are acting so weird!”

Sungmin stifled a laugh. “Ours is bad…but it’s not as bad as _yours_.”

“Yeah Mir…maybe you should’ve picked something less…bad to tell us,” Ryeowook chimed in, suppressing his own giggles.

He just couldn’t win with these two could he? Mir sighed, dropping his head to the table top and grinding out “Tell me already.”

“We kissed.”

Mir’s head shot up, jaw slackening. The pair was blushing again but now they were able to look at each other, as if confessing had lessened the burden. “You _kissed?_ ” Mir repeated.

“Twice…,” Ryeowook mumbled, “once on the Cat Walk during the _Phantom of the Opera_ performance and then again last night in Sungmin’s room…”

“Why did you tell him that?” Sungmin barked, turning on Ryeowook.

“Because I felt bad for hearing something so embarrassing from him!” he argued, shrugging helplessly and then apologetically nodding at Mir.

The boy waved off the remark, continuing to gape at Ryeowook and Sungmin. He had always had a hunch they were doing stuff together…but to hear it straight out was a whole different thing. They weren’t dating if just a kiss was making them uncomfortable. It had to mean there was something else…but what? “Why did you kiss?”

“Not very good with subtlety I see,” Sungmin remarked bitterly, “and I don’t know…” His eyes trailed over to Ryeowook who was giving him the same vulnerable, secretive look. “We’re…confused I think. Or maybe it’s just because we’re…,” he blushed, ending the thought like that.

There was a beeping noise. Ryeowook jumped, looking down at his phone. A message icon blared on the screen so he opened it, finding a video attachment and text message from Henry. “I’ll be right back,” Ryeowook said, standing up and downloading the video as he stepped into a quiet hallway.

The video loaded and he saw the sweet, baby face of Henry. “Wookie-hyung!” he exclaimed, waving and stepping back from the video camera. A piano appeared in the shot and then music began.

It was a song that Ryeowook had never heard before but at the same time…it felt so familiar. There was something about it that made him want to cry and laugh and shout at the same time. In a soft voice, Henry began singing though. It was somewhat muffled by the static but Ryeowook would recognize those words anywhere.

 

_“Take a deep breath,_

_Don’t dream of death,_

_Listen to my hushed voice,_

_As I offer you the choice,_

_Open and grassy,_

_Bright and blue,_

_Follow a white stream,_

_And you’ll see a dream,_

_Now open your eyes,_

_See the endless skies,_

_Purity and nothingness,_

_You and me,_

_Peer up at the stars,_

_For this world is ours…”_

The video ended and Ryeowook quickly scrolled over to read the attached message. It read:

**I was working on a new piece when I came across a copy of the poem! Well, do you remember what I said was wrong with it? That the author didn’t understand what he was feeling? Well I thought and thought and thought…and realized maybe that’s the point. Maybe he’s expressing the feelings that he might feel or want to feel or thinks he feels. It’s a mess of musical joy and sorrow and frustration. Sort of crazy trying to compose a song…but I think it turned out good. Tell me if it fits okay :D I hope it does…if not I’ll keep working on it with you when I get back Wookie-hyung!**

**Lots of Love,**

**Henry**

Ryeowook smiled at the message, opening a reply.

**It’s perfect Henry…and thanks…I think I understand him a little bit better now. Maybe not everything but a good bit of his character has revealed itself. Let’s work on the second and third poems when you get back for sure!**

**With all my heart,**

**Wookie-hyung**


	30. Chapter 30

Kyuhyun led Zhoumi into his room, kissing the older boy happily. People did say that December was the season of love…maybe. Well he didn’t know. It should’ve been right? After all, this was the time for beautiful love affairs, late night getaways, quiet meaningful walks through the snow, and gift exchanges so magical you would think it false.

“What do you want for Christmas?” Kyuhyun asked, as they sat at his desk, Zhoumi on the wooden writing area and Kyuhyun on the chair. The latter kept his hands on the slim boy’s waist, gazing kindly up at him.

“How will you get it on campus?” Zhoumi laughed softly.

“We can ask Kangin to get it for us or maybe Eunhyuk,” Kyuhyun answered, smirking. “They always sneak off campus don’t they?”

Something flitted over Zhoumi’s face but then he was patting his boyfriend’s shoulder, rolling his eyes teasingly. “You should call your elders hyung, Kyu.”

“Do you want me to call you hyung then?” he prompted, taking both of Zhoumi’s hands and brushing his lips over them. “Hmm…Mi-hyung…that sounds funny.”

“Should I be insulted?” Zhoumi couldn’t stop himself from smiling, bending forward and meeting Kyuhyun’s expectant lips. The younger boy pulled him into his lap, arms enveloping him protectively, tenderly. Zhoumi opened his mouth for Kyuhyun, feeling that gentle tongue enter and dance with his own.

***

“Do you think it was a bad idea to tell Mir?” Ryeowook voiced his thoughts as he and Sungmin strode back to the dorm building. They stayed close to one another, pushing through the chilly winter air.

Snow had refused to fall and everyone was beginning to worry. It was already the second week of December and not a speck of white had touched the land. Ryeowook really loved snow and so did many others. For many of them, the holiday season had either been filled with terrible memories or irreplaceable ones.

In Ryeowook’s case, he could only remember the good times because so long as Kyuhyun had been around, a bad Christmas didn’t exist. When they were together, something magical formed; something that just fills the entire lonely atmosphere with a light just for them. Perhaps that was why Ryeowook held the other in such high esteem. He couldn’t disagree when others complained about Kyuhyun’s attitude problem and yet, he couldn’t help but argue when someone claimed the boy was cold. Kyuhyun had been the only one to ever care for Ryeowook and until recently, the latter hadn’t realized there were others who cared just as much.

 _Boyfriend…_ Ryeowook shook his head. It wasn’t right to be against Kyuhyun having a boyfriend. If having a boyfriend was a bad thing…well it wasn’t. Ryeowook understood the need for love in everyone’s lives. It was the nature of people to seek companionship and excitement and physical/emotional/spiritual fulfillment. That’s why he was frustrated with himself. He was so frustrated at the fact that the mere thought of Kyuhyun valuing someone above him sent daggers of pain through his chest. How much worse could Ryeowook get?

“Mir’s not going to tell anyone,” Sungmin stated, picking up the pace of his walk, taking Ryeowook’s hand in the process. “He’s not like that. You saw how hard it was for him to confess that Taemin thing, which, by the way, was totally crazy!”

“I can’t believe that he did it,” Ryeowook breathed, watching his breath become like a heated dragon’s in the cold air. He broke into a grin, running up to be directly beside Sungmin. “Look, look, Dragon’s Breath!” Ryeowook huffed and a big puff of white air burst out in front of him. “Did you ever do that when you were little?”

Sungmin’s eyes smiled, the lower half of his face hidden behind a scarf, “I forgot what we called it but yeah we used to have contests and stuff! It was so awesome! I always won though.”

“Really?” Ryeowook’s eyes became large and he hugged the other boy’s arm for warmth. “I would win when Kyuhyun wasn’t around but when he was…well,” the boy shrugged sheepishly, laughing and bumping Sungmin playfully. “Hey, hey you told Mir that you’re not doing anything for Christmas right?”

“Mmhmm,” Sungmin affirmed, opening the door to the dorm building. They hurried inside, sighing as the heater’s warm air rolled over them. “Why? Did you wanna do something?” He unwrapped the scarf from his neck, unzipping his jacket.

Ryeowook tugged his mittens off, stuffing them in his jacket pocket. “I’ve always wanted to have a Christmas party but there were never enough kids to invite. So I was thinking we should throw one this year. What do you think, Minnie?”

“What about the Hound?” Sungmin snorted, ascending the steps to their floor.

Ryeowook squeezed the other’s hand, smiling half heartedly when Sungmin met his eyes. “Lovers like to be with each other on Christmas right? I’m sure he’ll want to be with his boyfriend this year…”

Silently, Sungmin ruffled the boy’s hair, tightening the hands that held one another. “Then let’s invite everyone okay? We’ll see if all the Tech Crew people want to do something, we’ll even see if Yesung-hyung wants to join.”

“R-Really?” Ryeowook piped up, eyes suddenly shining.

“You’re such a fan boy!” Sungmin laughed, hugging the other boy teasingly.

***

“Kyu…we should stop…,” Zhoumi murmured, pushing the other boy back gently. He still rested in the younger one’s lap, trying to avoid the hands pressuring him. “I don’t want to go this fast with you…”

Kyuhyun reluctantly removed his roaming hands, gazing pleadingly up at the second year. “Is there something wrong with me? Is that why you’re so against moving forward? I want to have sex with you,” he urged, holding the sides of Zhoumi’s angular face. He pulled the older boy close to his own face, kissing him gently. “Why won’t you let us take the next step…?”

“It’s not like that, Kyu!” Zhoumi insisted, holding the backs of Kyuhyun’s hands. “I…I just can’t yet. I can’t do that to you. You understand, don’t you…?”

“Yeah…I get it,” Kyuhyun said reluctantly, pressing his lips against Zhoumi’s again. His arms wrapped around the slender man’s neck and he deepened the kiss. The second year encircled Kyuhyun’s waist with his long arms.

This was okay. There was no guilt here. Zhoumi could freely kiss this wonderful boy without the slightest bit of worry. So long as they never ventured past here then surely…surely their relationship would continue to stay the same. He didn’t want anything to change. He wanted time to stop right then and there. All of the mistakes made would be just a distance memory, left to age while Kyuhyun and Zhoumi were trapped in a timeless bubble where no one could invade. There would only be them, holding each other tenderly…

 


	31. Chapter 31

“Operation: Sneak off Campus to Christmas Shop!” Sungmin announced, punching his fist into the air excitedly. Ryeowook followed his example, jumping up cutely and cheering. Mir pumped his fist once, looking away from the display of excitement. A smile touched his lips nonetheless. It was good to have them getting back to normal, or at least distracted.

“So how will we do it?” Ryeowook inquired expectantly.

Sungmin turned to Mir. “So how will we do it?”

Mir backed up, eyeing them weirdly. “What are you looking at me for? I didn’t come out with that plan.” He furthermore crossed his arms, flinging the hair out of his face with a quick jerk of his head. “And why are you all in my room? Didn’t we use Sungmin’s for the KUG mission?”

“And did that mission go over well?” Sungmin prompted.

When Mir didn’t answer, Ryeowook did, saying, “No! That’s why we’ve switched locations in hopes of getting a better result!”

“Why is he so hyper?” Mir sighed, taking a sip of the dark hot chocolate.

“You gave him sweets,” Sungmin shrugged, quickly moving on to a new topic. “C’mon Mir, you’ve gotta know a way off campus! You’re friends with a bunch of upperclassmen aren’t you? Haven’t any of them every left school grounds?”

Mir shook his head. “Just because they wear black doesn’t mean they’re ninjas,” he muttered, slightly offended by the assumption.

“Well we’ll have to go find someone who can help us then right?” Sungmin nodded firmly. “Why don’t we go ask Yesung-hyung? Maybe he’ll know something.”

Mir cleared his throat. “You’re forgetting that he’s on StudGov. We’ll be in serious trouble if he finds out that we sneaked off campus.”

“What about Kangin?”

“I heard that he’s busy with preparations for a KUG Christmas event.”

“What about…uhm…”

Mir stood up, stretching and yawning. “I’m gonna go to the library. If you guys still wanna stay here then I’m gonna be back in like ten minutes.” He pulled on a sweater, walking to the door and opening it. “…A Christmas party…would be fun though,” Mir mumbled rapidly, blushing and rushing out of the room.

Sungmin and Ryeowook exchanged smiles, laughing and sipping their hot chocolates.

***

An hour and a half passed and Mir still hadn’t returned. Ryeowook sat up from his short nap on the soft bed, rubbing his eyes and looking at the boy who had fallen asleep next to him. He shook Sungmin’s shoulder, trying to wake him up.

When the other boy wasn’t getting up, Ryeowook pouted and slumped on top of him, sighing softly as his eyes closed again. “Where’s Mir?” he muttered.

Sungmin made an annoyed sound. “Hmm? Who? …Oh, Mir,” he grunted, opening his eyes grudgingly. Sure enough the room was empty except for him and Ryeowook. “The nerd probably stayed around to study. We should leave,” Sungmin sighed, helping the other boy off of him.

“It’s so nice in here though,” Ryeowook mumbled, snuggling against Sungmin, head resting in his lap. “I don’t know why but it’s really warm and friendly in Mir’s room.”

“We can’t stay though,” Sungmin pointed out, making Ryeowook sit up properly and put on his sweater. “We haven’t even gone back to our rooms today.”

“Mm…I guess that’s true,” Ryeowook frowned, stumbling to his feet and pulling on shoes.

It took a few more minutes for them to collect themselves well enough to leave. Once they were ready, the pair left the room, securing closing the door behind them. They lived one floor higher than Mir, and their rooms were down the hall from each other, not too far of a walk.

Ryeowook turned the corner with Sungmin, the two of them about to enter the hallway to their dorm rooms when abruptly someone was grabbed both of their jackets and dragging them backwards. Ryeowook squeaked scrabbling to get away and failing.

“What the—,” Sungmin flew past an open door, watching it shut, trapping both of them in a room. He swiveled around, keeping Ryeowook close to him. But then his eyes caught sight of the culprit. Of course it was him. Who else could it be, really? “What do you want, Minho?” he spat, glaring at the smiling first year.

“Mir!” Ryeowook gasped, pointing and pulling on Sungmin’s sleeve.

The latter looked over, seeing a squirmy Mir tied to a chair. Taemin was perched on the awkward boy’s lap, perfectly content. The pretty child waved at Sungmin and Ryeowook, saying “Hi~! Glad you could join us!”

“How did you know we were coming?” Sungmin demanded.

Minho threw his arms around Sungmin and Ryeowook’s shoulders, forcing the two boys apart. “Really, it’s like you don’t realize how much power I have.” He pushed them down on one of the beds, snapping his fingers. From somewhere – Sungmin and Ryeowook would never know – came two of Minho and Taemin’s friends who quickly locked the two boys in firm grips.

“This is kidnapping!” Ryeowook exclaimed, looking around wildly.

“Oh please,” Minho scoffed, “I’ll release you guys. Don’t worry so much…although I do like the sight of you two pinned to my bed. Pretty hot if you ask me.”

“Just say what you gotta say!” Sungmin snapped, stopping his useless fighting with his captors.

Minho sat down on the opposing bed, smirking. “Well I heard from a little birdie that you’re looking for a way off campus.”

“Mir!”                                                      

“It was Taemin’s fault!” Mir exclaimed, effectively shutting up when the boy in his lap shot him a seductive look.

“Anyway,” Minho stated, “we’re willing to help you.”

“Why? What’s your price?” Sungmin said immediately, eyes narrowing.

“Spend Christmas with us,” he replied, catching the hostile boy off guard. Minho snickered, “Were you expecting something else? It’s just that the four of us want to have a party and sweet Mir told us that you guys were hosting one. We wouldn’t mind having more people to spend Christmas with is all.”

“Oh, that’s okay isn’t Minnie?” Ryeowook blinked, turning smiling eyes to his friend. “I’d love to have more people around too. Even them…they’re okay I guess…”

“…what if they try something again?” Sungmin argued.

“We won’t,” Minho rolled his eyes, a devilish grin on his face, “well, speaking for myself I might try something but don’t worry. You can always fight me off right Sungminnie?”

“…Touch me or Ryeowook and I’ll castrate you.”

“It’s a deal then!”

 


	32. Chapter 32

Ryeowook glanced at Kyuhyun anxiously. The latter looked up from his book, eyeing the nervous boy weirdly. “What’s up?” he asked, twisting around slightly in the chair. “You keep looking at me.”

“Well I was wondering what you want for Christmas…”

“Oh,” Kyuhyun mumbled, eyes fluttering in surprise. How had he forgotten about present exchanges with Ryeowook? They always gave each other presents. It was tradition. Kyuhyun draped his arms over the back of the chair, tilting his head slightly as he studied the other boy. “What about you? What do you want, Wookie?”

The boy shook his head. “No, no, I was asking about you, Kyu! What do you want this year? Is there anything in particular you’ve been wanting?”

 _Zhoumi…_ Kyuhyun shook his head, clearing his mind of the thought. Right, he said he would wait. There was no reason to pressure him. It would only make the moment less magical. He wanted their first time to be absolutely great, none of that “almost perfect” crap. It would be the best moment in his sixteen years of life. “I don’t have anything I want,” Kyuhyun replied.

“Oh…,” Ryeowook’s brow furrowed, “Are you sure? I mean, we haven’t spoken much lately and I’m really at a loss about what you like these days…”

Perhaps it was because Zhoumi had softened his thoughts because Kyuhyun – for the first time in a long time – didn’t have the urge to scream at Ryeowook for being so meek. He simply shrugged at his roommate and turned back around in the seat. “I haven’t changed that much, Wookie. Just get whatever you want and I’ll do the same.”

“Alright,” the boy replied softly. “Hey, Kyu?”

“Hmm?” Kyuhyun murmured, no longer focusing on the words on paper but on presents and Zhoumi and everything but schoolwork. Before Ryeowook could say anything though, a chilling thought struck Kyuhyun. What if the next words out of the boy’s mouth were about plans for Christmas? How would he explain that they weren’t going to spend Christmas together? The kid would be heartbroken right? Kyuhyun quickly turned around in his seat, cutting Ryeowook off before he could even start, “I figured that this year I would just stay here and study. Since I missed so much of Math Team, I really need to catch up. If you want to hang out with other people, that would be best, okay Wookie?”

Ryeowook blinked several times and then smiled uncertainly. “A-Ah…okay. Well can I say what I wanted to say now…?”

Kyuhyun nodded slowly.

“I’m sleeping over at a friend’s tonight.”

Annoyance rippled through Kyuhyun’s heart. He knew that excuse. It was the same phrase he had been using for the past few months. But why was Ryeowook using it? There had better be an explanation aside from the translation which was, quite frankly, “I’m sleeping over at my boyfriend’s”.

Kyuhyun’s eyes narrowed and he stood up, towering over Ryeowook. “Why?”

“U-Uhm, for fun…?” Ryeowook said, backing up a bit.

“What sort of fun?” the other boy leaned forward, placing hands on either side of Ryeowook. His knee slid between the nervous, seated boy’s legs. At this point, Ryeowook found himself back on his elbows, abdomen hurting a bit from the muscles needed to hold him up.

“We were just going to stay up late and eat and watch movies on his laptop,” Ryeowook said rapidly, sounding like he was reciting a script. “K-Kyu…you’re kind of close…”

Kyuhyun pressed even closer, face practically brushing Ryeowook’s. “You’re lying to me. You promised you wouldn’t do that anymore. Why can’t you keep your promises to me anymore, huh Wookie?” He pinned the slender boy to the bed, hands on either side of his head.

“I’m not l-lying…,” Ryeowook swallowed hard.

“See? You’re lying about lying,” Kyuhyun grunted, “You’re so bad at it. What are you trying to hide so desperately? Is it about that Stupid Bunny? Has he got you running around doing stuff with him?”

Ryeowook blushed, eyes flashing with hurt. “Minnie isn’t like that! I like spending time with him. We have so much fun together—”

Lips covered Ryeowook’s mouth. Kyuhyun snatched the laying boy’s chin, jerking his mouth open. It pissed him off. Every time that Stupid Bunny’s name left Ryeowook’s lungs, he wanted to shut the boy up. He shouldn’t have been defying Kyuhyun in general, but there was almost never a time where he _didn’t_ defend Sungmin anymore. Some loud mouth couldn’t just step in and turn Ryeowook against Kyuhyun. That wasn’t allowed.

Ryeowook…Ryeowook was Kyuhyun’s and no one else’s. That’s why it was wrong. Their friendship was like the plague. All it left were hurt people and hate. It was better to have Ryeowook stay away from something like that, something that could destroy Kyuhyun’s bond. Sungmin was an ugly extra. There was no room for him in Kyuhyun and Ryeowook’s world. There was no room for anyone but them.

And then the strangest, most shattering thing happened.

Kyuhyun felt himself shoved off with the accompanied words, “You have a boyfriend!” And their world’s protective shields came crashing down.

Ryeowook’s eyes were red and wet, his hand covering mouth. “Don’t kiss me….” He stood up, grabbing his jacket and stumbling to the door, head lowered. “…just don’t do that anymore,” he whispered, unlocking the door, “I don’t want it.”

***

Kyuhyun touched his lips. What just happened? Who just pushed him? There was something cruel gnawing at his chest. He looked down at it. Why did it have to make a ruckus now? More importantly, how had Ryeowook found out about Zhoumi? The kid wasn’t smart enough to figure it out on his own right? There was no way; no way had Ryeowook picked up on anything. So who told him? Who messed up their carefully constructed world? Who dared step into their world? No one was supposed to get to them, to Ryeowook.

He jerked the door open, running out and looking around. No one was there though. Ryeowook had disappeared. Kyuhyun stepped further into the hallway, taking slow steps. Wait…why was he so bent on finding Ryeowook? This was a blessing…in a sense. Kyuhyun hadn’t wanted his relationship with Zhoumi to be found out, but wasn’t it better this way? No. It wasn’t. Ryeowook was clean. He wasn’t supposed to know about these things. He was to exist in that place and only that place. No one could touch him there, hurt him there…love him there.

“Hey, hey,” a hushed voice whispered around a corner in the dark corridor. Kyuhyun followed the voice, sliding up against a wall and leaning out to see who it was. A handsome boy held Ryeowook against his lean body, arms intimately embracing the boy. “Why are you crying? Did someone harass you?” the boy chuckled, stroking Ryeowook’s hair.

 _Where’s the Stupid Bunny?_ Kyuhyun glared at the scene, cursing silently at the growing pain in his chest. Why the hell was it so irritating that night? He hadn’t done anything to bother it.

“Not gonna talk, huh?” the stranger remarked, smirking and leading the crying boy’s face up, “I’ll comfort you any time. Just come by…,” and then his lips were upon Ryeowook’s.

Kyuhyun whipped around, covering his face, eyes wide. He carried himself back to the dorm room, closing the door behind him as he sank to the ground, strength gone. What had been happening while Kyuhyun wasn’t looking? Who the hell was that guy? Why were they kissing? Where was the Stupid Bunny?

“Shit…,” Kyuhyun bit his lip, raking fingers through hair. He grabbed his phone off the table, dialing the only number in the Call History. It went directly to voicemail though. He chucked the phone across the room, squeezing his eyes shut. “I need you, Zhoumi…where are you?”

***

Zhoumi fell against Eunhyuk’s chest, sighing in content. “You’re too good at this,” he moaned, absently rubbing his sweaty body against the others, “How aren’t you tired?”

“You come over every other day,” Eunhyuk snorted, hands cupped behind his head. “I’m getting turned on from practically everything these days because of you.” He glanced down at the boy whose slick naked form pressing down on him. “But does he get you that hot that often? What the hell are you guys doing?”

“It’s just his voice…,” Zhoumi murmured, sounding like a shy boy, “and the way he hugs me like I’m more important than anyone else…,” he laughed silently, eyes warm, “I love the way we are together. It just makes me so happy.”

“Not trying to be judgmental, Mi,” Eunhyuk said, “but you’re saying that after sleeping with someone who’s not your boyfriend.”

Zhoumi swallowed hard, eyes narrowing and teeth grinding. “You’re the one who asked how we’re doing…”

“Yeah, glad you told me,” he replied, “and now I’m trying to figure out how you can keep doing this with me when you’re so _happy_ with him. Just go and have sex with him already.” Eunhyuk pushed his hair out of face, closing his eyes tiredly.

He really didn’t mind helping out a friend, especially when the circumstances were as such. However, there was a limit to what he could let his friend do. Zhoumi was losing his point, that immovable speck of light in the distance. The one that everyone must look at in order to remember why they do the things they do. Eunhyuk couldn’t follow him down anymore. It was time to catch him and start climbing back up.

Zhoumi sat up, brow furrowed. “What? But you know why I—”

“—yeah I do, but I doubt you do anymore.” Eunhyuk tousled his friend’s hair. “C’mon Zhoumi, you’re stronger than this. Stop it before you really do lose him.” He watched the emotions pass in a flurry over the boy’s features.

“…he’ll hate me.”

“What’s more important to you? The guilt or Kyuhyun?” he pushed Zhoumi back, climbing off the bed. “It’s been three months since we started this. Don’t you think it’s about time you just face the pain and look him in the eye? He won’t wait forever, or maybe he will. Who knows?” Eunhyuk pulled his clothes on, slipping into shoes and grabbing his keys and phone. Eyes trailed down to Zhoumi’s phone resting on the table.

“I’m not selfish…I’m doing this for our relationship,” Zhoumi said quietly, hugging the sheets to his body. “Kyuhyun…I can’t hurt Kyuhyun. I _can’t_ Eunhyuk! He’s too good to me. I don’t want that to change. Can’t you understand that?”

The older picked up Zhoumi’s phone, tossing it to him. “You’re not selfish. You’re being selfish though. You said you can’t hurt him right? While you were with me, you missed his call. He rarely calls you first, huh? So what do you think could’ve been so urgent that he actually called you?” Eunhyuk looked away, not wanting to see reality crash down on his friend. “It’s not too late, Mi…just hurry up.”

Zhoumi listened to the door shut firmly, but all he saw and felt was the icon flashing on his phone’s screen. That was the sole thing in the world. Nothing else could compare because, well, who was more important than your lover?

 


	33. Chapter 33

“Would you stop pouting?” Minho rolled his eyes, arms crossed over chest. “I didn’t even get my tongue in his mouth! I kiss strangers with more heat than that!”

“Yeah, I know,” nearly everyone in the room responded.

Minho grinned, “I’m really getting my name out there huh?”

“Not in a good way, stupid,” Sungmin scoffed, hugging Ryeowook close to him. After finding the boy and Minho lip locked in the hall, he wasn’t about to let Ryeowook go anywhere near the fiend. He took his eyes off Minho for _one second_ and the guy was pouncing on poor Wookie! The bastard…

“He was trying to comfort me…,” Ryeowook mumbled, blushing. He couldn’t believe that was the second time Minho had taken advantage of him. Why was it so easy to let down your guard in front of him? The guy had such good timing and such sweet words…Ryeowook shook his head, can’t believing those thoughts were passing through his mind.

Sungmin shot Minho a death glare. “You brainwashed him didn’t you?”

“How would I even do that?” he sighed. “Look, we’re wasting time arguing. We should get going. It’s already 8. Stores close at 11.” Minho slipped on a jacket, nodding at Taemin who stood up promptly. “Follow us.”

Grudgingly, Ryeowook, Sungmin, and Mir trailed after them, sneaking through the dark dormitory silently. They walked around the perimeter of the school, staying close to the shadows and vegetation. Although teachers were scarcely night patrolling, there were still a few. Plus, all of the StudGov members had issued a statement earlier that week, which read:

 

**~Attention Students~**

**Due to past years’ incidents,**

**Student Government has taken it upon themselves**

**to enforce justice and ensure safety.**

**Therefore,**

**Each member will be taking Night Campus Security duties.**

**Please cooperate and Happy Holidays!**

**Sincerely,**

**Student Government**

 

A flashlight narrowly missed them, catching the very tips of their shoes. Minho pushed everyone back, heart racing excitedly. They all watched for his cue to move and after a few terrifying moments, he motioned and everyone scurried ahead, ducking behind a heavily shadowed building as Vice President Yunho passed by with Teukie-hyung.

The leaders disappeared around a corner and it seemed as if a heavy sigh was released among the crooked students. “Are there any coming?” Ryeowook whispered.

“No,” Minho murmured.

“Whoever is fondling my ass, move your hand off right now,” Sungmin hissed.

“Taemin…get your hands out of there,” Mir said in a small voice.

“Sorry,” Minho and Taemin muttered.

Ryeowook blinked, looking around at the faces he couldn’t see. Well, at least it wasn’t him this time! A smile bloomed on his face in the dark and he hummed a tune inside his head, skipping along as Minho led the group closer to their transport point. A hand slipped into Ryeowook’s and the latter looked back, catching Sungmin’s face in a moment of dim light. They exchanged a short smile, facing forward once more to watch their leader’s movements.

Several minutes passed by before they came to a halt before a parked car just outside of the campus. The cabbie was standing outside, smoking and looking around. He caught sight of the approaching group of boys, a crooked smile crossing his lips. “If it ain’t the little fucker and his gaggle of friends,” the cabbie grunted.

“Yo,” Minho greeted, walking up to the man. “We need to get to the city is all. What do you want as payment?”

“Got that book I want?” Minho pulled out a thin novel, handing it over. The cabbie flipped through the pages, not really looking at the content. He stuffed the book into an inner pocket and opened the door in mock-sincerity. “All aboard.”

“Get in,” Minho stated, climbing in the front and shutting the door.

Mir opened the backseat door, sliding in. The agile pretty boy slipped in next, claiming Mir’s lap steadfastly. He wrapped his arms around the boy’s neck, smiling innocently. “You don’t mind do you?” he inquired blinking like an unknowing child.

“There’s room…,” Mir muttered futilely.

Sungmin sat in the middle, with Ryeowook beside him. The prior leaned forward, looking at Minho as the car began moving. “What is this?” he asked.

“He’s the ‘North Star’,” Minho answered, “He comes here at a certain hour every Friday and Saturday and is only willing to take one car load of people off campus, for a price. If you can’t meet his price then you’ll be stuck. He’ll only wait for ten minutes max before going back to work in the city. This is a part time thing—”

“—I think of it as serving my community,” the cabbie remarked.

“Yeah well anyway, he’ll help you out if it’s convenient,” Minho finished, “If you’re even one minute late for pick-up then he’ll ditch you in the city. It’s a risky situation for us.” He smirked, touching Sungmin’s cheek. “I don’t mind getting stuck in a big place like that with you though. We could find a nice hotel and—”

“MMPH!~”

Everyone turned around wincing as they saw what caused the noise. Sungmin covered Ryeowook’s eyes, protecting his innocence just a little. Minho whistled and smirked, “Damn, he really likes that Mir kid.”

Taemin forced his tongue down Mir’s throat, grinning and giggling into the intimate kiss. He cupped Mir’s face, holding the latter firmly in place as he continued devouring his mouth and oppressing him. The victim uselessly moved his arms, unsure where to put them. Dark eyes slowly started to close, losing to the forceful kiss.

“Can someone stop them?” Sungmin sighed, shuddering and backing away, “Or maybe turn on some music to drown out the noise…”

“What’s happening?” Ryeowook asked, squirming under Sungmin’s hand.

Minho snickered, earning another threatening look from Sungmin. “Hey, you’re the one trying to protect him. I did the same thing to him at KUG. I don’t know why you’re hiding _that_ from the kid.”

“… _oh_ ,” Ryeowook muttered, heating up under the hand. “…Thanks Minnie.”

“Welcome.”

***

Minho, Ryeowook and Sungmin walked through the city, taking in society. It had been so long since they were among other people. Well, Ryeowook and Sungmin hadn’t seen people in a long time. As for Minho…who knew? Sungmin didn’t care to know either and he could bet his friend didn’t either. Mir had been forced to stay in the cab with Taemin, trapped in that effeminate’s clutches. It was divine punishment for ratting his friends out. Or maybe it was just because the world loved Taemin and wanted to spoil the pretty child.

They passed by elaborate window displays filled with colorful ornaments, glittering paper and decorations of all kinds. Mechanized toys moved around on platforms, some of them appearing to be classic characters from ballets and plays.

Ryeowook recalled a single memory of the _Nutcracker_ , the ballet he went to many years ago. It was one of the sweetest childhood experiences he had ever been allowed. On an afternoon close to Christmas, the orphanage received tickets to the _Nutcracker_ , taking along all of the best behaved children. Ryeowook and Kyuhyun were part of the dozen or so orphans picked. He could still recall the beautiful ballerina as she traipsed across the stage, dancing with her beloved Nutcracker. That was the moment Ryeowook realized how fortune comes about. It isn’t a flawless road. In fact, fortune lies at the end of a painful, twisting journey. Such a powerful thing is saved for the ones who are able to persevere, to press forward instead of settling. It’s easy to simply take a seat and watch the mayhem up ahead. However, it’s worth it to approach the chaos, because truly, something beautiful is lurking in the midst of hate and disaster.

Perhaps as a child, these thoughts were not so developed, but the concept was there; though again, on a smaller scale.

“You like that?” Minho prompted, catching Ryeowook off guard.

“U-Uh, sort of,” the boy murmured, smiling to himself, “it brings back good memories.”

“It’s a famous ballet,” Minho remarked, “and there’s a troupe performing it in this city.”

Ryeowook’s eyes widened and he swiveled around to fully face the other boy. “They’re performing the _Nutcracker_ here?” That was perfect… Kyuhyun would surely love it. He was sort of sour and stubborn but in the end, Kyuhyun loved theatrical things like that. It was a secret of his that only Ryeowook knew. The math nerd had a soft spot for singing and theatre, not that anyone was complaining about such a thing.

“Yeah, on December 23rd,” Minho said, pointing at an advertisement in the window display. “Did you wanna go or something?”

The immediate answer bubbling to the boy’s lips were “YES!” But then he stopped himself, heart sinking. Oh…of course…Kyuhyun wouldn’t want to do that. He had a lover, someone to spend the warmed holidays with. An orphan-in-arms couldn’t compare to the amount of loyalty and tenderness shared between two such people. And so, Ryeowook shook his head, smiling at Minho half heartedly, “I was thinking of what present to get my friend. He really likes this ballet so I was thinking of getting him tickets.”

“Do it quick then,” the boy advised, eyes trailing down to Ryeowook, “This will probably sell out in a matter of hours. Lots of city folk wanna feel classy so they dress up in silly little outfits and go out to watch the _Nutcracker._ ”

“Well how much are tickets?” Ryeowook inquired.

Minho read the flyer again, saying, “One ticket is $65.”

“…where can I buy them?”

The taller boy whipped around. How was he going to pay for such expensive tickets? It wasn’t like the school gave them an allowance. Unless Ryeowook somehow had a job or worked for KUG – hah, yeah right – then he had to have been broke like all of the other students. “You heard what I said right Ryeowook?” Minho said slowly.

He looked up and nodded, “So, where?”

“In there…but what are you going to do?” he called after the already leaving Ryeowook. Minho shook his head, confused. What was the kid planning? He shrugged, turning around and finding Sungmin missing. His heart skipped a beat and then he spotted the boy in question through a window. “Why are they so…,” Minho sighed, walking into the store Sungmin was occupying. They must have wanted to give him a heart attack. If he lost them it would be on his head.

Inside the clothing shop, Minho strode up to Sungmin who was holding a piece of attire in his small hands. _Make me scared, huh…well how about this?_ Minho smirked, coming around Sungmin and sliding his arms around the latter, pressing his body against backside. He kissed the smaller boy’s ear, blowing cool air on his skin.

“W-What are you doing?” Sungmin hissed, spinning around, clutching the garment to his body. “We’re in public stop that!”

Minho brushed off the complaints, instead looking at the pale pink sweater in Sungmin’s hands. It was fuzzy and warm looking with a wide, off-shoulder collar. Faint white stripes could be seen in the fabric. “You like that?” he asked indifferently.

Sungmin blushed, trying to push the sweater behind his back, but Minho stopped him, holding the piece of clothing by the hem. “N-No…,” Sungmin mumbled, casting eyes down.

Minho quietly studied the sweater, before letting it go and turning away from Sungmin. “…You’d look good in it,” and then he was leaving the store.

Sungmin gazed after Minho, befuddled. But…a smile crept over the slender boy’s face and he held the pink material close to his chest. “Thanks…,” he murmured to the receding figure.

 

Ryeowook grinned at the two stunned people as he continued waving around the two _Nutcracker_ tickets. “That old shopkeeper was so nice,” he remarked, tucking the slips of paper securely in his pocket and climbing back into the cab.

“Seriously how did you afford those?” Minho demanded. He wanted to know the secret to wealth too! And here he had been wasting time getting other people to buy him drinks and stuff when he could easily be doing all of that stuff.

Yes, it was nice getting free stuff but in return the bastards always wanted _something_. Minho wasn’t against those things but he wasn’t exactly for quickies in dirty bathroom stalls or dark club corners. He liked long, sweaty, steamy sessions that lasted all night. That’s how sex should’ve been.

“Well we’ll have to come back to the city to make the money back…but that’s okay right?” Ryeowook said, smiling at Minho.

“What did you do Wookie?” Sungmin muttered, looking intently at the other boy.

“It’s a secret until we go next time,” he winked, giggling to himself.

“I need air…”

They all turned around to see Taemin pouting and leaning away from Mir for the first time all night. He had his arms crossed over chest. “It’s only been an hour,” Taemin complained, “we’re just kissing too!” Mir’s eyes rolled back and he fainted right there in the back seat. The pretty boy looked around at the staring faces and shrugged, encircling Mir’s neck with his arms, “What? We were! I promise…”

“I thought Minho was the bad one,” Sungmin remarked in the silence.

 


	34. Chapter 34

They didn’t utter a word to one another. There was nothing to be said. The world had shattered, the fog had lifted, the truth had been spoken and here they stood, unable to be around one another comfortably anymore. Perhaps that was why the world had shoved off so many others for so long. The effects were too destructive.

Ryeowook had had such a good time with the others that what happened between him and Kyuhyun slipped his mind. It was understandable though…he had wanted to forget about the words said. He hadn’t wished to say those things and yet they came. Now it was permanent, there was no way to rebuild such a carefully constructed shield.

 It was over.

“…I’m going to take a shower,” Ryeowook mumbled softly, hurrying towards the door. There was no answer, not even a noise.

The door shut and Kyuhyun straightened his back, eyes closing in exhaustion. This was unacceptable. How were they supposed to _live_ together when it was difficult to just talk? Kyuhyun wasn’t about to cave and start the fight. He couldn’t. It was impossible to even think about bringing up what had happened. Every time that image of Ryeowook kissing some guy who wasn’t even the Stupid Bunny pissed Kyuhyun off to no end. Where the hell did other people get off touching Ryeowook so casually? One was enough but now _two?_

He didn’t like it. Period.

The phone beside him vibrated. Kyuhyun released a heavy sigh. _Thank god…_ If he kept thinking about everything at some point that massively intelligent brain of his would implode. He answered the call immediately, not bothering to check the Caller I.D. “Hello?” he said.

“I’m sorry for not calling you back yesterday,” Zhoumi said quickly, remorsefully.

Kyuhyun sat forward. “So why are you calling back now when you didn’t think I was important enough yesterday? You think this means anything?” He knew it was the stress making him snap at Zhoumi. The latter hadn’t done anything. There was no reason to yell at him…but Kyuhyun was angry, angry at the entire outside world. They were all responsible for tearing them apart.

If no one had dared to touch Ryeowook then the balance could’ve been maintained. If Kyuhyun hadn’t been tempted to sneak out that crack in the barrier…if someone hadn’t found that crack and used it to destroy their careful balance… Kyuhyun rubbed his forehead, forcing the thoughts to submerge. It was too damn infuriating.

“…I want to spend Christmas with you, Kyu,” Zhoumi whispered.

“You’re not answering my—”

“—I want to spend the night of Christmas Eve with you, Kyu,” Zhoumi cut off, voice rising a bit at the statement. When Kyuhyun didn’t answer, Zhoumi repeated his words, “…I want to be with you the entire night Kyuhyun…just us, nothing else.”

“Okay.”

***

Ryeowook shuffled back down the hallway after his bath, a towel around his neck. There were some other people passing by as well, talking and laughing about a number of things. Ryeowook was sort of jealous. It looked like fun to be walking around with your friends like that, surrounded by so many people you could never run out of interesting things to talk about.

Until Sungmin and Mir had come along, Ryeowook had never paid any mind to the obnoxious groups of people. He had been content with just Kyuhyun. If they were together it was always calm and warm. Without any problems to disturb them, life may have been a bit dull but at the same time it was the least worrisome. When chaos didn’t exist, everything could flow as it pleased, even time became a dismissible factor. Ryeowook had loved, nearly would’ve sworn to die, to keep such peace.

But somehow, even with those intentions, something had come to pollute the air he breathed. His thoughts had become about himself rather than Kyuhyun. When he thought of the person who had Kyuhyun’s heart…it left behind dark emotions, the kind that he had never felt before. It burned and gnawed and made him think horrible thoughts. Kyuhyun’s happiness hadn’t mattered to him for the first time. All Ryeowook wanted was for that intruder to be pushed out. But instead of pushing the lover out, he had pushed Kyuhyun and himself out. The safe haven had been taken by the mayhem.

“Hey it’s snowing!”

Ryeowook turned his head, looking out one of the large, beautifully crafted windows. And there, just as the passerby had said, snow was falling. The tiny pure flakes twirled towards earth, beginning to coat the dirtied land with its cleansing white blanket. It would swarm the ugly and bring forth an illusionary beauty.

But it was breathtaking nonetheless.

He stared at it for a long time, sinking deeper and deeper into the calm dance. _Don’t let it end…_

 


	35. Chapter 35

Yesung smiled apologetically at the three underclassmen. “Teukie-hyung and the other members have a Christmas party in the Honors Dorm every year, so I have to go to that.” He ruffled Ryeowook’s hair, paying extra mind to the young boy. “I’m sorry. Forgive me, okay?”

“Okay…,” Ryeowook blushed, smiling up at the object of his admiration, “I hope you receive good presents this year, hyung!”

“So cute~!” Lee Joon cried, tackling Ryeowook with a crushing hug. The younger yelped, stumbling and hitting Yesung who easily caught him. “I’ve been wanting to do this since I first met you, little guy,” Joon sighed, grinning and squeezing Ryeowook tighter.

Sungmin kicked the third year behind his knees, watching as he folded to the ground awkwardly. “Don’t grab people like that,” he scolded, swinging Ryeowook around and hugging him protectively.

“Hyung…so embarrassing,” Mir muttered, shaking his head at Joon.

“He’s adorable though!” the elder argued, getting up and slinging his arms around Yesung’s shoulders. “Right, Yesungie? Look at how tiny he is! And that voice too! It’s so small!”

“He’s not a baby,” Yesung murmured, “you’re coming to the party too, right Joon?”

“You’re in the Honors Dorm?” Sungmin blurted, pointing rather rudely.

Joon stuck his tongue out at the first year, frowning. “Yeah I am! I’m not as stupid as you think I look. Isn’t that right, Yesung?” He snuggled closer to the handsome third year.

“Get off,” Yesung sighed, not doing anything to move the person though, “And yes Sungmin, he is unfortunately.”

Ryeowook was staring at Joon with big eyes full of admiration for whatever reason. He took a step towards the older boy who still clung to Yesung and proceeded to pull on Joon’s sleeve. “Hyung…,” Ryeowook began, still ogling the upperclassmen.

“What is it?” Joon piped up, grinning.

Ryeowook blushed and then said in a small voice, “How did you get so close to Yesung-hyung?”

“Jealous?” Joon prompted, leaning forward.

“Well…Yesung-hyung is so cool…,” his eyes flickered up to the one in question and a redder color tinted his cheeks, “I-I was just wondering how you got to be so close to him.”

“It’s because we’re childhood friends,” Yesung interrupted, smiling down at Ryeowook kindly, “and he’s more of a bother than anything.” The admirable hyung winked and the first year swooned, bumping back into Sungmin who was ready to catch the fanboy.

Sungmin sighed under his breath. It was a sure thing that Ryeowook would lose his footing when Yesung smiled. But then the latter had to wink too. That was like immediate victory in a Sudden Death video game round. “Gosh, Yesung-hyung,” Sungmin said in a scolding tone, “Don’t do that to us. We’ll get flustered.”

Yesung’s eyes flitted in surprise and he tilted his head innocently. “I’m sorry. Was I getting too close?” He looked worried then, backing up a bit with Joon still attached to him. “Actually, I have to head to a council meeting so club is adjourned for today. Make sure Ryeowook eats something, Sungmin. And to everyone,” he smiled, lowering his head slightly, “have a good long break and don’t get into too much trouble! I’ll send out an email for the next club meeting after Winter Break.” Yesung walked out of the Tech Shop with Joon trailing after him, arms around the prior’s waist. The other Techies left in a group through the other exit, waving and saying goodbye to the three freshmen left in the dim, familiar place.

“They’re dating,” Mir stated in the quiet.

“What?” Sungmin and Ryeowook gasped.

Mir shrugged, looking at them as if it weren’t that big of a deal. “They don’t act like it but I’ve seen them when they stay after hours to finish working on technical stuff for club.” He blushed and shuffled his feet.

Sungmin glanced at Ryeowook, expecting to see him crushed. Normally fans don’t like to hear that their bias is dating someone. It ruins the possibility of ever having a shot with him or her, in this case, him. Sungmin prepared to comfort the boy but instead he found himself staggering back a bit from what he saw.

The boy was wide eyed, hands clasped together in front of him. He was the very image of someone who had been struck by hope. Ryeowook turned to Sungmin, smiling widely, eyes sparkling. “Wow…Yesung-hyung has someone so special to him! I hope I can be just like him…,” a pink color dusted his cheeks, “Hyung’s the best, Minnie!”

“You’ve gotta be kidding,” Sungmin collapsed against the boy, laughing softly. “Well, I guess this is okay. Anyway, we should start getting ready for the Christmas Party! It’s tomorrow after all!”

***

 

They had hijacked a number of decorations from the storage closet in the dorm. It was simple. All they had to do was go during dinner when everyone was in the Dining Hall. If there were any passersby then…well, invite them to the party and no one would care! In total three storage rooms existed, each one jam packed with holiday decorations from years past. Some of it was outdated but who cared? So long as it felt like Christmas then no one would mind.

Sungmin kicked his door shut, dumping a pile of random goodies on the wood floor. Mir and Ryeowook were already sorting through their separate stacks, finding reindeer ornaments, tinsel, streamers, ribbons, and bells. Several Santa hats were thrown in there as well.

Holiday music filled the room and Sungmin raised an eyebrow. Ryeowook smiled sheepishly, a Santa hat fixed upon his head. “I thought it would make this more fun,” he explained.

“Why do you have that on your MP3 though?” Sungmin asked, grinning and laughing.

“It keeps me warm when I’m walking to class during winter,” he replied cheerily, skipping back over to Mir, tripping on some tangled lights. Ryeowook squeaked, falling and knocking over the other boy. “Sorry Mir.” He mumbled, rubbing his arm which had ungraciously slammed into the floor.

The door clicked open then and the trio turned up to the sound of someone gasping. Taemin stomped over, jerking Mir up off the ground, knocking Ryeowook over in the process. He hugged the boy possessively, glaring at Ryeowook. “Don’t touch other people’s belongings,” Taemin snapped.

“Aw, you okay?” Minho smirked, crouching before Ryeowook. His fingers caressed the latter’s chin. “You want me to kiss the pain away?”

Sungmin kicked Minho in the thigh, effectively knocking the boy off the balls of his feet. “Stop violating people, stupid.” He picked up a string of lights, hopping up on a bed and hanging them on the wall.

“Great view by the way,” Minho whistled, sitting back on the ground, observing the boy stretching and decorating.

Ryeowook sighed, smiling at the easy going atmosphere in the room. They were loud and sort of crazy but at those times, Ryeowook found it the easiest to relax. He could breathe around them. Nowadays, seeing Kyuhyun practically sent him into a choking fit; just seeing that face made Ryeowook go quiet, a thick lump forming in his throat.

“Here let me do it,” Mir cut into Ryeowook’s thoughts, taking the tinsel from the boy and hanging it on the miniature Christmas tree sitting on the windowsill. He smiled faintly and waved his hand subtly for Ryeowook to come closer.

“What is it?” the latter whispered, glancing backwards to see if Taemin would toss him aside. Thankfully the pretty boy was talking to Minho about something, leaving Mir alone for the first time since Ryeowook had met him.

Mir removed a small music box from his pocket, setting it down next to the fake tree after winding it up. He carefully lifted the lid and a delicate tune drifted through the noisy room. However, Ryeowook and Mir could clearly hear it. “I woke up one day in an orphanage.  They told me that I was unconscious in the street. I didn’t remember anything,” his eyes lowered a bit, focusing somewhere much further away in the recesses of his mind, “I still don’t remember anything from before then. The people looking after me said they would look for my documents but nothing has come up. I was getting really impatient and upset…to make matters worse there was this one kid who kept bullying me. I seriously wanted to disappear, find another street and collapse in it.”

“…Why are you telling me this?” Ryeowook asked softly.

“Because,” his eyes flickered back to the present and he touched the edge of the music box, “when Christmas came along that year, I didn’t think I would be getting anything, not even a Merry Christmas. But when I woke up the next day and everyone rushed to look through their stockings, I found this little box under the tree. My name was on it.” Mir blushed a bit, “It’s a cheesy story I guess. But anyway, the sender was my bully and when I asked why he would give me something like this he said ‘I don’t know. Just because.’” Mir took a deep breath, closing the music box and slipping it back in his pocket. “Sometimes people do things without knowing why themselves. But if the intention is good, even a little bit, then there’s always room to change…,” he patted Ryeowook’s head, “…there’s so much change…you can’t avoid it. You can’t ignore it either. You have to confront it and maybe you’ll be able to understand even when that person cannot.”

Ryeowook opened his mouth to say something but then Taemin was wedging himself between them, latching onto Mir like a leech. He stuck his tongue out childishly at Ryeowook, proceeding to murmur embarrassing things in Mir’s ear.

“S-Stop it,” Mir mumbled, fumbling to get away from Taemin.

Ryeowook smiled, glancing at his jacket which was slung over a chair.

“How are we getting food?” Minho inquired, looking around at the others.

Sungmin cursed, jumping down from the bed and snatching his wallet from a drawer. The boy opened it up, counting out bills. “We don’t need a lot of food do we?” Sungmin asked the people in the room. Everyone shook their heads. “Good because I don’t have enough money.”

“How do you even have money?” Minho frowned, standing up. Seriously, how did Ryeowook _and_ Sungmin have enough money to host a party?

“Off-campus martial arts competitions,” Sungmin replied distractedly, “the prizes are cash.”

“They let you off campus?” Minho demanded.

“One of the administrators accompanies me but yeah, they let me go.” Sungmin changed the subject then, saying, “I need to get off campus tonight. Can you take me?”

Minho swallowed a snarky comment and nodded. “All of you right?”

“Uhm, I have to do something,” Ryeowook said quietly, shrugging helplessly.

“I wanna spend more time with Mir,” Taemin stated, hugging the other boy.

“So it’s just us?” Minho cocked an eyebrow at Sungmin.

Sungmin bit his lip, brow furrowing. Was there really no other way…? He glanced at the clock, seeing the time display. There was no more time to waste. He sighed. “…Yeah. It’s just us.”

 


	36. Chapter 36

Ryeowook quietly entered the dorm room only Kyuhyun occupied. The latter didn’t look up, just kept reading his book upon the bunk bed. It was sort of intimidating, at least for Ryeowook. He never knew what it was like to be scared of Kyuhyun. This was new. It was change.

Right. Just like Mir said. Nothing can stay the same forever. Everything is constantly changing. Sometimes it’s for the better and sometimes it’s not. But that’s a fact that you have to face. Ryeowook swallowed hard. His entire body screamed “run away” but that wasn’t the point. You can’t walk away when something is displeasing you or scaring you. In order to reach the light at the end of the tunnel, you can’t stop halfway. You have to keep walking forward lest you be caught in an even darker, lonelier place. No one will hear you if your voice is locked away and your body is chained somewhere isolated.

“Kyuhyun, can we talk?” Ryeowook stated, squeezing his eyes and fists shut.  

There was moment’s silence before the boy set his book down and said, “About what?”

Ryeowook slowly opened his eyes, surprised at how relieved he was that Kyuhyun was talking to him. It felt good to hear the other boy’s voice…so good that Ryeowook wanted to cry. He missed it so much… “Uh,” he stuttered, scrambling to collect his thoughts. He hadn’t expected Kyuhyun to actually agree. “I’m…I…,” he took a slow deep breath and started again, “I’m happy you’re happy, Kyu!” Ryeowook kept his eyes down.

Kyuhyun swung his legs over the edge of the bunk, eyeing Ryeowook weirdly. “What are—?”

“—it’s good that you found someone to care so much about!” Ryeowook went on, knowing that if he allowed Kyuhyun to talk, he would never get out everything he wanted to say. “You’re my most important person so…so even though I’m shocked and little upset that you didn’t tell me about your boyfriend…from the bottom of my heart I want you to be happy!”

Kyuhyun didn’t attempt to speak this time. He simply watched the boy whom he had thought he knew, speaking his mind so clearly. It was eye opening, to say the least. But Kyuhyun couldn’t say that it was the first time. Surely it was the polluted haze they swam in for so many years that screwed up his view of Ryeowook. Perhaps the boy had been changing for a long time already…maybe Kyuhyun just hadn’t seen it.

The boy stuck out his hand, two tickets shoved in front of Kyuhyun. “I really mean it, Kyu,” his voice had softened, calming, “These are two tickets to the _Nutcracker_. Take your most important person on Christmas and make lots of good memories. Please…”

Kyuhyun took the two slips of paper, tucking them in his back pocket. “Can I talk now?” he asked, staring at the boy who still refused to lift his head.

Ryeowook nodded stiffly.

“You…how many people have you kissed aside from me?”

He finally lifted his head, eyes wide in shock. “What are you talking about Kyu?”

“Answer,” Kyuhyun ordered, gazing down at him.

“…T-Two…,” Ryeowook mumbled, blushing, “why are you asking?”

“Were either of them your boyfriend?”

“…no…”

Kyuhyun frowned. “Why did you kiss them?”

Ryeowook looked at his roommate helplessly. “I didn’t initiate them…,” something flickered across his features and a darker blush stained his cheeks, “well for the most part I guess…but why are you asking?”

“I saw you kissing someone,” Kyuhyun stated casually, eyes indifferent, “I imagined I would catch you one day kissing that Stupid Bunny but it wasn’t him. So I was wondering who it was.” He shrugged. “I’m not that curious though.”

Ryeowook felt compelled to explain. Although their relationship had shifted – incredibly so, might it be noted – there was still a great part of Ryeowook that needed to tell Kyuhyun everything. He wasn’t used to keeping things from the other boy and he doubted that would ever change. “His name is Minho…it’s sort of complicated but I think we’re friends. He really likes Minnie I think, even though he teases him a lot.”

“…What are you doing for Christmas?” Kyuhyun asked quietly, the atmosphere shifting with the change of his voice.

“A party…,” Ryeowook replied, feeling awkward but maybe he wasn’t the only one. “A group of us are going to do a gift exchange and stuff…”

Kyuhyun nodded slowly, turning around and reaching behind some pillow and blankets. Ryeowook watched him intently, trying to figure out what Kyuhyun doing. The latter twisted back around and tossed a small box at the standing boy. “Merry Christmas,” he murmured, swinging his legs over the edge and laying down on the mattress, “Night.”

Ryeowook opened the box, heart pounding. Inside was a flash drive. To say he was disappointed would be an understatement. As whiny as it sounded Ryeowook had hoped for a better gift than a flash drive… But maybe this was the Kyuhyun he had never known. This was the Kyuhyun that had never been shown to him; the one that would give their oldest friend a scratched up flash drive for Christmas.

Before he could get sadder about the present though, Kyuhyun’s voice was filling the room, saying, “It’s on the flash drive, dummy.”

“Oh…,” Ryeowook flushed, smiling and glancing up at Kyuhyun’s somewhat obscured form. He walked over to where his school issued laptop sat on the desk, unplugging it and bringing it over to his bunk bed. Ryeowook flicked off the room lights, grabbed his headphones, and set up the laptop and flash drive.

The window popped up on the screen and Ryeowook clicked on the only file on the drive. It was a video. He turned up the volume, hearing his favorite voice in the world play gently in his ears. On the screen, Yesung-hyung was sitting on a black stool, speaking into a camera and smiling. “Your roommate, Kyuhyun, tells me you like my singing?” he chuckled and cleared his throat, “He asked me to make a cover collection of all your favorite songs so here I am…I hope they’re okay.”

Ryeowook covered his mouth, stopping a scream as that beautiful, powerful voice filled his ears. It was perfect… He looked up at the flat black bottom of Kyuhyun’s bunk frame. _You’re perfect too Kyu…you’re too perfect…._

 

Kyuhyun gazed at the elaborately designed ballet tickets, eyes tracing the graphics. He brushed his thumb across the flat, smooth surface, a somber expression etching itself upon his face. Really, Kyuhyun imagined his emotions a number of way. He had seen himself angry or sad or happy, along with all of the minor emotions in between. The one scenario he had failed to acknowledge, to imagine, had happened.

The tickets across from him should’ve made Ryeowook and his relationship better. It was the beginning of individualism. And yet all Kyuhyun wanted to do was tear the tickets apart and throw them out the window.

 


	37. Chapter 37

There were people everywhere, all of them doing last minute shopping for Christmas. Sungmin was really starting to get pissed off by the crowds. They were all moving in different direction without any mind for people moving opposite them. Every few moments Sungmin felt a random shoulder or leg or hand slam into him. “This is so aggravating!” he shouted at no one in particular, just in need of a release for the frustration.

Minho rolled his eyes and stepped in front of the smaller boy, taking his hand and leading him through the hoards. He broke the throngs of people, taking the brunt of stranger abuse and causing most of it as well. Several people turned to give him dirty look, to which Sungmin glared at them threateningly.

It took another five minutes of fighting to get to a convenience store. The pair stumbled inside, gasping and holding each other up. To think, such an experience could have such an effect. Minho shook his head in disbelief. “Damn, that was worse than KUG,” he muttered.

“What are you talking about?” Sungmin grumbled, “That was bad but it was nothing like KUG.” He dusted his jacket and pants off, removing gloves afterwards and stuffing them in his pocket. “Then again, I guess you’ve never been the person molested.”

Minho skimmed through the aisles right beside Sungmin. “Nope. I like touching more than being touched. You can understand that can’t you Sungminnie?” he smirked at the boy’s scowl. “So what do we need for the party?”

“Just get some junk food,” Sungmin sighed, grabbing bags of chips and other assorted goodies, “but make sure they’re cheap. I don’t wanna waste all my money on moochers.”

“You’re the host though,” Minho grinned, grabbing a case of sodas, “I’m sure they don’t see themselves as anything but guests.”

“Shut up,” Sungmin snapped, walking over to the counter and paying for the stuff. He handed the bags of food and drinks to Minho who took it without really thinking. By the time he realized what had happened they were already walking down the street, avoiding the busy intersections.

“Cheater,” Minho growled at the smiling boy, “Why do I have to carry all of this?”

“You’re gonna be eating it and you’re using my dorm room for the party,” he replied without missing a beat. “Where’s the cab?”

Minho shook his head. “He said that it’s busy tonight so we’ll have to wait until the shopping district closes for the night before we can get a ride back. Weren’t you listening when he told us in the cab?”

“I was busy thinking about the party tomorrow,” Sungmin slumped, crossing his arms and gnawing on his lip. “Man…we’re gonna be stuck around here for that long? Where do we go?”

“You don’t wanna stay out here?” he grinned, avoiding a kick from the other. “It’s just a joke, Sungminnie~!”  Minho laughed, side stepping another attack. “Seriously though, we can go to any of the tourist attractions y’know. I hear there’s a light show tonight.”

Sungmin stopped trying to hit the agile boy, blinking. “A light show? What kind of light show?”

“I don’t know but it’s around the big Christmas tree,” Minho replied, turning and walking forwards. “Follow me, ‘kay?”

Nodding skeptically, Sungmin stayed close to Minho as they entered a busy district. Holiday music played through speakers at the tops of light posts, enveloping all of the couples with the sweet essence of the warmest holiday. Sungmin briefly thought about how they must look but then shook it off. They weren’t and that was the point. It didn’t matter if everyone else thought they were a couple so long as Sungmin knew they were barely friends.

“Do you like this song?”

Sungmin jolted, looking up at Minho. “Huh?” He listened closer to the song and then nodded, “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer is a good song. You like it…?” He internally slapped himself for sounding so awkward. It just wasn’t everyday he spoke casually with Minho. Normally after two minutes the latter would be making cheesy pick up lines vulgar remarks.

But Minho simply nodded and kept walking not looking at Sungmin like the boy was a piece of meat. “It’s my favorite Christmas song,” he explained as they entered a large square encircled by bright gold lights. A directed a smile at Sungmin, face illuminated by the large, twinkling pine tree rising out of the center of the square. Thick red velvet ropes blocked anyone from getting too close to the abnormally huge decoration.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Sungmin blurted unable to look away from the other boy, “It’s weird.” See, why couldn’t Minho be normal more often? This way they had no problems with one another.

He chuckled, eyes shifting over to the main attraction. “Have you ever noticed that every orphan has some special memory about Christmas time?” Sungmin nodded slightly. “Taemin and I ran away from some crazies and we hid in toy store for two days. During that time, their music player was broken so it played Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer the whole time. But that was the best Christmas we ever had.” Minho shrugged off handedly but Sungmin had already seen the smooth talker lower his defenses.

He stifled a smile, stepping a bit closer to Minho and taking one of the grocery bags. “I guess I broke the pattern then,” Sungmin sighed, flashing a small grin, “When I was little, my parents and I travelled so much there was never a time to celebrate holidays. On Christmas especially, we would be busy with something or other. If there had been a memory of it I’ve forgotten already. When I was six or seven, we got into a car accident. Both of them passed away a few days after being admitted into the hospital. But when I finally woke up,” he was quiet for a moment before continuing, “a bunch of years had passed by. I got thrown into an orphanage for mentally unstable kids.”

Lights flashed in the square, images being created against the black sky. Although they had come to see just that, neither noticed it. Minho was fully turned towards Sungmin now, his lips parted in silent words. “They thought I would go crazy because so many things had changed in the five years I was asleep. The facility didn’t believe in holidays, or rather celebrating holidays. So until this year…well this is my first Christmas.”

“Why…Why are you telling me this?” Minho dropped the groceries and without fully understanding himself, he was hugging Sungmin tightly, burrowing his face in the soft scarf around Sungmin’s neck.

“It’s not that big of a deal…,” Sungmin stammered, “W-Why are you hugging me?”

“Because you had parents,” he mumbled, “you can still remember them. We never had a connection to begin with. But you…you _had_ them. You had that warmth…it’s not fair that you lost it. Compared to me, to us,” he pushed Sungmin’s black hair back, gazing down at the boy, “you’ve been through hell of a lot more.”

Piercing fireworks broke the moment as Sungmin’s head shot up to follow the display. Colorful shapes filled the sky. He smiled, a white puff of air bursting from his lips. “Look Minho—”

“—look at me.”

Sungmin felt his eyes wander back to Minho and suddenly his knees were going weak. The taller boy had the strangest expression. It was difficult to describe…somewhere between pity and sympathy and something else. “W…Why…?” he breathed, eyelids growing heavy the longer he kept eye contact with Minho.

“Look at me…,” he whispered, pushing Sungmin’s scarf down as he leaned forward, eyes falling closed oh-so slowly, “because you’ve touched my heart…so let me touch yours.” A clock in the distance chimed in Midnight and cheers echoed all around them. It was a somber ringing of bells, something that seemed perfectly in tune to a traditional holiday.

“I…” But the words were lost as gentle lips found Sungmin’s. He gasped into Minho’s mouth, having a hard time keeping his eyes open. There was nothing heated about the way it felt. It was as if the person standing before Sungmin wasn’t the same as Ryeowook’s harasser. Sungmin’s eyes squeezed shut, hands pressed against the taller boy’s chest.

Minho brushed a light kiss over the smaller one’s cheek, murmuring, “It’s not Christmas yet…but I hope you’ll remember this as your first Christmas Eve.” He smiled faintly in that same breathtakingly tender way.

“L…Let’s go,” Sungmin mumbled, fixing his scarf and grabbing both bags of groceries. His face was burning, entire body warm and humming with unused energy. In the past, Sungmin had always imagined the moment Minho succeeded in making a move. However, in those scenarios, he would’ve pushed the offender off before anything like a kiss could happen.

But it had happened, somehow.

Neither said a word, leaving for an incredibly quiet car ride back. The cabbie didn’t dare strike up conversation. He just stuck to the road, trying to get those two kids back to the school as soon as possible so he wouldn’t have to suffer with that unusual atmosphere for much longer.

Sungmin climbed out of the cab the moment the car stopped moving and then he was darting away, leaving Minho alone. It was too embarrassing to look at the boy. How could he fall for that guy’s tricks? Obviously they were tricks. Sungmin knew something like this would happen the moment he agreed to go with just Minho. It was bound to happen. Now it had though and there was no way to turn back. Sungmin had been played by some bastard with a cute smile.

The back door to the first year dorms was thrown open by Sungmin and he stealthily climbed the stairs to his floor, praying that Minho was far behind. That prayer was short lived. Sungmin felt someone’s hand wrap around his wrist, jerking him around.

“What are you doing?” he whisper-yelled, looking up at Minho.

“Stop running and come with me,” he stated, dragging Sungmin to his dorm room.

“Just because of what happened doesn’t mean anything!” Sungmin rambled, pulling and tugging at the steely grip on his wrist, “That was a mistake! We shouldn’t have done that. I didn’t want to kiss you, Minho! You understand that don’t you?”

Minho released Sungmin, disappearing into his room for a few moments before coming back out and pushing a wrapped present into Sungmin’s hands. “It was just a kiss,” Minho said in the quiet hallway, standing in the well lit threshold. The beautiful smile that had been painted on his face not so long ago was utterly gone. All that was left was his arrogant smirk. The tall boy turned on his heel, voice dropping to a hushed whisper, “…Merry Christmas. I told you before…you’d look good in it.” And then the door closed, clicking gently as it left Sungmin in the darkened hallway, holding a present.

He didn’t have to open it to know what was inside. _Maybe the holiday season leaves everyone a little kinder, purer, cleaner…_


	38. Chapter 38

Mir put up a halting hand, watching the confused pretty boy. “Stop.”

“Why~?” Taemin whined, trying to bypass the stiff arm and get at the other boy. “I wanna touch you! What’s wrong with that…?” He pouted, crossing his arms.

“A lot of things,” Mir sighed, exasperated, “but that’s not the point. Tell me, why are you doing these things? I know that you think I’m physically attractive but that shouldn’t dictate your taste in people. You should find someone who makes your heart warm.”

Taemin stared at the straight-laced first year for a long time before shrugging and placing a kiss in Mir’s upheld hand. The latter flinched but firmly kept his ground…that is, until the lighter haired boy started licking his fingers and running hands all over his skin.

Mir’s eyes grew and he jerked away, confused and slightly terrified. “How did you turn that into something sexual?” he demanded, blushing and wiping his hand.

A frown creased the boy’s lips and he hurried up, diving to knees and rapidly undoing the standing one’s pants. “You’re too easy, Mir,” Taemin giggled, pressing a kiss to the head of his member, “So cute~!”

Electric currents jolted Mir’s system. His muscles tightened and loosened all together and next thing he knew, everything was flipping. Mir crashed to the floor. There was no time to recover though as Taemin continued his ministrations without missing a beat. The effected boy covered his mouth, back arching off the ground when he felt his length fully taken by a warm space.

Taemin swirled his tongue around the now fully erect member, chuckling low in his throat at Mir’s reactions. He slurped and sucked, doing everything in his power to make the other boy release all those needy moans. It was like a high these days; just hearing those noises could get his adrenaline pumping and hormones raging. Taemin grazed the skin with teeth, grinning wickedly as he heard Mir’s hands slam into the floor, body writhing and rising higher off the ground.

A low groan escaped the weakened boy and his breathing grew into pants. His sweater was becoming too hot. The entire room was far too warm and there was no way to escape it. Mir looked around uselessly, shoulders and chest shaking and twitching with the increased sensitivity. “Mm…s-stop…?” Mir whimpered, eyes closing tightly as the heat and pressure on his length went up. Another unwanted moan rolled up out of his throat, urging Taemin to continue what he was doing.

“Sorry for coming back so late—”

Mir shot up, eyes wide and shocked. “T-Thunder! This isn’t...uhm, it’s not…”

Thunder stuck his hand out, grinned knowingly. “Sorry for interrupting you and your girl. I’ll just go find a friend’s to sleep at.” He shut the door without waiting for anymore of Mir’s half-baked explanations.

“I’m not a girl,” Taemin mumbled.

“Your hair is pretty long though,” Mir remarked, scrambling away from the boy and fixing his pants, his member’s issue already gone. Seeing your roommate stumble in like that really makes things…stop. “And you have a small build. Sorry that he said that though…”

Taemin shook his head, crawling forward towards Mir. “It’s nothing I guess. Hey why did you put your pants back on? We were barely started,” he cooed, straddling the nervous boy’s hips. They were pressing back against the wall now, somewhere between a ninety degree angle and something less comfortable. “Or maybe you wanted to do something else?” Taemin ran his hands up Mir’s black shirt with a soft giggle.

“I want to talk,” Mir stated, forcing firmness into his voice. He grabbed Taemin’s wrists, holding the touchy boy back. “I…I want to know,” a blush crept over his features, “…more about you…. Why do you have sex with people you don’t love? A-And why are you so set on me? You said before that you and Minho are friends with benefits, so why did you choose to start this stuff with me as well?”

Taemin smiled with his lips alone, the rest of his face indifferent. “I think you’re cute and Minho is just Minho. Are we done talking now?” He turned his head, trying to lick the inside of Mir’s wrist. The latter pulled it away, Taemin’s arm following the movement. “You’re learning,” he muttered, frowning.

“Yeah,” Mir cleared his throat, “and no we’re not done talking. You still haven’t told me why you have sex without love. What’s so special about doing it with someone who you barely know…?” He forced Taemin to look him straight in the eye. “Can you tell me?”

The pretty boy’s jaw tightened, eyes becoming more guarded. “What do you mean? Sex is just sex! It has nothing to do with emotions. Your body reacts because you see someone else. It’s not love that makes sex better. It’s still the same.” He wiggled away from Mir just a bit, “We haven’t even done anything like that yet. Why are you so curious?”

“Have you ever been in love?” Mir was speaking softer now, gently studying the boy in his lap.

“Does it matter?” Taemin snapped, his personality taking another 180 turn. “I know. I’ve seen it. There’s nothing special about lovers making love and fuckers fucking.”

“Who taught you that?”

Taemin took a deep breath, trying to break out of Mir’s grasp now. “Stop asking questions! We’re not even friends. I just wanna fuck you but you won’t let me so just let me go already!” He tried to stand up but Mir pushed him back down. “You’re so annoying…. This is none of your business. Just stay out of it.”

Mir was at his limit. He couldn’t get the words to leave his mouth anymore. It was already impossible that he had said so many honest things. But this had never happened to him before. Someone had never paid so much attention to him…and so he wasn’t sure what to do. Nothing made sense and reality was slowly slipping through Mir’s fingers. It was scary…not knowing again.

“I’m leaving, so let go,” Taemin demanded, clenching his fists and jerking harder away from the other boy. Mir didn’t say anything though, just looked at the innocent faced boy, willing him to understand what Mir couldn’t. Taemin however did not. “I said let go of me you, fucktard. There’s no reason for me to stick around if I can’t get in your pants.”

“…,” Mir slowly released Taemin but gently kept his hand around one of the slender boy’s wrists. Taemin prepared to yank his arm away but then something was being placed in his hand – a slightly heavy, bumpy object. Mir curled the other boy’s hand around the weight and let go of him fully. “That song…it helped me when I didn’t know where I was,” he said in a strained voice as if it were taking all his might to keep speaking honestly, “Keep it...maybe you’ll figure out why you feel the way you do. Merry Christmas, Taemin.”

The pretty boy walked out of the room without looking back, shutting the door behind him. As he ventured back to his own room, his eyes trailed down to the gift. Taemin stepped into a patch of moonlight, examining the precious, intricate music box in the palm of his hand. Gingerly, he twisted the knob in the back and lifted the lid. A sweet, frail tune drifted through the empty hall…

 


	39. Chapter 39

 

“MERRY CHRISTMAS~!” Ryeowook exclaimed, beaming at Sungmin who was setting out the last of the party’s goodies.

Sungmin looked up and smiled, running up and hugging the other boy. “Wookie! Merry Christmas! I hope you like your present!” He nudged his head towards a carefully wrapped box sitting on the dresser. “But you have to wait until Midnight, okay?”

“Uh-huh, Minnie,” Ryeowook chimed, blushing as he realized how close his face was to the other’s. It didn’t help that they stood in the same place their second kiss occurred, “O-Oh, by the way, Kyuhyun gave me a present.” The topic of Kyuhyun killed the air and Sungmin released Ryeowook, instead taking a seat on his bed. “It was really sweet…,” Ryeowook added, an overwhelmingly sweet smile crossing his lips.

“…So the Hound actually knows how to get good presents,” Sungmin scoffed, rolling his eyes.

Ryeowook studied Sungmin and suddenly hurried up to the boy, touching his pink sweater. It was fuzzy and slightly off the shoulder. Thin white stripes crossed the soft fabric. “So cute, Minnie,” he remarked, eyes saucer like as he continued brushing his fingers over the warm material, “When did you get it?”

“It was a present…,” Sungmin replied, suppressing the heat crawling up his neck.

“From who?” Ryeowook asked innocently, grinning like a child.

Sungmin’s gaze softened and he pulled the boy into a tight hug, snuggling close to him. “Aw…Wookie…,” he mumbled, enjoying the warmth emitted by the body lying on top of his.

“What a charming scene.” They sat up, heads whipping around to look at Minho. The latter was leaning against the door frame, smirking. Gliding inside, he took a seat on the empty bed. “Taemin said he’ll come by in a bit. Where’s that other kid, Mir?”

Ryeowook blinked, thinking about it. “I’m not sure actually…huh.”

“He’s probably studying before coming over,” Sungmin snorted, grabbing a soda.

“I hope not,” Ryeowook murmured, “he should relax on Christmas.”

“Makes you wonder…,” the other said softly.

***

Kyuhyun followed Zhoumi into the empty dorm room, quickly unwrapping the scarf around his neck. The second year’s room was empty as always but at least it was warm. “Can’t believe Teukie-hyung actually let us go off-campus,” Kyuhyun remarked, unzipping his jacket next and throwing all of the outside gear onto a chair.

“Well I think after you said it was for a ballet,” Zhoumi grinned, “he was more than willing to do it. It’s hard to justify prohibiting a student from culturing himself, right?” The older boy gently placed his jacket and muffler on the table top before walking over to where Kyuhyun sat on the bed. “How did you get those tickets anyway? They’re really expensive…or at least, that’s what I’ve heard from some friends.”

“Just a present,” Kyuhyun murmured vaguely, looking down at his lap, “…but more importantly Zhoumi, are you sure?”

He was about to respond with a question but then it all came flying back at him. During the _Nutcracker_ he had been so distracted, the thoughts left his mind. But now that Kyuhyun was bringing it all back…well, it all came back. Zhoumi exhaled slowly before taking his boyfriend’s hand and bringing it to his heart. “I…I’m serious about you,” he whispered, “I want to walk forward with you.” He laced their fingers together, bringing their clasped hands down between them. “I’m done with all of the problems and backtracking and insecurity…. You are all that should matter to me,” Zhoumi quietly swallowed, “I…I want to be with you from now on. I want to have your heart and mind and body Kyuhyun. I want everything.”

“…really?” Kyuhyun’s voice was nearly inaudible, but Zhoumi had heard it.

The older boy nodded only once and then tipped his lover’s head up, pressing a slow, warm kiss to his lips. “Yeah Kyuhyun…,” he breathed, tilting his head the other way, bringing more heat in the contact, “Let’s move forward.”

***

The dorm room was filled with loud music and laughter. All around people were telling jokes or stories, trying to gain the most attention. There must have been somewhere around ten boys trying to throw a party in a small dorm room. It wasn’t so bad at first but then the odors started mixing and the heat started suffocating…

Sungmin forced the window open, breathing in deeply. Cold air filled his body, acting like the greatest antidote for a fever. This was what his first Christmas was going to be like? How was that good in any way? It was probably the worst experience he had endured since entering the academy.

“Having fun?” Minho asked, coming up beside the boy and relishing in the cool air rushing over his skin. “It’s hotter than KUG in here.”

“It’s fun,” Sungmin answered, surprised by the immediateness of his own response. Okay, so maybe it wasn’t nearly as bad as he thought it would be. When he really looked around and saw all those smiling faces…it was difficult to truly be upset. Plus, it was Christmas. Sungmin wasn’t about to spend another holiday with the blues.

“M-Minnie, help!”

Sungmin spun around, seeing Ryeowook trapped in a corner across the room. Three boys surrounded him, each giving the small boy a weird little look. “Anyone who creeps on Wookie will get beaten halfway to hell, got that?” Sungmin called, glowering at the trio who caught his threatening look.

They backed away from Ryeowook, slinking off to play some sort of card game on a bed. Ryeowook smiled at Sungmin, waving for him to come over. “Sorry Minho, can I have Minnie for a little while?” he asked.

“Whatever you want, babe,” Minho smirked at Ryeowook. He then proceeded to pat Sungmin’s shoulder with the words, “I’ll be back. Gonna go find out where Taemin went.” Then he strode through the bustling room, looking like moving water.

Sungmin figured he could pull off the same thing. It didn’t work. There were too many unexpected legs jutting out or flying food or any other assortment of items that could threaten his well-being. He stumbled up to Ryeowook, smiling tiredly at the other. “What is it, Wookie?”

“Can we go outside for a little while…?” Ryeowook questioned, “Mir can handle it now that he’s here right? I promise it won’t be for long.”

Sungmin grabbed his jacket. “Sure, I don’t mind.”

***

_It’s just us…_

Kyuhyun deepened the kiss, pushing Zhoumi back onto the bed.

_No one else can hurt us here…_

Kyuhyun squeezed his eyes shut, nibbling roughly on the other’s bottom lip. His lower body pressed down on Zhoumi’s, keeping the older boy locked against the mattress.

_Do you see it? Right there, just close your eyes…_

Zhoumi sighed softly, wrapping his arms around Kyuhyun’s waist, stretching his neck to allow his lover’s travelling lips to gain more access to the soft skin there. Kyuhyun nipped and sucked, creating red marks without as much as a second thought.

_Is it bright and blue and grassy…?_

Kyuhyun slid one hand underneath the lying boy’s shirt, vaguely hearing a whimper from the cold touch. He planted a soft kiss on Zhoumi’s prominent collar bone.

_…Yes. If that’s what you see…_

Zhoumi lifted his arms over head letting Kyuhyun fully removed his shirt. The latter took the chance to disrobe as well. He ran his tongue over the older boy’s chest, a moan ringing through his ears.

_Yeah…I can see something dark in the distance though…_

Kyuhyun found Zhoumi’s mouth again, hands grasping either side of the tall boy’s face. Those long arms ran up and down the slopes of Kyuhyun’s body, sending pleasurable shivers through the boy’s bare skin.

_Don’t look. Only focus on this place…_

“I need more, Kyu,” Zhoumi panted, brushing his lover against the hardening object beneath the layers of clothing.

_How come?_

“Okay…,” he murmured, sliding down and unbuckling the older boy’s pants. Kyuhyun pushed the material down, palming the other through his undergarments. He nibbled at Zhoumi’s throat, suckling the skin tenderly.

_…Because this is where you go to get away from that darkness._

Kyuhyun’s fingers dug into the sheets, his teeth pressing too far into the skin. Zhoumi made a pained noise. “Sorry,” Kyuhyun mumbled, shaking his head and licking the swollen red area.

_Isn’t it dangerous to be blind to everything? Won’t we get hurt this way…?_

“Lower,” Zhoumi panted, raking fingers through his lover’s hair. Kyuhyun obliged, running the flat of his tongue over the hardening length, a layer of clothing still separating them.

_No…I’m here and you’re here, we’ll protect each other from everyone…_

Kyuhyun yanked the material down, frustration boiling inside of him. He stroked the length as he paid mind to the head.

_You’re the only one I can trust…, right?_

Kyuhyun took the entire member into his mouth, barely hearing the outright cry of pleasure his lover emitted. The pounding…the words…they were so incessant. It wouldn’t leave him alone, no matter how much he did to distract himself.

_Yeah…and you’re the only one I can trust too…_

“More, Kyu,” Zhoumi moaned, hips bucking against the ministrations.

_We’ll always be like this…here…right Kyu?_

Kyuhyun pushed his forearm down on the older boy’s pelvis, earning an annoyed groan and the sound of shifting bed sheets. He slurped up the liquid seeping from the member, swallowing without really knowing what he was doing.

_Forever, Wookie…_

It was all a lie. There was nothing left. The promises, the feelings, everything had fallen to ruin. He understood this already, so then why did the thoughts refuse to leave? Why did they taunt him as he ventured into unknown territory? Or maybe it wasn’t following him. Maybe it was the final chance.

Well screw that noise.

Kyuhyun didn’t want it. He wanted to be with the person beneath him. The memory faded to white in his mind, all those words drifting into nothingness. Zhoumi’s voice replaced it all, taking over in Kyuhyun’s brain.

Moving forward meant leaving behind everything.

***

“What is it Ryeowook?” Sungmin asked, rubbing his gloved hands together to generate some warmth in the chilly night.

Snow twirled down around them in languorous spirals, adding to the accumulated heaps. There were flood lamps all around them, creating golden pools on the pure, sparkling earth bound blankets. Only their footprints could be seen in the freshly fallen snow littering the stone path. It was sort of…sad, in a way. Ryeowook had always disliked ruining such a perfectly made snow blanket. It made him feel guilty, as if he were trampling on the last pure thing in the world.

“Merry Christmas,” Ryeowook stated, handing his friend a wrapped present, “Open it!”

“Why did we have to come all the way out here?” Sungmin laughed, taking the box and pulling the bow off it. He put the red decoration on Ryeowook’s head, grinning playfully. “So what’d you get me? Maybe it’s a coffee mug, or a hat, or a stuffed animal?” Sungmin tore the reindeer covered wrapping paper away, stuffing the torn slips into his pocket for proper disposal later.

“Just open it, already,” Ryeowook said, hiding his excitement well.

The dark haired youth pulled the lid of the box back, eyes running over what he saw. It was a snow globe. He carefully pulled it out, turning the delicate piece of art around in his hand. Inside the clear orb was an intricately crafted metal maple leaf. Sungmin’s eyes fell to the engraving on the metal plating: _P_ _er aspera ad astra_

“The maple leaf is a symbol of love,” Ryeowook explained, “I wanted to show my gratitude…and the best way I could think of doing that was by expressing the kind of feeling I get when I’m around you,” he paused briefly, blushing, “I don’t mean that it’s romantic or anything! I-I just meant that I love being around you and I’ve always had the urge to tell you that I love you. I don’t know if it’s anything like lover’s love but…anyway,” Ryeowook sighed, looking helpless, “the quote…it means ‘Through Difficulties to the Stars’.” He smiled with eyes on the snow globe, “We’ve been through a lot these past few months… It seemed like the best thing I could say to you. Because in the end, we’ll make it somewhere better. I know it.”

Sungmin gently set the object back into its box, further setting the box on the snowy ground. He removed his gloves, placing his hands on either side of Ryeowook’s face. “Everyone will end up better…? Do you really think that’s possible…,” he whispered, forehead brushing against Ryeowook’s.

The latter placed his hands on Sungmin’s upraised arms, offering another sweet smile. “Yeah…I do. We’ll be alright…all of us.”

“That would be nice,” Sungmin returned the smile, a hint of bitterness and wary touching the expression. “Your ending sounds like a really good one.” He sighed, “By the way, my gift sucks compared to yours. It’s like everyone knew it was my first Christmas and so they went all out.”

Ryeowook gasped. “It’s your first Christmas?” He took Sungmin’s hand, easily slipping out of the boy’s hands. “We have to get back to the party then! You should be enjoying it to the fullest, Minnie. You only get one first Christmas after all.”

Sungmin tugged Ryeowook back, arms winding around the hurrying boy’s body. “I don’t want to be in that stuffy room. I’d rather be in the cold, right here.” He leaned closer to Ryeowook’s face, eyeing the boy for any arguments. “Can we stay…for just a little bit longer? And then I promise I’ll go back to the party.”

“…Sure…,” Ryeowook mumbled, lowering his head to the crook of Sungmin’s neck. His arms lifted, subtly holding the black haired boy’s waist.

***

“You don’t mind?” Taemin remarked, coming up beside Minho. He leaned against the cold window, glancing down at the pair embracing outside. “You were getting pretty cozy with that Sungmin boy weren’t you?”

Minho’s gaze flickered over to Taemin. “I think they’re pretty cute together, actually.”

“Hmm,” Taemin grunted, pushing off of the chilly glass and wrapping his arms around Minho from behind. He settled his chin on the broader boy’s shoulder, smiling faintly, “You wanna be comforted? I’d love to help.”

Minho turned his body slightly, pressing his lips against Taemin’s. “I love being comforted.”

 


	40. Chapter 40

“We really shouldn’t be making a habit out of this,” Mir muttered, leaning back against the chilly cab door. He had his hands in his pockets, shivering in the late January air. They were at the end of Winter Break with one day left before the start of the new term. But that also meant saying goodbye to the seniors… Mir shook his head, looking over at where Ryeowook, Sungmin, and Minho were plotting something. He really didn’t want to be a part of that, yet somehow here he was, helping them get into more trouble.

“Are you sure about this, Wookie?” Sungmin mumbled as they all piled into the cab, “It seems like a pretty dangerous way of earning that money back.”

Ryeowook smiled, “Don’t worry, Minnie. I know what I’m doing.”

“Hope so, cutie,” Minho remarked, twisting around in the seat to look at Ryeowook, “I hear in this city they’ll make you pay with your body if you can’t pay with money—”

“Shut up,” Sungmin snapped, shoving a gloved hand in Minho’s face, “and where’s Taemin these days? I’m not complaining but he hasn’t been mauling Mir since December.”

“I guess he’s decided to leave your friend alone,” Minho stated casually.

Mir ignored the conversation, looking out the window at the dark moving trees...

 

_~ December 25 ~_

 

Mir hadn’t planned on looking for Taemin. He really didn’t want to know what the boy was up to. If he was getting into some bad situation, Mir didn’t want to have any part of it. Staying out of other people’s business had always been something he took pride in. There was no good reason to butt in when you were unneeded or ignorant. And quite honestly, hadn’t Mir done enough to try to help Taemin? At least…from Mir’s standpoint he had done everything in his power. But in other people’s eyes, it probably didn’t look like that.

He found himself walking through the dorm in search of the pretty honey-blonde. If Mir were to backtrack and understand why he had left the party for Taemin, he wouldn’t be able to find the reason. There surely was one but…

“I love being comforted.”

Mir jerked back, eyes catching sight of the pair kissing and holding one another. He hurried back down the hall, thinking too quickly to really understand what sorts of emotions were running through him. It was weird how he felt bothered by the sight. Why did the sight of Taemin kissing someone make Mir feel…disappointed?

The door to his dorm room was closed. Mir unlocked it, having given up on the party. Sungmin and Ryeowook would be back soon to take care of whatever chaos was destroying the room. He had had enough socializing for one night. The image of Taemin and Minho was also haunting him quite a bit more than a little, if that made sense.

Mir caught sight of Thunder sleeping on top of the sheets, perfectly content even in the somewhat chilly room. “Hey, get up,” Mir sighed, shaking his roommate. Thunder slowly rolled over, trying to get away from the noisy interruption. “You’re gonna catch a cold.” He jerked the sheets out from underneath the other boy, sending him flying at the wall.

“Jerk,” Thunder grumbled drowsily, tucking himself under the blankets that Mir through back over him. “Why aren’t you at that party anyway?” he mumbled, snuggling deep into the confines of the blue blanket, a relaxed smile on his lips.

“Got tired,” Mir muttered, sitting down at his desk.

“…Where’s that kid?” Thunder asked softly.

“Probably having sex,” Mir clamped his mouth shut, realizing how easily he had blurted something like that out. The sleeping teen shifted in bed and Mir sighed internally at the obvious reaction. He had hoped maybe Thunder hadn’t heard anything.

“Excuse me?” Thunder said slowly, sitting up in bed now, eyes trained on Mir.

“N-Nothing,” he said quickly, standing up, “Y’know, I think I’m actually gonna go for a walk.”

“Outside? This late?” Thunder was on his feet now, looking at Mir worriedly. “Are you okay, man? You’re acting sort of strange.”

“I’m fine,” he answered, throwing on his jacket, “Just…jittery, I guess.”

The other boy touched Mir’s shoulder, tugging on him slightly. “What’s going on? If you need to talk about anything…I know that you have a hard time talking but you can say anything. I’d listen, Mir.”

“Y-Yeah, I know,” he muttered, shrugging off the hand and walking to the door. “I just need to think about something. That’s all. …Thanks, though…I…I appreciate it.” Mir walked out of the room, not bothering to look it as he strode back down the hallway. His entire body was jumpy, as if he would fly straight out of skin from a tiny disruption.

There was no one around thankfully…and sort of not. It meant Taemin really was with Minho at that moment, doing unspeakable things. Mir pushed the door of the dorm building open, walking out into the cold night. He took a deep, refreshing breath, clearing his mind as best he could. It was useless though. There was only one thing polluting his mind and it wasn’t anywhere near done polluting.

Had it been wishful thinking to hope Taemin heard him? Mir was being too full of himself when he imagined Taemin understanding the meaning behind the music box. Perhaps it had been a mistake giving it to him. There were too many things Mir didn’t know about the other boy…about his past and all of that. He couldn’t properly help anyone when so much was being withheld.

“Mir, is that you?” The boy looked up, seeing Lee Joon coming towards him. He waved slightly, coming to a stop as the elder came up to him. They stood near a flood lamp, both faces somewhat lightened by the beacon. “Getting fresh air?” Joon guessed.

“Yeah,” Mir nodded, “Same thing for you?”

“The party was getting a little boring,” Joon shrugged, a wicked little spark in his eyes, “as third years, you must know that we like to spend our Christmas nights with our lovers.”

“Oh…,” he mumbled, blushing.

Joon nudged the younger boy, laughing. “So how’s your holiday going? I bet you hyperactive kids are throwing one wild party up there.”

“Sort of,” Mir sighed, “they’re loud.” He glanced up, seeing that the snow had stopped falling for the time being. “…Hey, where are you going when you graduate this February?”

“So you already knew that I wasn’t going to the University?” Joon said quietly. He smiled faintly at his underclassmen, looping his arm through the boy’s and pulling him along down the stone road. “I was admitted into a special dance program at the same university Yesung plans on going to. The academy said they’ll help fund my education and so I accepted the admittance.”

Mir made no indication, no reaction. His eyes were poised on the steps he took through the quiet, well lit campus. They arrived in the main square, making a wide circle around the perimeter. “You told me…that I shouldn’t hang onto that music box.”

“Yeah?” Joon murmured.

“I let it go,” Mir said softly, “I gave it to someone else…but I don’t know if he understands what it means, or how it can help him.”

The third year didn’t take time to think about, speaking off of reaction. “There’s no right or wrong way of seeing that music box. In the end, it’s how it was received. If you really put feeling into the moment you gave it to him, I’m sure he’ll find some sort of interpretation.” Joon ruffled the younger one’s hair, grinning widely, “I’m happy that you let it go though. That means you’re starting to see the world right, little Mir?”

“Don’t tease me…,” he grumbled.

“Aw, you know you like it when I tease you,” Joon laughed, hugging the first year.

“Be quiet,” Mir rolled his eyes, leaning into the hug. They arrived back to the crossroads that led to the dorms respectively. He turned to properly hug the elder, arms tightening around Joon. “…Don’t do anything dumb while in the real world, hyung…”

“Why are you saying good-bye now?” Joon chuckled, flattening the shorter one’s hair. “Not planning on seeing me off on Graduation Day?”

“Nope…,” Mir muttered into the other’s jacket.

Joon sighed, eyes soft as he gazed down at the head burrowed in his shoulder. “I figured as much. Just come and find me once you graduate, okay?” He gently kissed the boy’s hair, patting his back.

 

“Mir!” Sungmin shoved the boy, watching him hit the window hard. “Oh…are you okay? Were you sleeping…?” He looked at Mir curiously.

“Guess I was,” he muttered, yawning and rubbing his head. Mir skimmed the interior of the cab, not seeing Ryeowook or Minho anywhere. “Where did they go?”

Sungmin frowned, glancing out the window, “To gamble.”

 


	41. Chapter 41

Zhoumi looked up as he saw the blonde amble up to the table. “Eunhyuk!” he waved happily, seeing the older boy smile and nod back.

“You look very pleased,” Eunhyuk remarked, taking the empty seat and removing his jacket. “Something good happened between you and Kyuhyun, huh?” He smirked, noting the immediate sparkle in Zhoumi’s eyes at the mention of the boy’s lover. Eunhyuk leaned back in his seat, arms crossed over his chest. “Oh my, something really good must’ve happened.”

Zhoumi nodded, blushing and playing with his mug of coffee. “We…We had sex. And it was…,” he shook his head, fingers running over the warm cup, “…to wonderful. Thank you, Eunhyuk…for pushing me I mean.”

“Is that why you called me here?” the blonde prompted, unable to help the proud smile on his lips. It was good to see Zhoumi in such high spirits. He had been scared for a while that his friend wouldn’t be able to get off the path, but he did. Eunhyuk liked knowing that Zhoumi was grateful to him, but it wasn’t that big of a deal was it? All he had done was be a friend. Then again, how many kids of their kind were used to that sort of friendship?

“Sort of,” Zhoumi confessed, “but I also missed talking to you. We haven’t really spoken much since then…and I haven’t been going to KUG...so I just kind of wanted to see you.”

Eunhyuk nodded understandingly. “Actually, that’s something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”

“Hmm?” Zhoumi sipped his drink, looking at Eunhyuk.

“Well I’m gonna be going to the academy’s University,” he explained, “and Kangin has accepted a full time job as a model after he leaves school. No one will be able to run KUG anymore. Originally we wanted to shut it down but there’s no time now. So what I’m asking is if you could handle it?”

Zhoumi stared at the boy across from him for a long moment. He hadn’t just asked him to take over _the_ KUG, the hottest spot for students of the academy. “Eunhyuk…how could I take it over? I mean…why can’t you shut it down? Or rather, why didn’t anyone shut it down sooner? You had all of Winter Break didn’t you?”

Eunhyuk sighed warily. “It’s like you think your little messy group is the only drama at this academy. We upperclassmen have a lot to deal with as well.”

“But such a huge operation, shouldn’t that have been a top priority?” Zhoumi insisted.

Eunhyuk sat forward, elbows on the edge of the table. “If you think that stuff with your boyfriend and his roommate is anything, then you’re far too innocent, Mi. By the time you graduate next year, maybe you’ll understand what real drama is.” His eyes looked old that instant, as if he were unable to further explain what he meant by those words. And perhaps that was the case. To properly express what had happened during the final break of his high school career would be too much and too impossible.

Zhoumi nodded carefully, letting the argument go. Something about the way Eunhyuk spoke had cut him off. Maybe the blonde really knew what he was talking about. “…Ah, sure…I’ll help with KUG. But how am I supposed to handle everything alone?”

The third year seemed to let out a sigh of relief before saying, “Don’t worry, we’ll find someone to help you. And if you ever need anything just send me a text and I’ll drive over.” Eunhyuk smirked when he saw the puzzled look on Zhoumi’s face. “University students can rent a car to go off campus.”

“Lucky,” Zhoumi laughed, smiling.


	42. Chapter 42

Minho pulled on Ryeowook’s shoulder, eyes large. “Pull out, pull out now,” he hissed into the other boy’s ear, grip tightening around that slender shoulder, “You don’t need to take the risk. We’ve got enough. It’s okay, we’ll get the rest another way.”

“No, this is fine,” Ryeowook murmured eyes on the roulette. He flexed his fingers and then looked up at the leering masked dealer. In a soft voice with guarded eyes, the normally innocent boy said, “All in.”

Minho groaned in contrast to the growing cheers of all the people around them. The pile of chips settled beside the seated Ryeowook was so tantalizing. But then it was dragged away by the dealer as he asked what the boy wanted to bet on. Minho swallowed the lump in his throat, eyes poised on Ryeowook, as was everyone else.

“Red 16,” Ryeowook stated.

The dealer nodded, setting the chips down on the chosen number.

“You’re absolutely crazy, kid,” Minho whispered harshly, listening to the sound of the wheel starting. He darted over, focused solely on the taunting little ball spinning round and round. It felt like it had synchronized with his heart, controlling the rapid beating. “Oh my…,” he ran fingers through his hair, turning away from the wheel as if it had burned him. Minho took deep breaths, trying to calm himself. This was too insane. He couldn’t be a gambler in the future, not with the kind of stress being put on him as a simple bystander.

The ticking of the rolling ball slowed to a stop. Minho gasped shortly, eyes squeezed shut. It was impossible. They lost it all. Over a hundred dollars just went down the drain. There was no way in hell that Ryeowook could’ve won that.

“Red 16!”

Minho looked up, catching Ryeowook’s shoulders and leaning over him to look at the dealer. “Are you serious?” he guffawed, eyes moving back and forth between the winning number and Ryeowook – that oh-so lovable boy. “No fucking way!” he exclaimed, watching the money get pushed towards them.

“Told you,” Ryeowook mumbled, grinning up at the other boy, “In cash, sir,” he said politely to one of the underground casino workers.

The worker nodded stiffly, glowering coldly at Ryeowook. He swiftly turned on his heel, disappearing into a back room somewhere off in the shadowy distance.

“I could kiss you right now!” Minho went on, shaking the smaller boy excitedly.

“Please don’t,” Ryeowook replied quickly. He smiled at his companion, saying, “That’s three hundred dollars. We can go home now.” Minho nodded eagerly, pulling Ryeowook up to his feet so he could hug the boy. The latter laughed a little, patting Minho’s back gently.

“Excuse me.” The celebrating pair turned to look at the interruption. Several suited men stood over them, eyeing the boys with unbarred disdain. One of them, a lean, tall man was giving them the harshest of glares. “We would like to have a word with both of you.”

Ryeowook leaned closer to Minho, eyeing the grim group warily. “Who are you?” he asked.

“We keep peace in this place,” he replied, “Now, kindly come with us. We would prefer it if a scene could be avoided, children.”

“We’re not children,” Minho barked, arms tightening around the smaller boy, ‘give us the money. We earned it fair and square, didn’t we?”

“Just come with us,” the man snapped, sending his men forward. They grabbed the two boys before either one could run away. He spun on heel and strode towards that backroom, except Minho and Ryeowook were joining the entourage. The two boys yelled and kicked but it was useless. Their strength wasn’t great enough to fight off five fully grown men.

They were dragged into a backroom which was really the alley. Ryeowook skidded across the snowy, dirty ground, protecting his neck and face as best he could. Rusted metal scraped his arms and fingers but that was the least of his worries. People were advancing on him. The young boy scrambled to his feet, backing away. He glanced at Minho who was shoved up against a wall. “What do you want?” Ryeowook demanded with a slight tremor.

“We’re just teaching you kids what happens when you cheat,” the leader smirked. “We don’t like being played especially by some know it all brats.” He spat in disgust, arms crossed over chest. “You seriously thought you could get away with taking so much money from us? It’s no fun when our customers think they’re the shit.”

A fist contacted Minho jaw, cracking his head sideways. The boy groaned low in his throat, head falling down. Blood dripped from his mouth, running down his chin. He made a sound somewhere between a sigh and growl. “Shut it,” the large man grunted, kneeing the boy in his stomach, “We don’t wanna hear your complaints.”

Ryeowook cringed, a gasp escaping his lips as a solid fist dug deep into gut. His legs gave out but there was a hand snatching up his collar, not allowing him to fall. The guard landed another heavy punch on his cheek, letting him sail across the small alleyway. Ryeowook slammed into the brick wall Minho was pressed against, spit and blood slipping down his torn lip.

“Are you okay?” Minho managed, looking down at Ryeowook. The latter offered a slight nod, eyes closed in pain. “You’re manlier than me,” he laughed, the noise becoming a cough.

“Didn’t I tell you to shut it?” the guard growled, throwing Minho to the ground. A loud crack resonated through the space, Minho’s head having hit the pavement without even a slight cushion. The guard swiftly pulled his leg back, sending it straight into the young man’s chest. The boy rolled over, holding his stomach tightly, body curling into a semi-ball.

Ryeowook crawled over to his friend, covering him from further attacks. “We can’t fight back!” he cried, coughing, “So just take the money…”

“On the contrary,” the leader remarked, “you never had it in the first place. Your offer is useless. And if you can’t fight back, doesn’t that just make you two the best punching bags in the world?” he laughed, grinding his heel into Ryeowook’s shoulder blade. “Cry kiddies! This is what happens when you try to play dirty.”

Ryeowook held on tight, shielding the bloodied and battered Minho. A gravelly shoe pressed down hard on the back of his neck, slamming over and over again into the soft skin. Ryeowook just closed his eyes, absorbing as much of the impacts as possible. It would’ve been different if perhaps Minho was doing better…but the boy was delirious now. Something warm and wet stained Ryeowook’s skin but he didn’t need to open his eyes to know what it was. He simply closed the small distance, entire body curling around Minho’s as sullied foot after foot slammed down on him.

“Hey Boss, we have more cheaters,” a person called, breaking the constant sound of kicking and dislodging bones.

The leader crouched down, fingers tangling in Ryeowook’s hair. He snapped the boy’s bloodied and bruised face back, forcing him to look. “You’re lucky this time, kid,” he said in a low voice, shoving Ryeowook’s head back down.

They retreated, slamming the metal door to the casino with finality. Ryeowook slowly rolled away from Minho, examining the boy through bleary eyes. The blood was only trickling now, the gash most likely smaller than expected. Ryeowook sighed, coughing and turning on his side. “Minho…,” he croaked, reaching out to brush hair out of the boy’s face.

Dark eyes opened a bit sliding over to Ryeowook. He nodded once, barely moving his head. Ryeowook managed a broken laugh, before sitting up unsteadily and grabbing Minho around the shoulders. He helped him up at a grueling pace, knees shaking terribly.

Minho gained some footing, taking the pressure off of the smaller boy. He dragged his feet forward, stumbling and limping out of the alley. Neither of them wanted to be around for Round 2. Sooner or later that group of thugs would finish beating the living shit out of those other cheaters and come back for Ryeowook and Minho.

However, the distance they managed to put between themselves and the gambling ring was miniscule. The pair got halfway down the street before collapsing again. Ryeowook couldn’t support the other with his neck any longer. He fisted the slush, teeth grinding together in controlled pain. “Too hard…,” Ryeowook muttered, eyes daring to close.

Minho grunted, “We should just sleep here…”

“Mmhmm,” Ryeowook mumbled.

***

“I’m not staying. I’ve already waited way longer than promised and they’re still not here,” the cabbie complained, starting the engine, “If you wanna get back to school, then it’s now or never.” He glared in annoyance at the two boys in his back seat.

Mir shot Sungmin a worried look. “Can’t we—”

“No,” the cabbie snapped, “Get out or not, it’s your choice.”

Sungmin shrugged helplessly. “Okay…we’ll go…” The car started moving almost immediately, the city becoming a distant image. He took Mir’s hand, squeezing it. “Wookie’s with Minho…maybe it’ll be okay…”

“What if it’s not?” Mir muttered.

“Then we have to go Teukie-hyung and get him to help us find them,” Sungmin stated. “There’s nothing we can do with just the two of us. If they’re in danger then we would have no way of helping them.”

Mir didn’t say anything. Why was there the assumption that they got into trouble? Maybe underground gambling wasn’t so bad… Then again…wasn’t the name enough to know how dangerous it could be?

***

Someone prodded Ryeowook in the side, gently at first and then with more force. The boy winced, opening his eyes to look at the person who had disturbed his sleep. A modestly dressed older fellow stared down at Ryeowook with curious eyes. “You can’t sleep on the street, kid,” the man stated, offering him a hand up.

“W-What?” Ryeowook looked around only to end up feeling the intense pain in his neck. He groaned, holding the nape of neck, head bent. A cold, slightly slimy concrete sidewalk lay beneath him. Where was he?

Minho sat up next to him, cursing a number of things under his breath with every movement. “What’s going on?” he mumbled, holding his cut head gingerly. “My head seriously hurts…” His fingers brushed over the shallow cut and a look of painful realization swept over his features. “I cut it open, didn’t I?” Minho sighed breathlessly.

“Not you,” Ryeowook replied softly, “the ground did.”

“Very funny,” he snapped weakly, finding wall and leaning back against it. The sweeper had apparently given up on them after they shifted off the middle of the walkway. Minho gently kept his hand against the cut, protecting it from the rough wall surface. “…They got us bad.”

Ryeowook nodded, touching his broken lip. “Sorry…”

“Not your fault,” Minho murmured, “I agreed to it.”

“At least it wasn’t all for nothing…”

Minho tilted his head a bit in confusion. The other boy reached stiffly into his pocket, fishing out a wad of cash with a small, crooked smile. Minho simply stared at the bundle, unable to process the image for a long moment. When he finally did, a hoarse laugh broke through his bloody lips. He lifted his fist, and Ryeowook tapped it, chuckling quietly back.

“Black Jack table?” Minho prompted, voice cracking.

Ryeowook nodded, tucking the money back into pocket. He looked up at the sky for a brief moment, seeing the darkness receding. “Hey Minho look,” the boy whispered, “We made it through the night.”

“You’re right,” he replied, eyes falling shut, “Must have someone looking out for us.”

There was no chance for that conversation to expand as their bodies claimed rest.

 


	43. Chapter 43

_Graduation Day_

Teukie-hyung rose to the podium, looking solemnly at the assembled student body. He inhaled slowly and then began addressing the crowd.

“Before we can say goodbye to all of you, there is a rather troubling event that we must all take a moment to understand. Two nights ago, two of our freshmen were found unconscious and severely beaten in the nearby city. They were taken to a hospital for treatment. As of last night, they have been brought back to the academy and are residing in the Main Building’s infirmary for the remainder of the Yearly Transitional Phase. For that reason, neither of them will be attending this ceremony and their belongings will be sent to the second year dorms. Let’s take a moment to feel for them because I’m sure many of you have been in similar situations,” Teukie-hyung gazed around at the faces then, seeing many of them cast their eyes down, “However you must remember something. They weren’t nearly as lucky as those of you standing here today. I have been there for every single happening for the past three years and I can say with confidence all of you that made trouble were saved. You did not blackout upon the streets of an unfamiliar city without any idea if you would wake up again. Those two boys…They weren’t rescued by some hero. They stuck the night out. They were brought to that hospital without a clue how or when it happened! All of you…All of you should be looking upon them with respect!” He kept a hardened gaze on all his peers, watching for anyone who dared to defy him. “Praise your underclassmen for what they’ve done!” Roars of support rippled through the throngs of students, none of them able to argue with their president – soon to be ex-president.

Teukie smiled his angelic smile and many had to catch their breath. The president cleared his throat and lowered his head slightly to his classmates and underclassmen. “Now then,” he began gently, speaking into the microphone, “It’s time to say goodbye.”

Eunhyuk touched Kangin’s arm, shooting his closest friend a weird look. “You’re not gonna listen to Teukie’s speech?”

Kangin shook his head, smiling and putting his hands into pockets as he turned to walk away. “I’m not gonna be saying goodbye to him, so why should I listen to it?”

The blonde watched his friend walk off, a grin stretching his lips. He crossed his arms, sighing playfully and turning back to listen to Teukie-hyung’s speech. What could Eunhyuk say? The troublesome president was a good speaker.

***

Mir strode down the hallway towards the infirmary. The sound of Teukie-hyung’s voice was muffled by the thick building walls but they could still be heard. He hadn’t planned on listening to the speech. It wasn’t in his nature to say goodbye…not anymore at least.

No one else was in the building, aside from anyone coming to visit Ryeowook and/or Minho. Mir expected that he would be the only one around at the time. Sungmin had promised Ryeowook he would say goodbye to Yesung for him as well as all of the Techies graduating. And again, Mir had no intention of doing any of that. He would see them all again. There was no point in dramatizing the situation by showing up to cry and offer muffled compliments.

He steps slowed as he came up to the infirmary’s closed door and saw Taemin standing outside of it. Mir furrowed his brow, gazing at the fidgeting pretty boy. “Are you going in?” he inquired in the quiet corridor.

Taemin jumped, whirling around to Mir. “H-Huh? No…I wasn’t going to,” he mumbled, preparing to high tail it out of there.

The other boy grabbed his arm, stopping him from fleeing. “…Have you gone to see Minho at all? I didn’t see you visiting when they were first brought back either…or any other day before that actually…”

“It’s none of your business…,” Taemin mumbled, no power in his voice.

“He’s your best friend isn’t he?” Mir said softly, firmly, “Why aren’t you going to see him?”

Taemin tugged at Mir’s hand, expression hidden behind his long hair. “…I’ve never seen him weak…did you know that?” his voice was barely audible, shoulders trembling, “I don’t know if I could handle it I mean…him...he’s the strong one…”

Mir tugged on Taemin’s wrist, pushing at the door. “You should go see him then. …Y-You should try being the strong one. Maybe it’ll make Minho feel better…even if he can’t really hear you right now.”

“No! …No…,” Taemin shook his head, breaking out of Mir’s grip and half running-half walking down the hallway. The latter chased after him, catching him before he could fly out the door. Mir caught his waist, jerking him back. “I don’t want to Mir…didn’t I say to leave me alone…?” He picked at the other’s fingers, trying pitifully to break away.

“You trusted me with your feelings just now,” Mir stated, forcing the words out, arms tightening around the slender boy, “Don’t regret that! I…I don’t want to hurt you…i-it’s just that you can’t run away every time you don’t know what to do or when someone else is hurting. This is your chance to be strong for M-Minho when he’s lost, Taemin.” Mir’s mouth closed and opened, all of his words spent. He seemed to talk so much whenever Taemin was around…it was quite troubling; however Mir couldn’t decide if it was worth the trouble yet.

“…Have you seen him?” Taemin asked in a small voice as if he were embarrassed to ask.

Mir nodded after letting go of the other boy. “He’s alive and he can still laugh…”

A tiny smile played over Taemin’s lips. “Good…” He looked past Mir towards the closed door. The boy’s eyes flickered with uncertainty and he glanced at Mir again, seeing the latter give him a curt nod. Taemin inhaled slowly, exhaling in the same manner. “Maybe I can see him,” he mumbled, casting his eyes down. Something flashed on his features and he reached out taking Mir’s hand hesitantly. “You were going to see them too…right?” Hope shone deep in the honey blonde boy’s eyes.

“…Yeah,” Mir affirmed, fingers gently closing around the other boy’s.

***

Kyuhyun silently entered the doctor’s office after dinner. Late winter grey skies were all he could see through the curtain missing window. Dead, frail trees created an endlessly prickly sea, all of the forest green long since gone. There was no wind crashing into the glass pane. It was perfectly, eerily quiet.

Inside the room as well, nothing and no one made a sound. Kyuhyun settled down in the visitor chair beside Ryeowook’s bed. The bedridden boy had a neck brace, face covered in cuts and bruises. Bandages covered both arms as well as forehead. Heavy purple shadows darkened the bottoms of his eyes, standing viciously out against the pale, sickly skin. Kyuhyun’s eyes trailed down to the scratched up hands; the same hands that could play such beautiful piano. They were wrecked now, appearing rough and lived in.

“Kyu…?” Ryeowook mumbled, eyes slowly opening.

“Yeah, it’s me,” he murmured, “How are you feeling?”

“Better,” the boy replied, smiling a bit, “I’m happy that you’re here though…”

“…You missed Teukie-hyung’s goodbye speech,” Kyuhyun remarked, “he mentioned you and your friend for a while. He really made us feel guilty…”

“That’s no good,” Ryeowook chuckled, stifling a cough.

“More importantly…I…,” Kyuhyun paused, eyes falling to the other’s battered hand, “I’m moving out…this coming term.” Ryeowook tried to sit up, but Kyuhyun pushed him back down, holding him there as he continued talking. “The second and third years can room together…so I’m going to move in with my…Zhoumi.”

“D-Did I do something wrong?” Ryeowook asked, painfully hurt eyes focused solely on Kyuhyun. There were no other distractions in the room. The only other occupant was fast asleep after taking his medication. “Why…Why do you want to move out?”

Kyuhyun shook his head. “This…It’s too much. I thought I could continue dealing with you but things are becoming too crazy. I don’t want to have to see you like this.” His eyes hardened and he pronounced each word, making sure Ryeowook didn’t miss a thing, “You and I don’t see on the same level anymore. There’s nothing that connects us but time and I don’t want to waste away any more years on this. I want to explore what I feel for Zhoumi…I’m ready to let go of everything for him.”

Ryeowook didn’t appear to be listening anymore, his eyes vacant. He turned away from Kyuhyun. Those quivering lips had fallen to a straight line, allowing nothing to be conveyed. The seated boy stood up, stepping away from the silent one. “Bye, Ryeowook.”

“It’s Wookie…”

Kyuhyun shook his head, heading towards the door quietly, “No it’s not. It’s Ryeowook now.”

The door opened before Kyuhyun could open it and he came face to face with Sungmin. The latter gave him a look on contempt. “Hey Hound,” he muttered, pushing past him and walking over to Ryeowook, “you should be going. I’ll look over Wookie.”

Ryeowook met Kyuhyun’s gaze momentarily, eyes flitting away almost immediately. Kyuhyun put a hand on the door frame, head lowered. His voice was soft as he said, “I’m going then.” The door shut with a gentle click.

“Don’t go…,” Ryeowook whispered to the air.

Sungmin touched his friend’s cheek with the back of his hand, eyes lowered in worry. “What? Are you okay Wookie? What’s the matter…?”

“…He left me…”

 


End file.
